


Touch In The Night

by pikkulintu



Category: Initial D
Genre: Alternate Universe - Historical, Assassin Keisuke, By which I mostly mean the dreams, Emotional Manipulation, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Feudalism, Future nsfw, Healing, Injury, M/M, Minor character death (OCs), Note the archive warning and rating, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Other Characters May Still Be Added, Slow Burn, Vaguely Supernatural Elements That Are Not Explained, battles, kind of like the middle ages, or actually more like Strangers to Friends to Enemies to Friends to Lovers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-10
Updated: 2021-01-18
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:22:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 14
Words: 52,506
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24105892
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pikkulintu/pseuds/pikkulintu
Summary: Takumi is a son of a lord, who would prefer to live his life like a commoner. However, the peaceful times are coming to an end, forcing him to take his place as the heir. As the plans of others begin to unravel he meets an interesting new acquintace in the woods, who might prove to be his greatest foe or the most valuable companion of all.
Relationships: Fujiwara Takumi/Takahashi Keisuke
Comments: 61
Kudos: 64





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> The idea for this story first came to my mind about a year ago when I hear an epic orchestral cover of Déjà Vu (can be found on youtube) and it somehow gave me a medieval vibe :D I've always loved fantasy and historical fiction, and kind of wanted to try writing it myself too. The story went throug many changes in the time I thought about it, ending up way more grim than in my original "knights in shining armour" -thoughts, also now including major character death whooops. The story also expanded, so be prepared for many more chapters to come. Don't worry though, I am very invested in this and certainly won't drop it midway :D
> 
> Kudos and comments are highly appreciated if you like this, they really keep me going!

The last rays of day shined through the leaves of treetops, speckling the path Takumi walked with light. The deep green moss absorbed all noise from his steps, as if he was a ghost, a being unimportant to all other things living in the forest. Right there, away from all other people and the problems they created he couldn’t have been happier. To be free, to only worry about himself and no one else. The forest was the only place he could feel like that, even when it was just momentarily. Despite his deepest wishes, destiny had chosen him to be born as an only son of a lord, whose wife had died many years ago and who still refused to remarry. That made him irreplaceable to the whole province. However, he could not blame his father for his choice as he himself despised the idea for marrying a total stranger just for the benefits of the union. 

As he had already reached an age where most noblemen were at least engaged, the proposals had only grown more frequent. There were many who wanted to join their family with a future lord, usually to gain a better social standing and wealth. Even as their area was the smallest of the nine provinces of the kingdom it had been blessed with rich natural resources. Wood grew tall and straight and the fertile ground was perfect for agriculture. Many of their lakes hid iron ore and the blacksmiths knew how to make best of it. The lordship of the area had been a fitting gift for his great-grandfather for saving the king’s life. Sooner or later he would actually have to think about continuing their lineage, but for now he tried to ignore such thoughts.

Suddenly the small oak on the side of the path rustled and Takumi flinched, already reaching for the bow on his back. Fortunately it wasn’t anything threatening. A squirrel ran from the tree, an acorn on its mouth. It stopped for a moment to look at him and then continued on, jumping to one of the bigger trees, vanishing as soon as it had appeared. Takumi relaxed, breathing out slowly. He closed his eyes and focused on letting go of all of his depressing thoughts. The day had been rainy, and the fresh earthy smell filled his mind as he enjoyed the serenity of the forest. This was where belonged, deep into the woods of their land.

The warmth of light disappeared from his face, and he opened his eyes. Night was rapidly approaching, and he had to hurry to reach the clearing he intended to camp at. A growl of his stomach remembered him that besides a place to sleep he also needed to eat. The joy of wandering sometimes made him forget the flow of time and the needs of his body. There were still some mushrooms and berries he had picked yesterday, but something more filling would be needed for the night. His hopes were on catching some rabbits from the clearing, where they often stayed. The thought of warm stew suddenly enhanced his hunger, and he hurried on.

*

As he reached the familiar trail that went through a small group of spruces the night was only a moment away. He halted for a second to calm his breath after walking the distance in a half of the time from usual. After all, if he hoped to catch anything at all he would have to approach the clearing as quietly as possible. He pulled the bow from his back and reached for his quilt, taking out two arrows. He placed the first one to the string, and kept the second in his right hand, ready to be used immediately if the other one was fired. Then he slowly started to approach the clearing, careful to not step on any large sticks or other things that would make noise and alert the rabbits. He was already so close that he saw a glimpse of the grass behind the spruce branches. A step more, and an another. As he took the final one he raised the bow, ready to shoot at any moment.

Instead of the serene view he had expected a small fire greeted him from under the tall oak. Sparks flew high and burning wood crackled in the small stone circle fireplace he had built. For a moment the whole thing seemed like some sort of a fever dream, coming out of nowhere. Soon Takumi realized he couldn’t have noticed the fire before as the wind blew from behind him, carrying the smoke away, and the spruces had muffed out any sound. However that wasn’t the most pressing matter on his mind. If there was a neat little fire, there had to be someone near who had lit it.

He took a step back and hid among the spruces, still holding the bow tightly. For a moment nothing happened, but suddenly something moved in the shadows, just on the border where the fire’s light faded. A man wearing a dark cloak walked into the light, his face hidden under the hood. He had two rabbits on his other hand, and a bow on the other. As he turned the light gleamed on the hilt of the sword he carried on his back. Takumi furrowed his brows. It was rare to run into people on these parts of the forest, as the closeness of the border scared most away. The nearest village was a good days travel away from there. The past rivalries between the provinces had led people to avoid the area.

Unsure of what to do he weighed his two options. Turning around and making a camp in the forest, or openly walking to the man. The first one was less than ideal as many things lurked in the dark forest, most of them less than friendly. In an open area near a fire they didn’t usually dare to approach, but in the cover of the woods they grew bolder. Not to mention the hunger crawling in his stomach, which really made the second option feel appealing. He really didn’t have enough food on hand, and without a good meal the next day would be exhausting.

Looking down to his word-down clothing he made his decision. The old leather and musty green cloak with a few holes made him look like any other young hunter. There were no traces of his family’s wisteria emblem that decorated most of his better outfits. No one would recognize him as the heir of the lands if they hadn’t seen him before, which was unlikely. Sure, the people living in the town around their manor would probably know him, but it was unlikely the stranger was anyone of them. He hadn’t represented his family outside the province in years, and the last time he had even officially crossed the border was when he had still been a child. The times when he had wandered over the borders in the middle of the woods obviously didn’t count. Recognizing him by a general description was also a longshot, as short brown hair with bangs, and dark blue eyes fit so many other men in the area too.

Takumi slowly lowered his bow and hung it to his back. He quickly checked that the knives hidden in his boots were still in place, unseen but easy to grab if things went awry. The stranger had a sword, but he had been trained to fight opponents like that. He stretched his neck and shoulders and sighed. Everything was as good as it would be, but he felt nervous. Pushing the feeling aside he looked to the ground and found what he needed. A large twig that seemed dry, perfect for alerting the man of his presence. After all, sneaking up to him probably wouldn’t lead to the outcome he was hoping for. That in mind he stepped onto the twig.

The loud snap was clear in the silence. The man turned his head sharply and lift his right hand on the sword’s hilt. He looked straight into where Takumi was, but the spruces and darkness hid him. After a moment he let go of his sword and moved away the hood that covered his face to get a better view.

Takumi gasped surprisedly as he saw the stranger’s golden hair gleaming in the flickering light of the fire. It was extremely rare to see anyone with hair other than black or brown, so much so that other variants were often thought as some kind of signs. A golden hue as such was a blessing from angels, a promise of something good in the child’s future. Takumi had a faint memory from his childhood, back from when his mother was still alive, of seeing a child with such a light hair but it had been the only time. He shook his head a bit frustratedly, thinking to himself. _Don’t let your mind wander now. Those are just some old superstitions; they don’t matter. I just have to assure him to share the fire for the night, that’s all._

The man seemed to relax, and he decided it was time to move. He broke a second twig and walked out of the forest. As the stranger noticed him emerging from the darkness he jumped up, again grabbing the sword. The fire was between them, and Takumi got a good look on his face. He didn’t have to feign all of his surprise as the stranger’s bright blue eyes met his. The clearness and depth instantly reminded him of the pond near his home, where he had often played as a child. His mind wandered onto the warnings of spirits of water that would catch careless children, before he managed to collect his thoughts, and forced a carefree smile on his face, greeting the man. “Oh! Fancy seeing someone else in these woods, what a rare occasion. How did you end up in here?”

Trying to give off as nonthreatening image as possible seemed to work to some extent as the stranger eyed him from head to toe and let go of his sword. Him deeming Takumi harmless enough wasn’t too surprising as his only visible weapon was an old hunting bow, he was shorter and leaner than the man and acted friendly. The greeting was answered soon after. “I was tracking a deer and before I noticed it was already too late to turn back, so I decided to camp here for the night.”

Takumi had his doubts about the story, as he had never seen any hunter carry a sword. Bows and knives were much more common. Swords were big and clumsy, too much weight to carry around in the woods. They were to use against other humans, not animals. Still, Takumi had to get along with the man, so he decided to believe that maybe he just didn’t mind the extra weight, as he seemed well-built. “Well, I see you still had better hunting luck than I did. I just picked up some mushrooms and berries, mind to share your meat for those?”

The stranger seemed a bit hesitant, so he decided to push a bit more. “This is my usual camping spot when I’m on hunting trips. It’s already dark so I’d rather avoid getting back to the forest for today.”

He stayed silent for a moment, but the words seemed to work as he sighed and answered. “I did wonder about who had built the fireplace. I guess it was you then? Fine. There is room for both of us.”

Takumi decided to seem as carefree as possible, so he smiled in return. “Great, I cook the food if you clean the rabbits.”

It seemed like the man was fine with that, as he sat back down and started to prepare the meat. Takumi sat on the opposite side of the fire and dug through his bag to find the small pot he always had with him. He put it over the fire and poured in the last bit of the red wine he had brought, before cleaning and cutting the mushrooms into the mix. The man glanced at them, trying to not make it obvious, probably wanting to make sure that they really were of the edible kind. He cleaned the rabbits quickly but wasted some parts in the process. As if he knew how to do that but was a bit rusty. Any common hunter would have done a better job.

The meat was added into the pot, and for a moment they just stared the dancing flames. The silence started to feel a bit pressuring and Takumi felt like he needed to cut it. He chose the most obvious route, and asked “So, where are you from? It’s not usual to see hair like yours around here.”

“It is not that usual from where I’m from either. It seems to run in my mother’s family though.”

Takumi noticed how he smoothly avoided a part of his question but decided to let it slip. His accent already told him that he was most likely from the north, outside of the Fujiwara province. There weren’t any emblems on his clothes or weapons, so he didn’t seem to have a connection to their army or anything at least. Without thinking Takumi answered “That is a lucky sign.”

The stranger laughed but it sounded forced. “You think so?”

He couldn’t really answer no to that, so he just mumbled “That is believed in my village.”

“Is it far from here?”

“About a day’s travelling on foot. Most don’t come this far on their hunts, but I’ve been doing so my whole life, so I’m used to it.”

“You earn your living with hunting then?”

“Pretty much.”

That of course wasn’t really the case as Takumi’s family standing gave him everything he needed, but it was easier to weave an image of himself based on the stranger’s assumptions. Hunting was just something he had learned how to do so that he could make his journeys longer. To be independent at least in some aspects of his life. His father had trained him to use weapons since he was young so that he could protect himself, but mostly let him do what he wished. He too was a free soul, still somewhat broken by his wife’s death, not wanting to bound his son down as he was before it was necessary.

Silence fell between them as they sank back into their thoughts. The stew bubbled in the pot. Takumi threw in some juniper berries for flavour and added a pinch of salt. An owl hooted in the distance, the fire crackled and a small wind hummed in the trees. The darkness was thick outside of the circle of light the fire created. The stranger’s hair almost seemed to glow. It was no surprise someone had decided that it had to be angelic blessing as it reminded Takumi of the halos they had in paintings. He looked back at the stew and judged it to be ready to eat. He poured one portion into a plate and decided to eat straight from the pot himself. As he handed over the food he broke the silence. “And you, living off hunting?”

“No, not really. My family needed some more meat and I was free to go so I did.” The man blew air to his first spoonful to cool it before adding “Being alone in the woods is calming after all the hustle of living within the middle of humans”.

“I agree.”

The man took his first spoonful, and his eyes widened a bit. “Wow, this is good. How did you manage to get it taste like this with so few ingredients?”

Takumi smirked. “From experience. The first times I cooked ended up horrible.”

“Wouldn’t believe that judging by this.”

“Thanks.”

They ate the rest of the meal in silence and curled up in their cloaks to sleep. The summer was nearing its end, and the night wind carried a touch of fall in its chilliness. Their fire kept them warm and Takumi fell into a deep sleep sometime during the night. As he woke up with the dawn the stranger was nowhere to be seen. Only a dry spot in the grass wet with morning dew told him that someone had indeed been sleeping there for the night. He felt kind of disappointed. Even though they hadn’t shared many words during last night he had been at ease with him. He hadn’t even asked his name, he suddenly realized.

As he was leaving he observed the marks the stranger had left on the ground. Seemed like he was heading back to north. Taking the opposite direction Takumi started his journey back home. After all, he still needed to show his face back there from time to time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As someone might have noticed, the name of this work is a reference to Battle Beast's song Touch In The Night. As was with my first fic, I am still listening to it :D In addition to that Nightwish's new album Human. :II: Nature. and Beast In Black's album From Hell With Love are the ones that I mostly listen to while writing. I higly recommend trying those if you like rock/metal music. (or even if you don't bc it's nice to try new things once in a while uwu)


	2. Chapter 2

It was already midnight when Takumi finally reached his home after a few days travelling. Moonlight had been bright enough for him to travel the remaining distance without fear, and the roads alone made travelling much safer than walking in the middle of the woods.

The main gate of the wall surrounding their manor had already been closed for the night, but that didn’t stop him. Not bothering to disturb the guard, who most likely would be nodding off by now, he followed the wall to the back of the manor. The wines were untamed there and had grown to be strong enough to hold his weight as he climbed over the wall. It was almost too easy to get in unnoticed.

Except that there was someone who saw him. As Takumi jumped to the ground he caught a glimpse of the dark eyes looking straight at him. He couldn’t help but to flinch, despite recognizing the man instantly. It was one of the knights serving under his family, named Iketani. A few years his senior, he had been around since his childhood. First as an apprentice and for the last year as his designated guard. He had soon noticed that trying to stop Takumi from his travels was not going to happen, as he managed to sneak out in the most creative ways. After Takumi had talked his father out of blaming the knight for not looking after his son properly they had been more or less friends.

“I thought it was about time you got back.” Iketani said and moved towards Takumi from under a large wisteria tree to which he had been leaning on.

“You know me too well.”

He smiled crookedly, but there still was warmth in his words. “Hardly. I didn’t catch you on your way out this time either.”

Takumi answered his smile. “One point for me then. Tell me, what has happened while I was out? It’s not usual for you to seek me out so much as to come wait in the middle of night.”

“A king’s courier came today, in the evening. He demanded to see both you and your father face to face to give a message. The lord managed to delay it until the morning by feigning you were not well. After all there is no way we could just tell him that we have no idea where you are. Damn good you came back now, there is no telling how long we could have kept that on. The man seems impatient.”

That worried Takumi. Usually the couriers only came to collect tax money, but that had been done for the year already. This kind of approach meant that the king most likely had some kind of an order to give. For the few times he remembered from the past, those orders usually demanded more soldiers to be given to fight in the crown’s army. But there hadn’t been any problems with their neighbouring nations in a while, at least any that he knew of. So what on earth could it be? He would have to wait until the morning to find out, but knowing the situation still helped.

Takumi thanked Iketani for delivering the news and started to walk back to the manor. The knight followed him and chatted about the more mundane things that had been happening around the place, like that one of the horses had had a completely black foal, and whether the gardener would want to demolish the wines from the walls.

Despite his exhaustion after a long day of travelling Takumi managed to wash up before falling into his bed. It was mostly thanks to Iketani who teasingly mentioned that it wouldn’t be very aristocratic of him to wake up with twigs on his hair and dirt on his face. Combing through his damp hair with his fingers he relaxed on the soft mattress. It took him a good while to fell into a restless sleep as he pondered on what was about to come.

*

Takumi woke up to the rising sun as usual. Iketani had clearly noted the servants that he was back as he was greeted with a pile of fresh clothes on his drawer. As he dressed up in the velvet embroidered with his family crest he felt out of place. He much preferred the modest clothes of a hunter. But he needed to at least look the part of a future lord when he was home. Sighing deeply he left the comfort of his room and walked towards the informal dining room where he and his father always had their breakfast.

As expected Bunta was already there, reading a letter. He frowned as usual and smoked his old pipe. Noticing Takumi straight away he raised his eyes to meet his glance. “Seems like you got back in one piece once again.”

“I can take care of myself. You taught me well.”

“So I did.” He answered without even trying to deny it and turned back to the paper.

Takumi reached out for bread and cheese as he tried to get some information out of him. “Do you have any idea of what the courier wants?”

His father frowned even deeper. “Not really. We see him soon, so eat up.”

Takumi did as he was told, enjoying the selection of different fruits and some fresh milk he didn’t get in the forest.

*

They moved to the office room on the second floor of the manor to meet the courier. He was a man with unpleasantly sharp features, who didn’t seem too satisfied he had been kept waiting. He cleared his throat before announcing his message. “In the name of our king you have been invited to the winter solstice ball held in honour of his long and peaceful reign.”

Takumi frowned, and couldn’t help but to blurt out his thoughts. “The king’s solstice ball is annual, and we are invited every year by letter. What is different now?”

The courier turned his sharp eyes to Takumi from his father. “You have a tendency not to attend despite the invitation. This year the king celebrates his 20th year on the throne, and he _will_ have all of the lords and their heirs to celebrate with him. There is no option of not attending. I have come to make sure this is understood.”

Bunta seemed annoyed at the words. After all he despised being told what to do more than anything else. “You can tell his highness that both of us will be present.”

The courier bowed shallowly, saying he would convey the answer to the king, before walking out of the room without waiting for a permit to leave. Bunta looked as he walked out and muttered to himself so quietly Takumi hardly heard him. “This is why I don’t like people from the capital.”

They had over two months of time before the ball, but as the lord leaving his place was an unusual occurrence many things needed to be prepared for the household to run without him. Takumi helped to plan the trip for the rest of the afternoon, along with other mundane tasks the lord had to deal with. The things varied from peasant asking help for building new wells, to hiring a new stable boy to the manor, and to calculating taxes from shopkeepers. The job had to be done, but Takumi couldn’t help it as his attention started to slip from the papers. He stared through the window to the hills around them. What he would have given to be free from all of this. To be free to make a living off the forest. But it was his duty to become the lord and take care of the area and everyone living there, so he sighed and turned his back to the papers. After trying to read a few lines without registering anything from them his thoughts slipped again, now to the man he had met in the clearing. What would be his day like? Surely nothing as dry as calculating taxes…

“Take a break.” Takumi flinched at his father´s voice. He hadn’t realized how deep into his thoughts he had delved into before his voice shook him up.

“I…”

His father lifted the corner of his mouth a bit, which was pretty much smiling for him. “I know you. Go spar with Iketani for a moment or something. You’ll be more efficient after that.”

“I’ll take up on that offer then.”

Bunta just waved his hand towards the door without looking up from his own pile of papers.

*

Time flowed on with unstoppable speed as Takumi spend his days learning about the duties of a lord, sparring his skills in fighting and riding. In a moment autumn arrived and coloured the hills into a bright canvas of yellow, orange and red. In the next moment the leaves already fell, and the wind grew colder. The pond near the manor froze over, and as Takumi opened his windows the next day, the world had been coloured white with the first snow. It was still a fortnight until the winter solstice. The first time he would go to the capital as an adult. He stayed still, looking at the hills. The need to unravel his rambling thoughts grew by the second. Without thinking more he moved back to his bed and pulled out the trunk from under it. The familiar and comforting feel of wool greeted him as he quickly put on the worn down clothes, adding a few extra layers to shield him from the cold. His father didn’t as much as nod as he saw what he was wearing. “I’ll be back in a few days.” Takumi said as he almost ran out of the door into the comforting silence of the forest.


	3. Chapter 3

Snowflakes slowly ascended to the ground all around Takumi as he walked through the whiteness that had covered the land overnight. Light peaked from between the clouds, making the snow sparkle here and there. Most of it was untouched, let alone the few traces of birds and a fox. He was heading to north, to an abandoned cottage he had been using before too. In summertime he slept outside but in winter a roof over one’s head was much preferred.

On his way to the cottage he had to cross a river, which to his surprise was covered in ice and snow. The flow in this part was quite fast, meaning that it rarely froze and when it did it usually wasn’t thick enough to hold a full grown adult. Takumi tested the strength of the ice by carefully moving his weight to it while constantly holding on to a branch hovering over the water. The ice held his weight, but the low crackling noises told him that it would most likely broke under him if he was to go any further. Instead of risking it he decided to follow the riverbed to upstream where the river was wider and shallower.

He glanced at the sun’s position on the sky. There was maybe an hour or two of daylight left. Just enough for him to get to the crossing and walk to the cottage. Hopefully the roof would still be in one piece and the things he had left inside nice and dry. The clouds had slowly been clearing from the sky, so it would be a cold night, and dealing with moist firewood would be troublesome. Takumi tightened his fur hood to his jaw as he picked up his pace.

After following the coiling riverbed for a good moment he suddenly heard a loud sound from ahead, most likely caused by the ice cracking. He rushed on to see the river behind the mound. For the whole day he had been walking without seeing anyone, so he expected maybe a deer or an elk crossing the ice, as they often did. For his great surprise he saw a man carefully moving over the frozen river. Even more surprising was that it was the same one he had met on the clearing at the end of summer. He was now taking a huge risk by crossing the ice.

As if his thoughts had caused it, the ice suddenly cracked even louder and broke under the man. The loud voice echoed through woods, added with a surprised yelp. The man managed to grab the ice so that the flow didn’t take him under right away, but it was close. Only his shoulders and hands were above the ice, and the strong current clearly tried to pull him away.

There was no time to think, Takumi had to work fast. The man lost strength to cold second by second. He ran to the shore, throwing his bag to the ground and frantically taking his cape off his shoulders. The river wasn’t that wide in this part, so the cape might be just long enough to reach him.

The man seemed astonished that someone had just showed up in the middle of nowhere. Cold made him shudder as he spoke. “..H-how?”

Takumi didn’t bother answering him, instead flinging the cape towards him, staying on the ground himself. The corner of the fabric landed over the stranger’s fingertips. “Grab that!”

The man moved his hand painstakingly slowly but managed to get a good hold of the fabric. “Now try to get your upper body to the ice as I pull, all right?”

He was answered with a small nod. That was enough. Takumi sat down to the ground and placed his feet on the rocks to get a stable position. Slowly he started to pull the cape, praying that it could take the pressure. First it seemed like nothing happened, even though they both tried their best.

Suddenly a new piece of the ice broke under the man’s arms and for a moment he disappeared under the surface. Takumi’s heart skipped a beat before the blonde head surfaced once again. He was still holding the cape on his hands. For a moment Takumi feared that he just didn’t have the power to get up from the water, but it seemed they had some luck on their side as the man shuddered “Th-There is-s a rock-k under my righ-ht foot. I think-k I can jump-p to th-he ice.”

Takumi thought about it for a second. The ice might break again if he did that, but there weren’t too many options. “Do it. Now.”

The man grouched a bit before jumping up. The ice screaked loudly as his upper body hit the surface. Both men held their breath, but the ice didn’t break. Taking a deep breath to calm his mind Takumi slowly started to pull the cape again. The man had used up his powers, barely managing to keep his hold. In a few excruciating moments Takumi got him to the shore, and for a moment they laid next to each other, both exhausted. But they had to get moving, the danger still wasn’t over.

“There is an old abandoned cottage near here that I use when hunting. We can make a fire there and get you warmed up, but we must get moving as soon as possible. You’ll freeze to death at this rate.”

The man tried to get up, but his hands gave up on him. Takumi helped him into a sitting position. “You need to take your clothes off squeeze as much water off as possible, then put them back on. I don’t have any spares unfortunately so that’s the best we can do.”

It seemed like the man was beyond questioning anything Takumi said, so he just took his clothes off, struggling as his hands shivered in cold. Takumi helped him to squeeze them before handing them back. The man had trouble pulling his shirt on, and he helped him tug it down. He also gave him the cape that was half dry. It seemed like the stranger’s belongings had washed away, excluding the sword that had hung on his back.

In a few moments they were walking towards upstream. “I… I c-can’t thank you enough-gh. You saved-d my l-life.”

Takumi waved his hand. “We can talk about that later, now we just need to get you warmed up.”

He led the man through the easiest route, in as fast a pace as he could move. It took them about 15 minutes to reach the crossing. Water was shallow there and large rocks allowed them to cross quite easily. Though the running water and cold had made them icy and dangerously slippery.

Takumi turned to look at the man, who was shivering behind him. “You go first so I can try to catch you if you slip.”

The man looked like he wanted to complain about being looked after, but acknowledged he was in no such position and instead slowly placed his feet to the first rock on the river. Takumi followed close behind him. He was too focused on looking at the man and ended up slipping himself. His left foot dipped into the icy water, while his right knee painfully hit to the rock. He let out a loud curse, and the man turned to look at him. He managed to smirk through his shivering teeth. “Seems l-like you didn’t n-need to worr-ry about me after-r all.”

Takumi smirked back. “Don’t talk so big while you shiver so much you can’t even talk without stuttering.”

His grin didn’t fade. “Come on-n, let’s go th-henn.”

Takumi noticed how the small icicles on his blond hair glimmered in the sun as he turned back to where they were heading. He must be freezing, he thought to himself and ignored the coldness of his own leg.

*

The cottage had once been used by the woodcutters from nearby villages, but after they had harvested what they could it had been abandoned. A few decades had gone by, and now the area was filled with tall and narrow birches. He had discovered the place some years back and used it ever since. The place had a large fireplace for heating and cooking, a bed, and a small table and a few stools. The air inside was cold, and the furs and blankets on the bed a bit clammy, but the roof was intact. Takumi thanked his past self for chopping a hefty pile of wood so they wouldn’t need to worry about that now. In a moment he managed to start a small fire from the dry birchbark he always carried. While carefully feeding twigs to the fire, he instructed the man. “Take your clothes off and wrap into the blankets on the bed, I’ll get this fire bigger in a second and it’ll get warmer.”

He heard the man moving behind him but didn’t turn to see if he had done what he asked. It took a while to get the fire to catch onto some bigger logs, but as it did he was satisfied with it. Turning to look he saw the man had cocooned inside the bedding. He was watching Takumi but seemed sleepy.

“Don’t sleep yet, you are not warmed up.”

“I feel like I have used up all of my powers.”

“You seem like it too. Wait a moment, I’ll get you something to eat.”

*

Takumi handed out a steaming cup, and a bare arm snuggled through the blankets to take it. A bit warily he sniffed it before tasting. The caution turned into delight as he drank. “Ahh, I can feel the warmth flowing in. What is this? It’s good.”

“A mix of dried bilberries and raspberry leaves soaked in water with a bit of honey.”

“So it’s like tea? You can make it yourself?”

“I have, but this batch I bought from an old lady in my village.”

He seemed genuinely astonished at that which surprised Takumi. It was a well-known drink in the area. Actual tea was an expensive luxury usually only seen in manors or castles, but the herb drinks were for the common people. The man stared at his cup with a childlike enthusiasm, which he didn’t dare to interrupt. Instead he turned back to the fireplace to prepare a small stew from the turnips and dried meat he had brought.

Complete darkness had set outside by the time they ate their meal. The man was fast asleep after getting something to fill him up. The cottage had slowly warmed up, and Takumi was starting to get drowsy as well, as all of the day’s excitement hit him. He threw a few bigger logs into the fireplace so that the fire would burn longer. After gathering the clothes from the floor and placing them near the fire to dry, he took off his own clothes and hanged them to dry as well. He had never been one to overthink things, so he just lifted the blankets and slipped next to the sleeping man. The warmth under there lulled him to sleep in a moment.

*

_Takumi was standing on the edge of the pond near his home. It had frozen over, and the fish swam under the clear coating. It was night but the snow seemed to glow on its own so much that he could clearly see everything. He had no memory of how he had ended up there and looking around he didn’t see anyone else anywhere. Without any idea of what to do he took a step forward. There was no sound of the snow snarking, as he would have expected. Takumi looked at his feet. They were bare, and snow had melted under them. Frowning he looked at what else he was wearing. A short sleeved shirt with thin linen pants. His frown deepened. He didn’t feel cold at all. If anything he felt like he was burning. He tried to grab the snow to cool off, but it melted as he touched it._

_A sudden movement in the opposite side of the pond caught his attention. A dark haired woman, in an emerald green dress, and wisteria blooms in her hair walked towards him. Takumi didn’t breath as he met the woman’s eyes. They were the same shade he had seen so many times in a painting in his father’s study. Eyes he had once known himself but forgotten. He could barely talk as he forced the word out of his mouth. “M-mom?”_

_The woman smiled but there was an unbearable sadness in her eyes. He moved her hands and Takumi saw that he was holding a baby in her arms. Just like in the painting. “Wait… is that… me?”_

_She didn’t answer, but kneeled down and a toddler, maybe 2 or 3 years old, with golden hair and round blue eyes appeared from behind her. She gently touched the golden curls and smiled to the boy. Another woman came from behind her, taking the boy's hand. She had the same hair and eyes as him. His mother perhaps? Takumi’s mother got back up. She and the others looked at him. Suddenly she spoke up. “Don’t let anyone else decide your enemies for you.”_

_Her voice. It was smooth and low, calming. Takumi’s eyes filled with tears. He had always wanted to know the voice of her mother. Without thinking he took a step to the ice, and then another. He needed to get to her. Now. Mindlessly he walked towards her until a sharp voice from behind stopped him._

_“Takumi! Get back, the ice is melting!”_

_He turned and saw the blonde man he had saved running from the forest towards the pond. He was bruised and held his right hand over his left shoulder. Blood was dripping to his black armour and he looked like he could faint at any moment. How could that have happened?_

_"TAKUMI, MOVE!”_

_His desperate tone finally reached Takumi’s mind and he looked at his foot. The ice was melting, just as the snow had. He looked at the man, and then sharply turned to his mom, who still looked at him with sorrow. Before he could do anything a loud crack pierced the air and the ice broke under him. He was floating to the bottom. His mind told him to swim up, but it was like lead had filled his limbs. There was no way he could move. As his consciousness began to fade he suddenly realised that the man had called him by his name, even though he had never told him that. He was running out of air and the mass of water began to feel crushing as he finally succumbed to the darkness._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually searched info for what you should do if you fell into ice, and got up only to not have dry clothes available. I wrote that here, so now you know too lol :D In addition to that, the person who fell should be moved carefully, but it wasn't possible in this fic (sorry Keisuke)


	4. Chapter 4

Takumi snapped out of his sleep, gasping for air, cold sweat covering his neck. He tried to jolt out of the bed to escape the feeling of drowning, but something was holding him down. Taking a few deep breaths he slowly recalled where he was and what had happened yesterday. The thing holding him in place was indeed a muscular arm, which tightly tugged him to the warm chest behind him. The man had groaned a bit after the sudden movement but didn’t seem to have been awakened.

A dim bluish glow from outside shed its light to the room. The fire had burned down and in contrast to the rest of Takumi’s body his nose and cheeks were freezing. The memory of his dream was rapidly fading. He recalled the place, and his mom with the children. He hadn’t recognized the older one and was already forgetting his face. And then someone had been calling his name… The dream didn’t seem to make any sense, so he just assumed that all of yesterday’s excitement had piled up to create that. After all, he didn’t really believe dreams to be any more than just mixed up memories.

The heat under the blankets and furs was starting to get unbearable so he decided to wake the man up. It was already morning, and he should soon start to think about getting back home. After managing to wiggle himself around he focused just on looking at his features for a moment. His nose was long and straight. The vivid blue shade of his sharp eyes was hidden, but still clear on Takumi’s mind. The angled brows were a couple shades darker than his hair, and his lashes matched that.

Takumi couldn’t help himself and lifted his hand to touch the hair. It felt silky. The unintentional wash yesterday had made it a bit wavy, falling softly to his forehead. The calm and vulnerable expression made him look much younger than before. His neck had a scar that peaked from under the blanket and didn’t fit the gentle expression at all. Takumi traced it with his finger. It was a long one, going over his collarbone and ending in the middle of the breastbone. The line was narrow and had healed with smooth edges. It was clearly from a sword. He had a few similar ones himself from training, but they weren’t nearly as long. This seemed more like a battle wound.

Takumi’s attention shifted back to his face as he started to wake up. The man frowned and his breathing fastened before he slowly opened his eyes. He blinked a few times, and finally seemed to get himself to wake up properly. His eyes widened as he looked at the man next to him, and suddenly jolted back to the wall, pulling the blankets with him. Takumi hissed as the cold air hit his suddenly exposed skin. Rather than trying to crawl back to the warmth of the bed he stood up and walked to his clothes, putting them on.

The man was still sitting on the bed, looking a bit stunned. “I… What happened last night? Why were we sleeping together?”

The shock on his face was real, and Takumi couldn’t help but to chuckle at the situation. “Nothing happened. You fell asleep right after eating, and as there is just one bed I didn’t have too many options. We had to dry our clothes and also stay warm during the night.”

“Oh... I see.”

Takumi tossed the man’s clothes to him. “Get dressed, I’ll make us something to eat.”

He went out to get some snow to boil. As he came back the man was standing his back to him, pulling his shirt down. Takumi noticed more scars crossing around his back and sides. Many were as long as the one he had touched on his shoulder. Some were still a hue of an angry red that indicated they were quite recent. It was like he had been in countless fights. A soldier, perhaps? But he seemed quite young to have been in that many battles. There hadn’t even been any big wars for decades. Who on earth was he? A brute for hire?

They ate the porridge Takumi made in silence, sipping herbal tea with it. He wanted to question the man but was hesitant because it would no doubt lead to himself being questioned too. Lying to people didn’t feel good, so not talking at all or telling only parts of the truth were options he often opted for on his trips. Luckily his companion was the one to break the silence, so he couldn’t ponder on things for too long.

“You were hunting again, right? I’m sorry to have caused you so much trouble. I imagine you would already have caught something by now without me.”

Takumi smirked to himself, thinking that he had indeed caught something, straight from the river. “I couldn’t just leave you die back there.”

“I owe my life to you. I couldn’t thank you enough.” The man bowed at him to show his gratitude, which made Takumi embarrassed. He didn’t think he had done anything that special. It was an unspoken rule that you helped anyone in need in the forests. 

Eager to swift the attention away from himself he asked the first thing that came to mind. “When we met before you were in the borderlands, but this time you are deep into the Fujiwara area. How did that happen? You are from the north, the Takahashi province, right?”

The man rubbed the back of his head, seemingly ashamed. “I got lost. One day I woke up and got up from my tent and it was snow everywhere. Clouds covered the sun and I just decided to start walking… The next day the clouds lifted, and I realized I had been walking the wrong way for a whole day. I turned and had to cross the river and well, you know the rest.”

That was indeed a possible explanation. But for anyone who knew anything about wandering the forest that wouldn’t have been a problem. It was quite easy to figure out where south was by the trees growing bigger branches on that side, as well as lichen preferring the sun of it, while moss liked the shadowy north sides. “How do you earn you living? You seem to be out of your element in here.”

The question suddenly turned him pale. “I… I fight.”

“In the army?”

He seemed to be at a loss of words. How could that be? Anyone could tell what their profession was. Unless they were trying to hide something. “More like a bodyguard… or something. I will do what is needed to keep my patrons safe.”

“No luck being hired lately then? That’s why you were hunting?”

“Yeah. I need to eat after all.”

“How old are you?”

“21 this year.”

“You seem older with that worried look.”

He looked irritated as he glanced at Takumi. “And you, how old are you? 16 or something?”

Takumi snorted. “You make fun of me but I’m only a few years younger than you. I’m 18.”

The man furrowed his brow. “I’ve never met an 18 year old hunter who talks like you. You sound more like some nobleman I’ve been hired to guard. You have no dialect like most of the people from smaller villages.”

It was Takumi’s turn to fret about what to answer. “My mom died when I was young, so I was brought up by some scholars who made a point to talk immaculately.”

“Oh… I am sorry.”

“Don’t be, you don’t have anything to do with her death.”

“My mother also passed when I was still a child, so in a way I get what you have been through.” The man stared at his hands, getting absorbed into his memories. His voice was weak as he whispered his next words. “I can still remember how warm her blood felt on my hands…”

Takumi had no idea how he was supposed to answer to that. It was clear the man had some kind of a traumatic memory he had managed to pull up. He eagerly wanted to shift the talk away from this topic, and as he laid his eyes on the sword leaning to the table he figured out how. “That sword you have. I trust you know how to use it?”

A pair of expressionless blue eyes lifted to look at him. “I wouldn’t carry it otherwise.”

“Good. Spar with me?”

His brows raised in surprise and some life flickered into his eyes. “You know how to wield a sword?”

“A bit. I had a guard teach me one winter when there was so much snow that hunting in the woods was impossible.”

It was kind of what had actually happened. The teachers had been knights, alongside his father, and the training lasted for years. But it had been mostly in the wintertime when they had less things to do. His father had also insisted that learning how to fight in difficult conditions was more rewarding. Of course he didn’t intent to reveal his skills to the man, but more hoped to draw out his skills. A lot could be learned from how a man wielded his weapon.

The man snickered. “Fine. I’m aching to work out some of my frustration anyways, and if you want to be the receiving end I won’t oppose.”

Takumi grinned. “Great. Let’s get out then, I have some sturdy sticks that I collected last spring for hunting traps that we can use in place of swords.”

*

Any knight would have been jealous of the stance the man took. His back was straight, knees a bit bend for smooth movement and his grip on the stick firm. Takumi on the other hand purposely made his stance a bit sloppy, like someone who wasn’t used to the weight of a blade on his hand. He noticed how the man looked at his too narrow stance and bent back, clearly not impressed.

Without any warning Takumi lunged forward, aiming at his opponent’s chest. He took a step to the side and easily evaded, tapping Takumi’s side instead. Exactly to the spot that he had left open and would have aimed at himself too. “You are dead.” The man said, grinning devilishly.

Takumi tried not to get too annoyed at his arrogance. He turned to face him, holding his stick in front of him again. “You attack then.”

And so he did, aiming at his neck. Takumi managed to pull his stick up, guarding himself, but didn’t react fast enough for the second attack, and ended up with a sore spot on his hip. “Again” he said sharply between his lips.

After playing around for a while Takumi was growing more and more tired of masking his talent. It was already clear to him that the man had received good teaching and had honed his skills for years. He was a worthy opponent, and Takumi craved to test his real skills against him.

Takumi was in his thoughts and so as the next blow came to his head he unconsciously corrected his stance, and swiftly blocked the stick, simultaneously taking a fast step back and launching his counterattack in a second, aiming for his shoulder. The man seemed surprised but still managed to block the attack. Takumi had anticipated that much and moved to the left with a fast half pirouette, aiming his next attack to the hand holding the stick. The man barely managed to parry it, but quickly recovered and attacked again. Takumi jumped to the right and planned to attack his side, but fate had its own plans. His worn down boots didn’t have enough grips as he stepped on clear ice under the snow. He painfully fell to his knee. His opponent faced him and for a second hesitated. That was enough. Takumi lunged his stick up and forward, hitting his stomach. “You are dead” he panted through his gritted teeth before dropping his stick and felling to his back to the ground, breathless. It had been a while since he had moved this vigorously in such a crisp air.

He was glanced down by the furious man. “Where did you learn to move like that? Have you been just playing me all this time?”

Takumi smiled sheepishly. “I guess sometimes even a blind squirrel finds the nut.”

The man seemed doubtful and for a moment stayed still, looking at him. The questions played on his lips, but he decided to ignore them, instead reaching his hand to Takumi, who took up on the offer. “You are an interesting fellow, I must admit.”

The man picked up a small twig from Takumi’s hair, who couldn’t quite grasp why he felt good hearing his words and just stared at him. His confused look clearly amused the man, who patted his shoulder, grinning “You look like I just insulted you, though it was the opposite of that.”

Warmth spread to Takumi’s cheeks as the other man smirked at him. “Coming from such a scary northern ruffian as yourself I wouldn’t be so sure.”

His grin changed into an outright laughter at that. It was a joy to see that. As if all of the misery and doubt had fallen away from his face and he finally looked his age. The laughter was contagious and soon they were both holding their sides, howling in the middle of the forest.

*

The cold had eased up during the day and the snow was turning wet as they walked towards north. Takumi had agreed to show the man a way towards his home, despite it meaning that he himself would likely arrive home a day later than planned. He could already hear Iketani’s disapproving tone on his ears but decided to ignore it for now. He would still have enough time to prepare for leaving to the King’s party, so he focused on the present moment instead.

He was teaching his companion how to navigate the forest as they walked. He seemed genuinely interested about what he was talking, and the conversation flowed naturally. It was as if they had wordlessly agreed on not asking question of each other’s past, which made it much easier for Takumi. For the first time in forever he felt like he had made a new friend. One that didn’t care about his standing as the lord’s son.

They arrived at an old road base that lead to north. It had been abandoned decades ago after some big landslides had buried some of it and rendered it useless for carriages. Still, it would lead the man to the right direction. As they stepped onto the road Takumi spoke. “This is where our ways part. I hope you can survive with the goods I gave you.”

The man patted a filled up bag on his shoulder. “You have given me more than I could have asked for. These are plenty enough for me to camp a few nights.”

“Don’t mention it.“

Takumi watched as the man waved his hand and walked away. He stood still for a moment, watching him go. His trip had certainly taken a different route from what he had planned, but he was glad of that. As the chilly air slowly started to tingle his face he reminded himself that the sooner he would get home the better. Glancing at the man’s receding back once more he too turned and started his long journey back home.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I added some tags to this work, and will probably also add some more in the future. All of the main elements should now be listed though. Hopefully you lovely readers will still find this interesting! All of the kudos and comments are still highly appreciated <3

”You are late. Give your report. Now.” A cold voice greeted Keisuke as he stepped into his father’s study. It was the same attitude he always had towards him, and he had learned to give it no thought. He had never felt close to him, him being more like a commander and a lord of his than a father. As the head of the family his word was law, and Keisuke fulfilled his orders without complaining, for the best of the family.

“The sudden change in weather slowed me down and I was unable to reach their main city. However, I did reach one of the smaller villages and managed to talk with them with the pretence of being on my way to meet some relatives. They didn’t provide me with any additional information about the Fujiwara family, and especially the son seems to be a mystery. That being said they didn’t have that many complaints of them, but I think they just wanted to be a bit overly courteous towards a stranger like me. The protection was light, only a few guards, mainly for maintaining inner peace. No measures were taken for outside invaders.”

The tall man sitting behind an old oak desk had been looking at his papers while listening to the report, but now raised his sharp glance. The grey lines in his black hair, the cold dark eyes and the stern expression made him seem unbeatable. He eyed his son from head to toe, as if checking his condition before speaking. “They are laid back as ever it seems, easy for you. Seems you managed to gather some useful information at least. Fine. Go clean up now, we are riding to the capital.”

Keisuke managed to open his mouth to ask more, but his father just waved his hand. “Dismissed. Go.” He had already turned his attention back to his papers, so Keisuke just bowed slightly and left the room. Lord Takahashi was not a man used to being second-guessed.

*

After a few days of walking non-stop and rationing food he was famished and wanted warm food more than anything else. Walking through the elaborately ornated hallways of his home, the Takahashi manor, he passed the formal dining room, but made his way straight to the kitchen. The room had mostly been collecting dust ever since his mother had died and seemingly taken the liveliness of the house with her. There were no casual dinners within the family, they mostly ate alone in different places. Keisuke himself preferred the kitchen. He had never felt like truly belonging to the main family, so the company of servants felt more calming, even when some of them seemed to be terrified of him.

The main cook, a sweet elder woman, had taken Keisuke under her wings years ago and he could count on getting something to eat from her at all times. She was like a grandmother to him, one of the two kind persons in his life. As he walked into the kitchen, a bright wide smile lightened her wrinkly face. She laid down the dough she had been kneading. “Oh, ain’t it my sweet boy! Good to see ya in decent shape, in need o’ a good bath tho’. Ya lateness gave me a worry!”

Keisuke rubbed the back of his head, embarrassed. “Well, I got into a bit of a trouble here and there…”

She reached up to pat him on the shoulder, comfortingly. “An’ I’ll have ya tell all o’ it. But first, food. Ya must be hungry. Wash ya hands and sit down.”

Keisuke did as he was told, and then sat beside the counter. He began to recount all that had happened with the hunter. She listened contently without stopping him, just putting a steaming bowl of meat soup in front of him at one point, with some freshly baked bread. Keisuke continued his story while enjoying the warmth of the food. After he finally reached the end, his patient listener spoke her thoughts.

“It sounds to me like ya finally made a friend.”

Keisuke’s cheeks heated as he put his spoon down. “I wouldn’t call him a friend, we just met. More than anything I am indebted to him.”

“There is no time requirement for how long ya havta know each other before becomin’ friends.”

That was everything she said before gently patting his hand and turning back to her cooking. Keisuke stayed in place, enjoying the warmth of the kitchen after long days in the cold, as he thought about those words. A friend… Someone he was excited about seeing again. Talking and laughing with again. He would likely be sent to the Fujiwara province again to fulfil his mission, so there was a slight possibility that they could meet. The thought almost made him smile. It was as if he… hoped for that to happen. For the first time he felt like meeting someone else than his brother or the granny could bring him joy. As he was thinking the situation through, all of his exhaustion from past days seemed to catch up on him. He rest his head on his hands and slowly drifted into sleep, with a new flicker of hope on his heart. 

*

Keisuke heard the sound of steps approaching him through his sleep, and as he could feel the person reaching his hand to his left shoulder he acted on instinct. He swiped a knife from his belt with his right hand, jumped up and grabbed the man’s collar. Before he realized who he had on his hold, he already had the knife on his throat. For a second he stared to the familiar dark blue eyes, before taking a step back and sighing. “Ryosuke. You should know better than to sneak up to me.”

His brother straightened his shirt and gave a meaningful look to the servants who had frozen in place, surprised by the sudden ruckus. Suddenly they all seemed to have something to do, and all of the kitchen cleared out. Ryosuke lifted the stool Keisuke had pushed over and sat to the one next to it. “You are right, this one was on me. I thought you would be at ease in your own home.”

Keisuke laughed dryly. “I don’t feel at ease anywhere. It’s too dangerous.”

He couldn’t read the expression that flashed on Ryosuke’s face. It was almost like… regret? But why would he feel that? It had been their father who had engraved the constant need to be aware his surroundings into Keisuke. His brother couldn’t possibly have affected the role he was given. His thoughts were cut off by a question.

“Don’t you really ever give yourself a break?”

That made Keisuke think back to his own words. Since a few days back that had really been the case, but there had indeed been a moment where he had let his guard down a bit. He sat down next to Ryosuke and slowly started to unfurl his thoughts to him.

“I… I really don’t. Expect that I did just recently. You see, on my first mission to the Fujiwara province I met this young hunter. We ended up sharing a fire for the night and had some small talk, but I left as soon as I could in the morning, without a word. A few days back, I met him again as he saved me from drowning. And please don’t ask how that happened.” Keisuke suddenly added after seeing the question dancing in his brother’s eyes.

He stayed quiet and Keisuke continued on. “He took care of me without any ulterior motives, fed me and kept me warm. I slept through the whole night for the first time in ages, in a bed with a stranger. Sure, I was exhausted from what had happened, but still. I shouldn’t have trusted him that completely. It was like I just forgot to be vary. The feeling of him not knowing anything about me or my family was so freeing. Like we could just meet as a human beings. Like we were just two acquaintances on a trip.”

Ryosuke had been listening patiently, and now analysed the situation with his usual calm. “That sounds good. You really should have someone you can relax with. I’ve been worried about that for a long time.”

Keisuke looked at his brother surprised. “Really?”

“Really. Father gave you no choice but to become a soldier for him.”

“Nor any choice to you about being the heir.”

“But that is to be expected of a firstborn son. It’s a duty I can’t run from. But you... You should be running around the capital charming ladies instead of hunting traitors or spying on people.”

“Like I could do that.”

Ryosuke let out a frustrated sigh. “Well, if all you feel good for is fulfilling your missions, how did that part go this time?”

The words made Keisuke grumpy. “Not well at all. I still only know that the heir’s name is Takumi, and how he is supposed to look, but the description fits half of the young men in the area. Even roughly to the hunter, you know? The heir doesn’t show up in parties or have any flamboyant features. The peasant really don’t know much of him. He just seems so… ordinary. It’s hard to believe that our father wants him dead.”

“It’s not about the person, but his standing. He and his father stand in the way of father’s plans.”

“I know of our father’s ambitions, but… It just feels a bit out of place. Before this the people I’ve… _dealt_ with have threatened us. They haven’t.”

Ryosuke suddenly stood up, his lips pressed into a thin line. “That seems like the case, but… Maybe he is hiding something from us? Lately he doesn’t even share his plans with me. There has been someone staying in one of the guest bedrooms, but I still don’t know who he is or why he is here. I suspect something big is about to happen.”

Keisuke followed him into the corridor. “He mentioned we would ride for the capital, but for what?”

“The solstice ball.”

“Me too? I’ve never attended those before.”

“There is a first for everything. Anyway, pack your finest outfit. And take a bath while you still can.”

Ryosuke looked at his brother’s worn down clothes and greasy hair while saying that and Keisuke couldn’t help but to smirk. “I might.”


	6. Chapter 6

Keisuke stood outside the manor, waiting for his father and brother alongside the dozen or so men appointed to travel with them. The ruthless winter wind bit down to his bones even as the sun rose to the clear sky. Keisuke moved closer to his horse, seeking some cover from the wind. The palomino mare gently pushed her head to his shoulder, and he absentmindedly patted her neck. His attention had been captured by the sight of the building. The exterior was covered with black sandstone only found in their lands, and even against the almost blinding brightness of the snow the building seemed somehow menacing. The family graveyard with its black wrought iron fences and large headstones peaked from a small hill behind the building, adding to the feeling. The present life and its inescapable end looming in the background, perfectly represented in that one sight. An unbroken cycle his family had repeated in the same grounds for centuries already. Ending up at the present moment, at him, just being an another piece of the cycle.

His thoughts didn’t exactly manage to lift his mood. As ordered he wore his black and gold armour that was embellished with the crest of the family. There rarely were any cases when he could afford to show off like that. His blonde hair attracted attention as it was, hence why he preferred to cover it with a hood. Now, combined with the shining armour and the crest of the most powerful province of the lands, he could not travel unnoticed anywhere. What a dread to someone who usually walked in the shadows.

Suddenly a servant swung open the great doors of the manor. The lord and his son walked out, dressed in similar armour as Keisuke, but with even more gold embellishments. They looked alike with their black hair and similar build. Clearly a father and his son, unlike Keisuke who took after his mother and so didn’t seem to fit into the family he had left. He watched as they walked to their horses and started to lead the group on. Patting his mare for one last time he got up in the saddle and galloped to the front of the pack to scout the road ahead of them.

*

Their journey had been peaceful so far, but as they got closer to the capital dark clouds gathered in the horizon. Keisuke pulled the reins, stopping his mare to gaze at the menacing sight. The clouds seemed to reach the land on the fields ahead of him. There was a snowstorm coming. Suddenly a pale light crossed the sky, and a few seconds later he heard the unmistakable sound. His heart dropped. Thundersnow. A rare but powerful type of winter storms, combining the destructivity of both a snowstorm and thunder. The wind blew to his face, meaning they were directly on its path. It wouldn’t be too long before it would be on top of the travellers. Keisuke turned his mare and rushed back to the others. They would have to camp as soon as possible.

Luck was on their side at least for a bit, as they were just riding through a forest. The large trees would cover them a bit and provide support to the tents too. Just a moment more of travelling and they would have been in the middle of the fields, taking in the full force of the storm. Keisuke helped the men put up the tent for his family, and a few other to the soldiers. As he was pulling a thick blanket over his mare the first snowflakes dropped. They felt like shards of ice on his face, but the horses didn’t seem to mind. They were used to living outside even through the rough northern winters. He just made sure they couldn’t escape and headed to the tent.

Inside was a whole other world. A stove radiated warmth all over, and most of the outside noises were muffled by the thick layers of pelts and fabrics forming the walls. Sturdy poles hold everything in place, only shivering a bit every now and then on the wind. A table had been set up, with a large paper covering it. Ryosuke sat opposite their father, both looking at the map on the table and discussing something. The lord noticed his younger son and waved for him to join them.

Keisuke walked over to the table and looked down. It was a map of the kingdom and its provinces, with most of the areas marked with small black stones. A few had grey stones, and two had red ones. One in the capital and one in the Fujiwara province. Keisuke didn’t quite grab their meaning. “What is this?”

His brother responded. “Black are allies, grey have not yet decided their standing and red are enemies.”

“Huh? Who is the red one in the capital?”

Their father answered that with a cunning smile on his lips. “The King. I thought to deal with him last but instead he graciously decided to invite us to his own funeral.”

Keisuke’s eyes widened as he heard that. Deep in his mind he had always assumed the day when his father would try to take over the King would come, but what did he mean by those exact words? Next to him Ryosuke seemed to have a similar reaction, but he managed to express his thoughts out loud. “Now? I thought we needed the Fujiwara province’s iron resources to build up our armoury first.”

“That had been the plan, but things changed. This opportunity is too good to let go. I gained the trust of other lords faster than I had predicted. As the King has no heir of his own yet, nor living relatives, one of the lords will success him if he dies now. It’s likely they all back me up. We have the biggest area, and many need our imports. What is even better is that we have the perfect man for the job. A former servant of the castle, sworn to take revenge of the King who cut his tongue for flirting with the maidens of the court. He can’t talk.”

That must be the same man who had been using the guest room, and of whom his brother had known nothing of, Keisuke suddenly realized. Their father had indeed had a plan, and a much more influential one than they could have dreamed of.

“I have a hunch this man still won’t walk away alive from this.” Ryosuke said dryly.

“Correct. Always tie all loose ends.”

Their father turned to look at Keisuke. “Your job in the ball is to find out more about the Fujiwara heir. The damned old man seems to guard him too closely to find out anything through spying, so we need to take most out of this opportunity. Their land is our next goal, and we need all of the information that we can gather. He is the perfect target; you are about the same age so just befriend him.”

Keisuke nodded stiffly but couldn’t help but to notice how his father had referred to the other lord. It was as if he hold a grudge against him. Such slip on his polished act was rare. His thoughts were interrupted as a loud strike of thunder hit right above the tent, shaking the poles. The storm had reached them in full power.

*

The road had been covered in a thick layer of snow, slowing them down. When they finally reached the capital it was already the day of the ball. Keisuke looked around the city brimming with life. Solstice was one of the most important days of the year, marking the middle of the winter. It seemed like everybody was out on the streets. Merchants haggled with their customers loudly and bakeries spread around the delicious smell of yule cakes. In the midst of all pickpockets carefully moved from a target to an another, and escort girls flirted with men, trying to earn a living. Keisuke saw one such woman, surrounded by a few men trying to get her attention. She had deep green eyes and fiery red hair, such rarity was bound to attract attention. As Keisuke looked, their eyes grossed and she winked to him. He ignored the hint and turned his gaze forward. 

The King’s castle was more of a fortress really, looming behind the city. The castle had been built in an island in the middle of a roaring river that never froze. The walls rose straight from the waters, making it impossible for any intruders to climb them. The only way in was the wooden bridge that was lowered only when the guards deemed it fit. Inside the walls was everything needed for surviving even a long blockade. Gardens grew fruits and vegetables. Herds of lambs and rabbits were kept in the pens, eating weeds and leftovers from the kitchens. The barracks had a considerable large armoury and housed the King’s private soldiers. Above all rose the castle, the light grey stone fitting the colour of the clouds. The servants lived in the lower floors, and the King and his court in the parts that almost touched the sky.

Their entourage had been expected and they were welcomed by a group of guards, stable boys and other servants. Keisuke paid attention to their expressions as they first laid eyes to his father and brother who rode at the front and stopped in front of the stables. Most looked at them with respect, some almost adoring. A few of the maids blushed and giggled behind their hands, their eyes focused on his brother. A usual reaction there too.

Keisuke halted his mare behind them and jumped to the ground. One of the maids turned to look at the movement, and as her eyes landed on Keisuke’s hair they widened. She tugged the hand of the one next to her, and suddenly all of the castle’s people were staring at him, various levels of wonder on their faces. The ruckus died down as they kept looking at him. Ignoring the stares he started to walk towards his father and brother who were getting down from their horses. However, one of the stable boys in the crowds captured his attention. He was pale and shivering. As Keisuke’s eyes caught his glare he quickly made a cross sign with his hands and whispered “Aurum in morte”.

Keisuke froze mid-step as he heard that. The words were clearly directed to him, even though he had never heard them before, and didn’t understand their meaning. As he still stared to the eyes of the boy something connected in his mind. An unfortunate victim on one of his first missions, a servant boy who had happened to see him deal with his master, and thus had also become a target. The blood on his face as he drew his last breath and closed his eyes. The same eyes that were now looking straight at him. It seemed impossible, but… his brother? A sharp pain pierced through his head, making him bent over a bit and press his hand to it. No, no, no. He didn’t want to remember this now. He needed to focus on the current situation.

He heard a few quick steps approaching him and looked up. Ryosuke gently touched his shoulder. “Are you all right?”

“Yeah, it’s fine.” Keisuke grunted and straightened his back, trying his best to look calm.

“Come on then, father is watching.”

*

As soon as they reached the rooms assigned to them and the servants had left his father turned to look at Keisuke with furious expression. “What was that down there? You are not allowed to show any weakness in front of others, and you know it.”

Keisuke stiffly bowed. “Please excuse it just this once, I’ll take care to behave properly in the future.”

He could feel his father staring up and down to him, judging what to do. “Fine. If this happens again you won’t escape without a punishment. I expect results tonight. Go get ready.”

Keisuke bowed even deeper before turning back to go to his room. He caught a glimpse of his brother, who looked at him with furrowed brows, but didn’t say anything.

As the door closed behind him, he finally let down his act. Leaning to the door he slowly sat to the floor, pressing both of his hands firmly to his aching head. He had managed to push the memories to the back of his mind, but now let them flow through his mind. After the initial shock of remembering he now began to recollect more of the situation. The target had been trying to gather farmers in their lands to rebel against the taxes. It had been a rough year when frost took half of the crops. Still, they needed to give their part in exchange of the lands they cultivated. To prevent an outright chaos his father had send Keisuke to deal with the main agitator, effectively erasing the problem as others had quieted down after their leader passed. His father had been pleased, but Keisuke had never told him about the servant. It had been a mistake he regretted, and now all of his quilt had resurfaced.

Sighing deeply Keisuke slowly got up. In the past he had managed to bury the quilt while roaming through the woods, focusing on the nature and it’s peacefulness. The castle was about as far from wild nature as it could be, but at least there were the gardens. There was still enough time for a small walk before the sun would set and he had to get ready for the night. His room had a door to the terrace, and from there a way straight to the orchard so he wouldn’t have to face anyone.

He got rid of his armour and changed into a long cloak. Pulling the hood to his head he immediately felt better. As he hurried out and got under the cherry trees his headache slowly started to ease. There were no people to be seen, all were inside, preparing for the night. He followed a path through the lines of trees, ending up to a decorative gazebo. The walls of the castle were nearest to the water right there, opening to a spectacular sight of icy silver river and snow-covered woods alongside both sides of it. Small lines of smoke came from the cottages here and there. The main city was on the other side of the castle and far fewer people lived near the river.

Keisuke walked to the edge, staring down to the river. The surface was only about five meters down from where he stood. The wall only reached up to his tights, left purposefully low to allow the sight to be seen. Water swirled around the stone walls. It looked almost soft, the white peaks like cream on top of the waves. He allowed his mind to be mesmerized with the constantly changing patterns, forgetting his grieves. Instead his mind started to wander. The river was so near that leaping into it wouldn’t be fatal. What it would be like to let go of everything, to be swept away with the water? Might a different life wait for him on the other side of the journey?

A lone crow circled over the river, cawing loudly, bringing Keisuke out of his trance. He glared at the dark figure flowing in the air. Crows were hated by many, seen as bad omens of death and misery. Sometimes even hunted down for that. Keisuke didn’t believe in the myths but couldn’t help but to somehow relate to the bird. The path his father had planned for him was one covered in darkness and loathing from other people. Still, he had no idea what he might have been doing if it wasn’t for that. At least now he worked in the best interest of his family, which was everything a son of a nobility should aim for in any way.

The sun set behind the horizon, and a blue hue covered everything. Keisuke caught the last glimpse of the bird as it headed south to the woods. Rubbing his cold hands against each other he turned back to the castle. He would have to be on his best act for the night, and in a way he was excited to finally see the one he had been trying to find information of for months already.

*

The grand hall of the castle was filled with people from all of the provinces. Amongst them stood Keisuke, tugging the tight collar of his jacket. Formal clothes were not something he enjoyed wearing. The silk felt smooth to his skin, but he still preferred the comfort of leather and wool to that. The rich gold embroidered swirls made the black fabric stiffer and heavier. He looked at the colours, and the bridge emblem on his chest. The marks of the Takahashi family. Anyone attending would be able to tell who he was, and his hair only attracted more attention. It had been ages since he had been in this kind of gathering as an invited quest. Usually he wore only black and sneaked in corners, but this day was different. He needed to be seen so that anything that was going to happen couldn’t be associated with the family.

Ryosuke walked to him, looking like he was born to wear the clothes. “Quit fretting, you look like you don’t want to be here.”

“I’m trying but this goddam jacket is just so uncomfortable.”

“You’ll get used to it once you wear it for long enough. Have you learned anything yet?”

“No. And I hope I don’t have to wear this for that long.”

Ryosuke smiled crookedly. “Let’s hope that you catch the boy soon then.”

Keisuke managed to keep the snarky comebacks he had ready unsaid, instead starting to circle around the hall. He was greeted by people here and there, which was no surprise as most wanted to be in good terms with his family. He tried to keep the talks as short as possible, constantly eyeing the mass of people for a glimpse of violet and silver, the colours of the Fujiwara family. Midnight was closing in and it was almost the time for the King’s speech.

As he was politely answering the greetings of some nobleman straight under his father he finally found what he was looking. A young man, facing towards him about ten meters away, talking to a petite woman. He was wearing a similar style of jacket that Keisuke had, but with different colours and less embroidery. He saw the crest on his chest and was sure that it had to be the Fujiwara heir himself. Finally in front of his eyes. Quickly excusing himself from the man, who still kept talking, Keisuke slowly started to walk towards his target.

The man was looking downwards to the woman, and Keisuke couldn’t get a good look at his face, but there was something bothering him. The colour and length of his hair. His built. Why was it so familiar? Unexpectedly the man raised his head, looking around the room as if he was trying to find someone. It took a second before Keisuke realized what he was seeing.

_He knew him._


	7. Chapter 7

A single drop of sweat tickled its way down Takumi’s back. The hall was heated by thousands of lit candles and all of the people attending, making the air musty. The constantly babbling girl had been glued to him ever since he had walked through the doors of the hall. She was a beauty with large brown eyes and silky chestnut hair but had nothing interesting to say. All she talked about were things like her new gown, or how his father had brought exotic sweets from faraway lands. She had rouged her cheeks and was trying to be bashful by hiding behind her sleeve every time she let out a high-pitched giggle. His silence didn’t seem to bother her, as she kept on going nevertheless, clearly determined to charm herself a well-off husband and lead an easy life, as she had until now. Unfortunately for Takumi a future lord with no competing siblings was the perfect deal for that. He couldn’t have been less interested. The idea of having to marry someone with whom he couldn’t even have a meaningful conversation with was dreadful. These kind of things had been happening to him since childhood, which hadn’t exactly helped with his dislike of social gatherings. 

Desperately looking for a way to escape the situation he scanned the room. It was just finely dressed people talking everywhere, trying to impress the ones with better standing, or politely listening to the ones doing so. In the vibrant mass of people dressed in their family colours his eyes suddenly caught a glimpse of something golden. Soft hair hit by candlelight that made it gleam, completed by the matching ornaments of the jacket. The eyes of pure sapphire shining as they looked straight at him, wide open. It was as if all noise suddenly ceased in Takumi’s mind as he comprehended what he was seeing and froze in place.

The man from the woods. But… It couldn’t be. He was just some random mercenary that had happened to be out there, hunting food for his family. How could _he_ have ended up in the king’s ball? Had someone hired him for protection? But why would anyone do so, this was about the safest place imaginable. Thoughts ran through Takumi’s mind as he desperately tried to make sense of the situation, and finally realized something. The colours the man wore clearly stated his position as a part of the Takahashi province, but not just any regular underling. The lavish use of gold thread and even some jewels in his clothing could only mean he was someone in a position of power. High nobility or… even the main family. Thinking back to his actions he hadn’t really wanted to talk about himself, not even tell his name. Just as Takumi hadn’t. Had it been just unfriendliness, or had he been trying to hide something?

Frantically digging through his mind for a clue Takumi still stood in place, his eyes locked with the man. He couldn’t be the heir of the Takahashi province; he ought to have black hair like his father. But did the lord have an another son? Takumi slightly furrowed his brows in frustration. He should have paid more attention on learning about the noble families of the realm. But if he indeed were a son of the lord… maybe they had something in common, the same social standing. A way to be friends openly. That would be the first such person near Takumi. Someone of similar age who wouldn’t be conscious about his standing in every moment.

Remembering the pure joy they had shared after their stick fight the idea started to seem too intriguing. As if a string had been attached to Takumi he slowly moved towards the man, barely remembering to mutter an excuse to the girl before leaving her. Their eye contact didn’t break even as he weaved his way through the crowd. Taking the final step he halted in front of the man. It was as if neither of them knew what to do in this unforeseen situation. Before Takumi could decide what he wanted to know first, the silence was broken by the man. His expression had changed from surprised to almost pained, as he sighed out a single word, a name. “Takumi.”

He raised his brow. It was no surprise someone of the nobility would know his name, but how he had said it felt too personal. “And you are?”

The man stayed silent for a second. He shifted his eyes to the floor, collecting himself. As he lifted his stare back up, it was as if he had buried all of the emotions he had just showed a moment before. His voice was nonchalant as he answered. “Keisuke.”

“Takahashi?”

“Yes.”

He was not giving in easily then. Not that he had been super talkative in the woods, but it was as if all of the connection they had established there was lost. His demeanour was icy, as if he was angry. What on earth was the deal with him? Takumi tried to push a bit more. “And what are you to lord Takahashi?”

Keisuke hesitated slightly and his eyes got harsher. Still, he answered. “Second son.”

Before Takumi managed to react to that they were interrupted by a trumpet, and a servant announcing the arrival of the King. All of the people in the hall turned to look and bowed as a greeting. The disruption gave him some time to think about what he had just learned. A son of lord Takahashi had been lurking in the forests of the Fujiwara province. How come? What motive he could have for that, and could it be the reason behind the sudden change in his act? They straightened up from their bows as the King began his speech, but Takumi didn’t listen the words. There was something more important. Turning back to Keisuke he asked him “What were you doing in the forest, really?”

He was completely expressionless as he answered. “I was hunting.”

“I doubt your family has ever needed _you_ specifically to hunt for them.”

That seemed to amuse him in some dark way. “And you, what were you doing there?”

Takumi paused for a moment before answering. “I was hunting.”

They looked at each other. Even as the words they had used were the same, they clearly had very different meanings behind them.

Suddenly a loud scream echoed from the front of the room. The calm talk of the King had stopped. Takumi turned to look and saw a scene he had never thought possible. A single dagger stuck out of the King’s chest, a red stain rapidly spreading through the white fabric around it. His look was astonished as he stared down. Suddenly he collapsed and the screams grew louder.

Lord Takahashi was there, running to the King, looking horrified. He yanked the dagger off, tore his own jacket and tried to press the fabric to the wound to stop the bleeding. On the left side of the room the King’s guards tackled the attacker. One of them hit him with his armoured hand, making his head flop back, resulting in him losing consciousness. He was dressed as a servant. No wonder they hadn’t been paying too much attention to him.

Takumi heard lord Takahashi spoke the words “The King has died” which shook up all of the realm, and everything he was accustomed to, and his heart dropped. For a moment everything went so silent you could have heard a pin dropping, until the people around them started to react. Some cried, some started to yell at the guards, some just stared the situation with disbelief on their faces, too shocked to do anything. Takumi turned back to Keisuke. His eyes were still focused on him, as if the events in the front were not significant enough for him to look. As he glanced into Keisuke’s cold eyes he suddenly felt chills down his spine.

Unexpectedly Bunta came from behind Takumi, tapping his shoulder. “Are you all right?”

Takumi looked at his father and nodded, and as he turned back to Keisuke he was nowhere to be seen. It was as if he had disappeared into thin air. Takumi was left baffled. Who on earth was he really, and what did he have to do with all of this?

*

Intricate formations of snow and ice decorated the garden where Takumi sat, eyeing a book. The wind didn’t hit the area surrounded by high walls, making the coldness bearable. After long days inside it actually felt refreshing. Iketani stood near him in watch, but other than that he had the whole place to himself. A month had passed from the solstice and after the mourning period the process of selecting a new king was now ongoing. All of the nobles were on their toes, and hence Takumi had also ended up with a bodyguard following him everywhere. The hitman had been caught on the act and thrown into the dungeon but found dead the next morning. It was still unclear if he had died from the guards’ beating, or if someone had sneaked down to finish him off. He had had a grudge against the King, and it seemed like he had worked alone. Still, Takumi found it hard to believe he would have managed to get so far by himself. Someone had to have helped him. Someone with enough power to hide that. And he had his doubts.

He sighed and closed the book he remembered nothing of, despite looking at it for an hour. He yearned to get to the woods again. Away from all the people suspecting and monitoring each other, waiting for the selection to be completed just to find out whose feet they would lick next. The only person he would have wanted to talk to had vanished somewhere. He had tried to find him, but it seemed like had become one with the shadows. The contrast between his act in the woods and in the ball was just too significant, leaving Takumi to wonder which was the real one, and why he had changed so suddenly. The questions burned on his mind, but there was no outlet for them.

He raised his eyes to the sky. The sun was setting, painting the sky a vivid red. A bad omen of blood to be spilled the next day if you listened to old wives’ tales, but nothing more than a sign of one more wasted day ending in Takumi’s mind. He stood up and headed to chambers designated to his family. Hopefully his father would have some news of how the process was moving on.

The familiar scent of tobacco greeted Takumi as he opened the door. His father sat on the decorative armchair, smoking his old pipe and looking very much out of place. The style of the castle was much more elaborate than their manor, which focused more on practicality. Takumi sat opposite to an identical chair and winced at how uncomfortable it managed to be. He would not have hesitated a second to chop it up into firewood if this was his home.

Nothing good came off rushing his father, so Takumi just sat there in silence, waiting for him to tell about the situation. It took a while but finally Bunta spoke. “The vote is tomorrow morning, but the results are clear already.”

Takumi raised his brow. “So lord Takahashi it is, then?”

“Yes.”

He hadn’t had a strong opinion of the man himself but given how he had met his son, and how cold he had become after learning his identity made him wonder about the lord’s motives. He had already explained the situation with Keisuke to his father, so he just spoke his thoughts.

“He seems capable, but… I wonder if this is all his doing. It all just plays into his hand so perfectly.”

Bunta knocked the ash out from his pipe and laid it into the table. “The lord is a cunning man. Undoubtedly capable of running the country, but gruesome on his actions.”

“Have you known him for long?”

“We were acquainted as young men.”

They sat in silence for a moment, and Takumi realized his father wouldn’t tell anything more. Knowing that pressuring him wouldn’t yield anything, he stood up to go to his room. Suddenly his father added “We will leave as soon as the coronation is held, pack your things.”

Takumi nodded. Finally something was about to happen, be it for better or worse.

*

The majority of the lords voted for lord Takahashi as the new king of the country. Some, Bunta included, voted for empty as they didn’t fully support this, but didn’t have any other candidate either. The voting was anonymous, but Takumi still got the impression that lord Takahashi knew exactly who hadn’t supported him and had his eyes on them.

An unusually warm wind had changed the snowfall into rain, making everything grey and gloomy. It was as if the nature was still mourning the late king, who had met his demise among the ones he trusted. The lords and their heirs now gathered to the hall to solemnise the new ruler, all wearing light grey robes instead of the ornate uniforms they had used on the ball. The old throne had been tarnished by blood, and a new one had been made as fast as possible. It was a glorious piece of carpentry with its ornate spirals and flowers, all covered in gold. The cushion was black as night, matching the also new drapes on the wall behind. The colours of the Takahashi family now covered the whole hall instead of the traditional white and bronze of the kings. The new King had been decided the very morning, but it was as if he had started to prepare for it well in advance. 

A loud horn broke the silence as the tall doors opened and the new King walked in. Takumi’s eyes were not on him, but in the figure walking behind. Keisuke. Now the second prince of their nation, his standing marked by the delicate black headband decorated with gold circling his head. The crown prince wore the same style of band, but in opposing colours. It was the insignia of a prince, as the crown was the King’s. Takumi tried to catch his eyes, but he refused to look anywhere but his father’s back. Those few days they had spent in the woods felt like a lifetime ago.

The King sat down, his sons kneeling in front of him. He spoke loudly, with no hesitation in his voice. “I have been elected the King among lords, so the control of my province will be moved to the next person in line, Ryosuke. As a lord of the largest province, I now ask him to start this ceremony by swearing his loyalty to me.”

Ryosuke stood while Keisuke remained kneeled next to him. He placed his right hand to his heart as he said the words. “I will pledge my loyalty to the King. I will fight in his honour and use my position only to his advantage.”

The King didn’t show any emotion as he accepted the pledge. He waved and his sons moved in position to both sides of his throne. “As you know, he is my son, and as such also the crown prince to this nation. However, he is also one of the lords and I’ll promise to handle him the same way as any other of you. Ruling his own province is an invaluable experience to him.”

The other lords bowed slightly, and the ceremony continued. Bunta was the last one to be called, as their province was the smallest of all. The King had kept a neutral expression through the whole situation, but Takumi noticed it changing just the tiniest bit as he laid eyes to the kneeling lord in front of him. It almost seemed like mockery. “Old friend. Wouldn’t have thought this day to come, would you?”

“I always believed you to be a very capable man.”

Before the King had time to answer back Bunta made his pledge as the other lords had. As he was given permission to rise up, he spoke again. “I beg your permission to leave the castle now.”

“Without attending the coronation party?”

“I am afraid so. The ride to my province is a long one, and I am needed there as soon as possible.”

The King smiled a bit crookedly. A seemingly friendly gesture, but somehow threatening at the same time. “Fine. You are excused for now, lord Fujiwara.”

Bunta bowed as he said his thanks and walked back. Takumi followed him but couldn’t resist one last look to Keisuke. Finally their eyes met for a moment, but there was nothing. No friendliness at all, it was just as it had been in the ball. He was like a stranger, a man to be wary of.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi there, and thanks for reading, as always! I was actually planning to upload this chapter last weekend, but was too busy. Though I ended up adding about 1000 words thanks to going it through with time, so I guess that was a win xD I am aiming to keep on uploading frequently, but I'm also writing my master's thesis now, so that can sometimes disturb important things like this lol. Anyways, I hope you enjoy and leave kudos or comments if you have any thoughts! I always love to hear those.

_Rain poured down from the sky, melting the thick blanket of snow that had accumulated during winter. Wind blew from the south, carrying a touch of spring with it. Takumi raised his face to the sky, closing his eyes and focusing on the feeling of cold water dripping down. He was at the clearing where he had seen Keisuke for the first time, far away from everything. At that moment he finally felt distant from all that had gone awry ever since the solstice ball. His mind had been going on circles, trying to make sense of everything, and most of all the man in the centre of it. But none of that mattered right now. There was only him and the silence of the woods._

_Even that moment of serenity was cut short, as the unmistakable sound of a wolf howling in near distance pierced the air. Takumi opened his eyes, swiping the damp hair away from his face. And there it was, a wolf bigger than he had ever seen. Black as night, with sharp golden eyes that stared right at him from the other side of the clearing, nailing him in place. Neither of them moved, but suddenly he saw something in the woods. Shadowy figures running, the sound of clanking metal exposing them as soldiers even before they emerged to the clearing. The wolf stood still even as the soldiers run past him, straight to Takumi, who still couldn’t move. As the first soldiers almost reached him with their lances and swords he was suddenly pulled back by someone. As he fell back to the snow he only saw a glimpse of a black cloak swinging past him._

Takumi flinched up in his bed, woken up by the feeling of falling down. He was cold, as if he had really been out in the snow, but there was a more rational explanation to that. He had kicked his blanket away, and the window that he surely had closed was now open. Getting up from the bed he grabbed the blanket from the floor and wrapped it over his shoulders as he headed to the window that was clanking in the wind. He winced as his bare feet hit the water that had rained in. The weather was just as it had been on his dream, the smell of spring lingering in the air despite there still being quite a lot of snow. He reached for the window and closed it, leaning his forehead to the cool glass as he shut his eyes and thought of the dream. It had been ages since he had had a decent night’s sleep, and even the short moment of calm in his sleep had felt unbelievably good. He had always been someone whose dreams vividly reflected the things going around his mind, but this was getting out of hand. Ever since the ball he had been dreaming of soldiers running around, of the king dying, of Keisuke. The dreams always left him feeling frustrated. He had no idea how he would react if he were to see Keisuke again, or whether he should really be wary of him. What on earth was he to him even?

The recent news of unusual movements around their lands didn’t exactly help him calm down. A hunter had discovered remainings of a camp of dozens of men in the forests near the border. The woodcutters had come across arrows stuck on the trees, as if they had been used for target practice. In the border villages women whispered of unknown men lurking around and kept their children inside. In contrast to the activity in their area, there hadn’t been any word from the capital. It was as if the King didn’t want anything to do with them. All of the things combined felt like a message, and the occurrences only grew more frequent by the day. Takumi stood still for a moment longer, not sure of what to do. The sunrise was still a few hours away, but he couldn’t fall asleep again. Tossing the blanket to his bed he reached for his clothes and made his way to the training quarters.

By the time the sun rose Takumi had managed to calm his mind by beating up the straw dummies. He had worked up a sweat and was starting to get hungry. Deciding to go for one more round he changed his hold of the dull training sword from one hand to both. He took a deep breath and focused. Everything else faded as he concentrated on the dummy. He took a few quick steps, and then suddenly changed his direction to the right, swinging the sword simultaneously to the neck of the dummy. For a second he thought about how he had sparred with Keisuke on the woods. A second later his blade hit the neck, sending the straw head flying. He froze as he followed the piece flow through air, hit the floor, and roll towards the door. He couldn’t help but to think of Keisuke again. Was he really that angry with him that he could have done that to him too? If it were a real fight he might not have any other choice. The sword dropped from his hand, and he covered his face. What on earth was he thinking? At what point had his life become such a mess?

“Has it gotten that bad?”

The question shook Takumi and he raised his eyes to Iketani, who now stood by the door, holding the separated head on his hands. Takumi stared at it, the pale yellow colour not helping his imagination to calm down at all, as it reminded him of certain someone’s hair. He sighed and grouched down to get the sword before answering. “Yeah, I couldn’t sleep again.”

“Did you try the tea the healer gave you?”

“It didn’t work.”

Takumi took the sword back to the rack alongside the other ones and washed his face in the barrel of water next to them. Iketani tossed a towel to him and spoke. “There was yet an another report of movements this morning, but I don’t know the details. The situation has us all on the edge.”

Takumi though about the situation. There had to be something he could do. Suddenly a growl of his stomach reminded him of the fact that he had not yet eaten anything, and it was about the time he did. “I’ll ask more of it while I get my breakfast.”

The knight nodded and went on to replace the dummy that Takumi had decapitated. He glanced it once more, a bit surprised he had actually managed to do that with a blunt blade. It seemed like the extra time he had spend training was paying off.

*

As Takumi got into the dining hall, his father was already there, listening to one of the guards. Takumi sat down, filling his plate, and listening to the guard as well. It seemed there had been sightings of soldiers camping near the village closest to their border. After he was done, Bunta send the guard away. He took a sip of his tea and began to fill his pipe. As he finished that and lit it, he turned to look at his son.

“What do you think of this?”

Takumi spun a small winter apple on his hands, thinking about the question. “I… I have to go see for myself. This is all too odd.”

His father thought about his words for a moment before answering. “Take Iketani with you.”

Takumi opened his mouth to argue that he would be more discreet alone, but Bunta seemed to read his mind. “The silence of the King and all of these movements might be connected. We need the information, but you might run into trouble on the way. Two pairs of hands can do more than one.”

He couldn’t disagree with that, so he just accepted. “Fine. We’ll leave as soon as possible. It’ll take a few days to reach the village.”

Bunta nodded and picked up a letter that had been laying on the table. He frowned as he read it. Even more news of odd sightings, most likely. Takumi didn’t stay to hear about that, as his head was already filled with excitement of actually getting to go somewhere.

*

Takumi usually preferred walking over riding because it made him freer. Nevertheless, this time the trip was not about relaxing and exploring the woods. In fact, relaxation was about the last thing on his mind as the mood of the familiar path was somehow off. As a lone crow flew over them, cawing loudly it hit him. The birds were missing. Instead of the lively concerts welcoming spring they had been listening to the oppressive silence for a moment now. The area felt deserted. Usually a large predator like a bear or a pack of wolves could have caused that, but it felt unlikely. Bears should still be hibernating, and wolves would have let out a howl or two. That made the most dangerous possibility feel like the most likely. Humans.

Takumi carefully observed the area around them. The only movement was from wind playing with the branches of the trees. He signalled for Iketani to catch up to him, and carefully moved his hunting bow from his back to his hands.

“What is it?” The knight asked in a low voice.

“Do you notice how quiet it is? People must have been here just recently and might still be. Be ready for anything, we are almost to the village.”

Iketani nodded and also pulled his bow to his hand. They rode in silence. Takumi was glad he had chosen to wear his leather armour for once. It wouldn’t be enough to fully stop arrows, but at least the hardened material would make them bounce away if the hit wasn’t direct.

Suddenly something caught his attention. The path they had been riding on hadn’t been used in while, as the snow that had suddenly rained down the day before was untouched. However, a line of footprints crossed over it before them. Takumi looked around, and as he saw nothing he stopped his horse. Giving the reins to Iketani he said “Keep an eye out for anything” before jumping down.

He kept an arrow on the string of his bow as he walked over to the tracks, inspecting them more closely. Instead of the light footprints peasants would leave with their felt or leather boots these were way deeper. Soldiers in full armour. Judging by the number of prints maybe around twenty of them. Takumi furrowed as he looked around. Who were they, and why were they here? Something on the spikes of the blackberry bush near the tracks caught his attention. He carefully picked it up. A piece of golden thread. He stared at it for a moment, before turning back to Iketani. “Let’s pick up the pace.”

Wind changed direction as they continued on, and with it something pale landed on his horse’s dark mane. Takumi wiped it and rubbed the substance between his fingers in wonder. “Ash?”

At the same moment the scent caught up. A clear smell of burning wood. Had the soldiers camped somewhere near? Takumi considered it for a second but felt that a simple campfire wouldn’t be enough to send ash flying around like that. He was even more confused of what was going on as he once more picked up the pace and rode towards the village, Iketani following his lead in silence.

*

Not even his wildest thoughts could have prepared Takumi for what he was seeing. As they rode out of the forest into the fields surrounding the village a grim sight greeted them. The village was in ashes. A black, still smoking wound on the snowy lands. Takumi pulled the reins, making his mount halt. The gray mare jerked its head around and took some restless steps as the smell of smoke really hit them. Takumi was at loss for words, staring at the sight before him in silence.

“Look” Iketani said and pointed to the fields north from the ruins. A mass of soldiers had built their camp there. There were around a few hundred of them. The black and golden banners of house Takahashi flapped in the wind, alongside the white and bronze ones of the King.

Takumi’s eyes widened as he saw those. This was so much more serious than what he had even dared to think. This was an outright declaration of war against them, by the King himself. The one who should always protect the peace on his realm. A fire sparked in Takumi’s mind. They had no right to do this.

He slowly ushered his horse onwards to the village, Iketani following behind, trying to convince him otherwise. “Stop! We can’t go there, who knows how many of them still wander in the ruins.”

Takumi turned back to look at him. “I have to know what happened to the villagers.”

Iketani saw the determination in his eyes and knew that there was no turning his head. “Fine. We go check that, but leave the second anything threatens us, right? I have to answer to your father if anything goes wrong.”

Takumi continued on without answering and Iketani sighed deeply. In what kind of trouble he would get them this time? Trying to do his best at his job was tough on regular days, but even more so now. Rushing his horse on he moved next to Takumi.

*

They rode through what had been the main road of the village. Some of the logs were still smoking, telling that the fire had most likely raged through the night. There were no signs of bodies, but no villagers to be seen anywhere, either. Had they been taken captive or perhaps fled to the woods?

The mood in the ruins was oppressive. The horses were restless, and it took some force to make them keep going instead of running away. Takumi looked at the remains of houses he had so often visited. There had lived a merchant who gladly bought pelts from him. In that corner the old granny from whom he purchased herbs and spices. All of that was now gone.

As they turned on the corner to see the largest house of the village that had been used by the village chief, they finally saw something living. Two horses, a white stallion, and a palomino mare with a white blaze on her face. Next to them a man in black armour grouched in the ground, looking at something. His back was to them, but obviously he was with the Takahashi forces. Iketani tried to signal Takumi to turn back, but he ignored him. As the horses noticed each other they let out some neighs. The sudden noise alerted the man, making him straighten up and turning to them.

He was no ordinary soldier, but the crown prince himself. In his hand he held a violet flag with the Fujiwara emblem. The light colour was soiled by black mud, and the edges were rugged as the fabric had been teared from its pole. The sight made anger burn on Takumi’s mind, and his hand gravitated towards the handle of his sword. They would have to pay for this.

Suddenly someone moved to the light from the shadows he had been lurking in, his bow ready to fire at any moment. His light hair shined against the black background, and he spoke in a voice painfully familiar to Takumi. “Move that hand an inch more and you’ll end up with an arrow on your neck.”

Takumi met his gaze. Had this been his plan all along? At that moment he felt like the man would really deserve the same fate as the straw dummy had on the morning few days back. With all of his anger and disappointment Takumi hissed his name. “Keisuke.”

The man in question didn’t answer, and for a moment no one moved. It was Ryosuke who finally broke it. “Keisuke, put the bow down. There is no need for that right now.”

He clearly hesitated but decided to listen to his brother and moved next to him from where he had been. Takumi watched them and managed to finally arrange his thoughts enough to ask the burning question. “At what right are you here, destroying our villages?”

Ryosuke answered that. “The King’s. The area is no longer yours.”

He proceeded to tug a leather case from his belt, and threw it to Takumi, who caught it without trouble. Inside was a single sheet of paper. He read it, and all of the blood rushed down from his face. It was a royal order, signed by the King and the other lords. The Fujiwara province had been moved under the Takahashi one, making Ryosuke the lord of both. Takumi raised his stare to him. “This is ridiculous, we won’t accept this.”

“Then you leave us no choice but to invade the lands with force, like what happened here.” He gestured to the burned area around them. “But we are gracious enough to give you some time. In a week from now come with the lord and surrender, and we won’t move on from here.”

Takumi looked at him with astonishment. How did he dare to suggest that they would just do that. He almost jumped down from his horse, just to run over and punch the bastard, but Iketani managed to stop him by holding his shoulder. He spoke in low, agonized voice. “We should get this to the lord as soon as possible.”

Takumi didn’t detach his stare from the Takahashi brothers for a long while, before finally answering. “Fine.”

As he was turning his horse around he halted for one last time . “The villagers. What happened to them?”

Ryosuke answered. “They are under me now, so they will be relocated somewhere. You don’t have to worry; I will take care of them.”

“Like I could believe that after what you have done here.”

The words and the feisty tone Takumi used seemed to upset Ryosuke. “I will, even if you don’t believe so.”

*

Takumi rushed through the doors of their manor alone. After the meeting in the ruins he had sent Iketani to warn other villages nearby. He had ridden almost nonstop, and was exhausted, but still ran all the way from the entrance to the study room on the second floor. His father was drinking a cup of tea besides the fireplace as he arrived. Without saying a word he handed the paper to him.

As he laid the paper down after reading it, Takumi added the other news. “They have destroyed the border village and made camp near it. We are demanded to show up there in a week to surrender.”

Bunta rubbed his temples. “I thought he might try to pull something like this up, but not this soon. He has a surprisingly tight grip over the other lords.”

His words didn’t really make any sense to Takumi. He had thought before there must be something that happened between the King and his father but hadn’t questioned until now. But the situation had changed, and he needed to know everything related to it, so he spoke up. “Why did you think this would happen?”

Takumi watched as his father filled his pipe and lit it. It took a while for him to get the smoke flowing well and even as it did, he still just stared into the void. The silence was uncharacteristically long, even for him. It seemed like whatever he was about to say was something way more serious than Takumi had ever heard him tell.

“The day your mother died…“

Takumi’s eyes widened. There it was. The one thing he never talked about. Even as a child when Takumi had begged to hear of her, his father had just avoided the topic. Takumi could feel his hands starting to shake slightly and sat down. Was he really ready to hear this?

After a deep breath Bunta continued, speaking in a pained voice unfamiliar to Takumi. “She was from the Takahashi province, you know. Even after moving here when we got married she still frequently visited her dearest friend back there, who also happened to be lord Takahashi’s wife. That day you were with her too. I had stayed here to arrange some things but was coming to join you for a couple days of rest.”

He went silent all of a suddenly, clearly hesitating to continue, but still did so after a moment. “As I got to their manor something felt off right away. All of the servants were gone, so I just made my way to the parlour I knew they usually used. As I got there… It was already too late. There was blood everywhere and the room was a mess, they clearly hadn’t left without a fight... That was just like your mother, she never gave up on anything.”

He paused again, now mending the logs in the fireplace. Takumi could feel tears gathering in his eyes. No wonder his father didn’t want to talk about this, as only hearing the words made Takumi grieve so much. Actually remembering it must have been much more severe. But it seemed as that was not yet all of the story, as Bunta finished his mending and continued.

“You were sitting on the floor looking like you had been crying. The younger Takahashi boy was also there, trying to wake her mother, bloody all over. He tried to fight me as I took the both of you with me and went to the lord’s study. He sat there, not even flinching as he saw his own son covered in blood, crying and screaming. Nor did he when I told him what had happened. It was like he had no emotions whatsoever.”

A single tear fell down from Takumi’s eye, dropping down to his jaw. He leaned forward and covered his eyes with his hands, trying to fathom what he was hearing. His mother hadn’t just died… she had been murdered. And by the sound of it, lord Takahashi was the most suspicious person in the place, not being surprised or grieving at all. Suddenly Takumi realized that Keisuke had grown up with someone like that, and some of his rage towards him subdued. There was still much more to him than what he knew of, but that didn’t justify burning the village. Trying to clear his mind of all the questions Takumi raised his eyes to his father, asking the one thing related to all. “Do you think the lord was behind it?”

Once more Bunta just stared at the flames before answering. “It is entirely possible. There had been rumours of her wife wanting to run off with an another man. That would have been a big blow to his reputation.”

“He cared more of his reputation than his own wife?”

“He has always been too ambitious for his own good, but skilled nonetheless. That is a dangerous combination.”

“But… didn’t his wife’s death bring up more questions?”

“He covered it up, saying it had happened outside by a runaway soldier. Your mother dying as well actually made it more believable.”

Takumi couldn’t help the accusing tone of his voice. “And you didn’t do anything.”

Bunta looked at his son with pain in his eyes. A sight Takumi was not used to seeing. “I was heartbroken, and only wanted to keep you safe. Now that has come back to haunt me. I know too much, and he wants me out of the game.”

“And will you just let that happen?”

A bit of the usual spark returned to him. “ Never. Go get the commanders, we have a war to fight.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's time for my music recommendations once more! Lately I've been listening to early 2000's Nightwish, and specifically a song called Beauty of the Beast while writing. They have some really nice melodic rock/metal so check those out if you're interested.


	9. Chapter 9

Keisuke sat by a campfire, absentmindedly poking the embers with a long stick. Ever since the meeting in the village he had just been waiting for something to happen. There was not much to do around the camp, as designated soldiers took care of hunting and cleaning. Whenever he tried to offer his help they just politely declined. Partially because he was now a prince of the nation, but also because the majority of them had been serving his family for a long time. They knew him as someone who was sent after the people they couldn’t touch, walking in the shadows and doing anything to reach his goal. They were afraid of him.

Ryosuke on the other hand was busy taking care of relocating the villagers and maintaining peace among the restless soldiers. He had no time for chatting. So, for the most part Keisuke had been left alone with his thoughts. The exact thing he had been avoiding ever since the solstice ball. Finding out that the hunter had been his target all along felt overwhelming. It was something he couldn’t have prepared for even in his wildest dreams; hence his reaction had been to totally close off all thoughts involving him. As he had shared his knowledge of the area and the Fujiwaras with his father, he had left out everything considering Takumi. Not even Ryosuke knew of him being the one who had saved him from the river. It felt somehow… shameful. Owing his life to their enemy. That was not a feeling he was used to and had no idea how to deal with. 

The pine logs crackled in the fire, spreading around a smell of tar. Keisuke stared at the sparks dancing in the fire, flying away brightly as the sun, only to burn down suddenly, vanishing into thin air. The sparks reminded him of Takumi’s eyes as they had met the last time. Though he had a hard time imagining his anger would die down as fast as the sparks, as it had been much more intensive than he could have predicted. But perhaps there was a positive side to that too. If Takumi was to hate him with all of his being, there was no reason not to fight him when they would cross paths the next time, which seemed to be very close. As if he was an entirely different person, the past and it’s depts buried. Keisuke raised his eyes to the sky, sighing. He thought so now, but truly had no idea if he could actually kill him if the time came. Even he still had some sense of dignity left.

A crow circled over the camp, catching his attention. It was probably looking for an easy meal from the butcher. Still, the cawing made Keisuke feel restless. On the day of the solstice ball he had seen a crow flying over the castle, and the day had ended up being one of the hardest of his life. Could this even be the same bird? If it was or not didn’t matter, as seeing it reminded him of the fact that there was bound to be even more misery in his future.

Stabbing the stick angrily to the fire Keisuke stood up. Moping around wouldn’t do him any good. The crow was merely a bird, trying to survive as did all other animals. He would not let useless superstitions affect him, right? Trying to calm himself down he started to circle around the camp. There were soldiers training, some sharpening their swords or putting new feathers to arrows. The butcher was cleaning a pile of rabbits, some other men already starting a fire to cook them. Some were snoozing off in their spare time, while others stood in watch in the sides of the camp. Finally, Keisuke ended up in the middle of the camp, next to the King’s tent. It had been the first one they put up, but the King himself had arrived just a few hours ago. The additional soldiers he had brought with him were setting up tents for themselves on the left side. Judging by the number of them it seemed like he was preparing for things to go awry with the Fujiwaras. Thinking of that Keisuke turned and looked to the south, to the treeline where the vast forests started. Everything seemed unchanging. The tall trees had grown there for decades, even centuries. Even as the humans around them changed, they stayed there, witnessing their lives. 

Without any warning a flock small, chirping birds flew from the trees. Something moving inside the forest had scared them. Excitement sparked in Keisuke’s mind. Were they finally here? His heart started to beat faster, and he ran over to the side of the camp for a better view. First there was nothing, but then, out of nowhere something shining sparked from between the trees. A man in silver armour emerged from the forest, riding to the field. He was followed by an another man in similar attire, riding a gray horse. They halted about a hundred meters from the treeline, more men following them from the forest, forming straight lines behind them. Two soldiers took their position next to the leaders, holding the violet and silver flags. The wisteria emblem waved in the wind. The Fujiwaras had arrived and brought an army with them.

A lone man on horseback separated from the lines. A messenger. Keisuke stared at him, not sure of what to do. Before he managed to do anything, his father suddenly stood beside him. He smiled devilishly, looking at the lines of men facing them. “I knew he would not go down quietly.” Turning his eyes to Keisuke he added “It seems you still have more work to do.”

He didn’t wait for an answer, instead walking to greet the messenger himself. The shining white cape flowed behind him in the wind, the sun hitting his crown, making it sparkle. He stood tall and confident. It truly looked like he was born to rule men. As Keisuke watched them negotiate he couldn’t help but to feel chills on his back. He knew that once more he would be asked to take lives, as if they were nothing but small rocks on his father’s way.

*

They had agreed on meeting the Fujiwaras face-to-face in the middle of the field separating the two armies. As Keisuke approached the other side with his father, brother, and a few guards he focused on lord Fujiwara. He had only had a glimpse of him before, in the coronation. The man stood with relaxed posture, calmly watching as they approached. He was shorter than the King, but somehow Keisuke felt like he was not one anyone would want to cross on the battlefield. His relaxed, almost noncaring demeanour was much more alarming than a strict, orderly behaviour would have been. It felt like he knew he could fight his way out of any situation. He had even opted for not having any knights alongside him, only Takumi stood to his right. Keisuke tried to avoid looking at him the best he could, only sneaking a tiny glance. He looked calm on the outside, but Keisuke could have bet on that he was boiling inside. It was no wonder as he now faced both the main source of their trouble and the one who had personally betrayed him.

Their entourage halted in front of the Fujiwaras. The King eyed the lord from head to toe. Without as much as a greeting he spoke. “Sign the order.”

He was answered with as much politeness as he gave. “How did you manage to convince the other lords to agree with this plan of yours?”

The King smiled crookedly. “You don’t hold much power in the capital. Some needed a bit _convincing_ , but I have my ways.”

“And you expect me to accept based on that? Your order doesn’t even specify the reason for taking the land.”

“Oh, not yielding to your king? Quite the rebel you have become in your old age.”

“I would never surrender to the man who killed my wife.”

Keisuke’s eyes widened as he heard those words. He knew the lord’s wife had died years ago, but did his father really have something to do with it? Eager to find out the truth he glanced at the King, but his face showed no emotion whatsoever. However, something else caught his attention. Ryosuke seemed baffled, as if he was trying to remember something but couldn’t quite grasp it. It was rare to see such expression on his face as he usually kept calm at all times. Keisuke furrowed. Did he know something more about this?

The King’s answer interrupted his thoughts. “Surprising to hear such accusations from someone who has stayed silent all these years.” He turned to look at Takumi. “You are 18 I hear, so it has been, what 15 years? What a pity you never got to know her.”

Keisuke observed Takumi’s reaction with interest. He clenched his fists, saying nothing and instead just looking straight into the King’s eyes. His calmness was starting to crack, showing the lingering anger in his eyes. He looked like he was ready to start a fight right there. The King just looked at him, not seeming to be bothered by his anger. After a moment he turned his eyes back to the lord. “You will have your way then. We battle at dawn.”

Without waiting for response he turned on his heels and headed back to camp. It seemed that he had reached the exact outcome he had been planning all along. The guards followed him, but Ryosuke stayed in place. Keisuke patted his shoulder, trying to get him out of his trance. “Come on, let’s go.”

His brother ignored the gesture, instead raising his eyes to the lord who had stayed in place. “Was your wife the only casualty of that day?”

“No.”

He didn’t explain anything more, and Ryosuke didn’t ask. Keisuke was left confused. What on earth was this about? As the lord turned to leave, his eyes caught Keisuke’s. He halted, before speaking to him. “I had hoped you could have lived your live without blood in your hands.”

His expression was sad, and Keisuke couldn’t grasp the meaning behind his words. Did he mean what he was doing for his father? How much of that did he know of? Even if Takumi had talked about him, he had been careful not to tell him too much. They should still be unaware of him being the one behind all of that _convincing_ of the other lords and such. The lord’s words had caught him off guard, and as the men already walked away he didn’t even have a change to say anything back. He slowly turned to look at Ryosuke, who had completely fallen into his thoughts. There was no way he could get answers out of him when he was like that. Frustrated, Keisuke couldn’t stay in place and veered back to the camp. It seemed like ever since the whole deal with the Fujiwaras had started his life was suddenly filled with unanswered questions and unpleasant surprises.

*

Darkness had already wrapped the land to its soft embrace as Keisuke was called to the King’s tent. He walked through the camp, surprised of how fast the time had went by. He had been in a daze ever since the meeting, thinking about the lord’s words. And he was afraid of what his father was about to make him do this time. As he got there he saw his father sitting beside a table, moving small figurines over the map. Ryosuke was there too, looking at the map, but not seeming like he was fully present. The bad feeling got worse by the second. His father glanced at him. “Do you see this? They have the advantage on battle, coming from uphill. The number of soldiers is around the same on both sides, so that can make a difference. Go and change it around.”

Keisuke’s throat was dry as a desert, and he had to force the single word out. “How?”

“ _An accident_ involving the son would do wonders I imagine.”

He froze as he heard the command. Not daring to question his father he only bowed stiffly. The King waved for him to leave and Keisuke stepped outside. He had received these kinds of orders times and times again, so it was nothing new. Expect that this time he knew his target personally. As he walked to his own tent he couldn’t see or hear anyone around him. The words of lord Fujiwara played around in his head, mixing into the voice of his father. _Don’t stain your hands in blood. Do what’s best for the family. But it’s Takumi’s blood in your hands if you do this, he saved you. You can’t. But… there is no choice, they are danger to the family. The family always comes first. An accident is the easiest way for all._

Keisuke shook his head, pressing a hand to his forehead to ward off the emerging headache. He stepped into his tent and stood in the darkness for a good while. Finally, he made up his mind and hardened his heart. This was something he had to do, no matter what. He could not defy his father; he knew what was best for them. Determined to fulfil his duty he started to change into his black robes. After all, a metal armour wasn’t exactly the most convenient choice for an assassin. Slipping his dagger to his belt he let go of all of his emotions, becoming just the tool his father had honed over the years. There was only one goal on his mind.

*

He headed to the village that lied abandoned near their camp, aiming to infiltrate the other camp from the back. The blackness of burned wood, and the patches where snow had melted and exposed the ground worked to his favour. In the moonless night it was nearly impossible to notice one of the black spots moving a bit every now and then. He was patient, closing in the treeline slowly and steadily, while keeping his eyes open for guards.

The forest floor was covered with small plants, moss, and some bigger blackberry bushes. Keisuke carefully chose his steps on the icy ground. A soft glow of the camp’s fires made the shadows flicker, helping him blend into the darkness. Voices of the soldiers flowed to him, and occasionally the guard walked terrifyingly close to him. But this was what he had been trained for, and he kept his calm. He had come this far, so it was only about locating his target now. He slowly started to circle the camp, examining the area. As he approached the side where some of the horses were gathered, he spotted the same gray one he had seen Takumi ride. The mare was on the side of the herd, closest to the forest. He slowly got even closer, until he hid behind the large oak and the bushes growing around it, merely meters away from the horses. 

Wind changed direction suddenly, carrying Keisuke’s scent to the horses. The mare got nervous, taking restless steps, and puffing air out her nostrils. Keisuke cursed his bad luck, staying as still as possible, hoping that the animal would calm down soon. That didn’t happen, as the mare even let out a high-pitched neigh. Keisuke was unsure of what to do when his luck suddenly turned. There was a man walking towards the horses. And not just any plain stable boy. It was Takumi, carrying an armful of hay. He spread it out for the other horses before walking over to his own one. Speaking softly with words Keisuke couldn’t make out he managed to calm her down, starting to brush her as she ate. 

Keisuke stayed still, patiently waiting for Takumi to circle over. As he finally finished brushing one side of the horse, he walked over, turning his back to the woods. Almost immediately the assassin made his move. He slowly closed the distance between them, careful not to cause any noises. As he was just behind him he quickly reached out his hand, covering his mouth. At the same time he circled his other arm around his waist, pulling him to the darkness. Takumi tried to struggle in his hold but couldn’t use most of his strength in that position. As they got out of sight he pushed him to the ground, placing a knee to his chest. Raising a dagger to his throat he hissed “A word and you’ll be dead”.

Behind them the mare moved around restlessly, but as the silence continued she calmed down. No one seemed to have noticed anything, so Keisuke turned his full attention to Takumi. Now that he had reached his goal he suddenly found himself unable to do anything. Usually he would have already done the deed and ran away, but something was keeping his hand in place. _Just do it. The sooner the better, and then you can just forget._ The man under him stayed quiet, gazing at him without averting his eyes. His anger was clear as a day, all of it directed at him. It was almost enough to make Keisuke let him go. What a mess he had become. He just couldn’t treat this as a job like any other, he had been lying to himself when he thought he could. Shaking his head he just decided to say what first came to his mind. “What were those accusations about?”

The man under him frowned. “ _That’s_ what you came to ask?”

Keisuke gritted his teeth, grabbing Takumi’s collar with his free hand. “Answer me.”

Takumi hesitated, as if wondering how Keisuke would react to his words. It seemed he still had some faith in him not killing him as he answered with a question yet again. “Shouldn’t you be asking that from your father?”

Keisuke snorted quietly. “Like I could just get an answer from him. Tell me.”

Takumi avoided his eyes, glancing to the side. He stayed silent for so long that Keisuke already wondered if he should ask again. Just then he turned his eyes back to his, and it seemed like some of his anger had lifted, though he still was nowhere near friendly. It was almost more like sorrow mixed in his feelings. 

“You… You told me your mother died when you were young, as did mine. It was the same day. The same person behind it.”

For a second Keisuke struggled to realize what he meant, but then it hit him. That’s what Ryosuke had wanted to know. It was as if the words had opened a hole in the wall he had built to keep out his darkest memories. Memories of the day his mother had passed. As one of the memories resurfaced nothing could stop the other ones from flooding out too. _The blood that was everywhere, his terror as he couldn’t make her mother wake up. The warmth that still lingered on her. On the background, the crying of the other boy. The boy… He had been there often with his mother. She was always kind, sneaking sweets to him when his own mother wasn’t watching. But she too was covered in blood, her long chestnut hair spreading all over the floor._

Immersed in his memories he clenched his hand, accidentally drawing blood with his dagger. Takumi winced, bringing Keisuke back to the present. He looked at the man, wide-eyed. “You were there.”

Takumi froze in place, his expression shocked. Suddenly his eyes went hazy. It was as if he saw a vision, or found a lost memory in the midst of his mind “The pond… The golden haired child.”

That didn’t mean anything to Keisuke. He shook him from his collar. “What is that supposed to mean?”

His eyes sharpened again as he returned from his memories. “Don’t let anyone else decide your enemies for you.”

The words shook Keisuke. And somehow he only now realised that was what he had been doing all his life. Getting rid of the enemies his father had named. Even Takumi. He had tossed aside the feelings they had shared for the sake of his father. But… there had to be good reasons behind all of those choices. There had to be. For Takumi too. Keisuke tightened his hold again, baffled of the situation, still somehow determined to not let his father down. But as the deep blue eyes stared right back at him, he couldn’t move the blade. Takumi wasn’t afraid even when he was outpowered and helpless. It was the same man who had saved him and unconditionally cared for him. They had laughed together. He had taught him about the woods. Shared food with him. Given him a bit of the warmth he hadn’t known he graved. Even more surprisingly he was someone he had played with in the past, in the bright times before the death of his mother. And now he was someone who claimed it had been Keisuke’s own father who had ended those happy times. The image of his dead mother resurfaced on his mind, now distorted so that his father stood beside her, smiling devilishly with a bloody dagger on his hand.

Nothing seemed to make any sense anymore. Keisuke’s hands started to tremble, and his blade fell from his hand. He slowly rose, staring at the man whose expressions couldn’t be read at all. He had though his resolve couldn’t waver, but he had been wrong. “A life for a life. My dept has been paid.” He whispered before disappearing back into the shadows, not looking back.

*

Keisuke stumbled into Ryosuke’s tent, still wearing all of his gear. His brother had been reading next to the fireplace but shoot up as he saw him. He walked to him, asking “Did you do it?”

Keisuke looked at his trembling hands and then back up, not believing what he was saying. “I… I couldn’t. I had my blade on his throat, but I couldn’t.”

His brother’s expression was a mix of shock, and… satisfaction? Keisuke didn’t understand that. He let him lead him to sit down near the fire, drinking the wine he gave. Ryosuke sat opposite to him, giving him the choice to start talking when he wanted. It took a moment before he managed to find the right words.

“He... The heir. Takumi. I know him. He is the hunter I told you about. The one who saved me from drowning. The one I thought I could call a friend. He turned out to be the target himself.”

Keisuke lost his voice again, staring at his hands, remembering all the times someone’s blood had covered them. How that had become so normal to him? Was it really all just because of his father’s ambitions? Were the ones he had killed been innocent?

Ryosuke had been looking at him quietly but spoke as it seemed his brother didn’t have anything left. “That was the right choice.”

Keisuke raised his gaze to him, eyes full of pain. “Was it? He stands in our way at dawn.”

“He will, but in the battlefield you are equal. Only your fighting skills will decide the outcome there.”

For a moment they were both silent, looking at the dancing flames of the fireplace. Ryosuke broke the silence.

“Did he add anything to what his father said in the field?”

Keisuke hadn’t even realized he had left out such an important detail. “Yes, he did. He said both of our mothers died at the same time. I… I actually started to remember things from that day. You know how I’ve only ever remembered the warmth of her blood in my hands? But now… The memories were so intricate. There indeed was an another woman, and her son. That was him.”

Ryosuke rubbed his chin, deep in thought. “I was returning from the capital with my tutor that day, and as we arrived in the evening someone told me that mom and one of her friends had been killed by a runaway soldier. The grief of losing her was overpowering, but as time passed I every now and then thought about who the other one had been. Father never spoke of that, and as I was always studying I wasn’t around her friends, unlike you. But the lord’s words brought that back to my mind.”

“So, do you believe father was really behind that?”

“He never has seemed truly upset of her death, nor visited her grave. It seems possible, but I need more evidence to be sure. After all, we shouldn’t take the words of enemies without some critique.”

“You are right.”

Ryosuke smiled at him, but there was pain in his eyes “For the longest time I’ve feared your upbringing made you lost some of your humanity. He treats you like a tool, not like a son. When I was younger I used to plead him to go easier on you, but he wouldn’t listen to me. Eventually I stopped. I regret that.”

Keisuke’s eyes widened as he looked at his brother, who he had though he knew well. He had never before shared these thoughts with him. “Really?”

“Yes.” He took his hands and squeezed them, staring right at him. “Hold on to that feeling of doubt and make your decisions yourself. He is not almighty.”

Keisuke was taken back to the words Takumi had said to him. It was basically the same advice yet again. It felt too specific to be a coincidence, so maybe there really was some truth in those words. Looking back at his brother he answered. “I’ll remember that.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So far this fic has just been drama/action or something, but... one day... it'll be something more... I mean there is the pairing tag 😂 It's funny how this already has 25k words compared to the 37k that Involuntary Blood Donation (my 1st fic) has. This one will be a real monster when I'll get to the end someday.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lately I've been listening to Hildegard von Blingin' medieval style covers from youtube while writing. (Mostly Summertime Sadness and Jolene.) While this fic only has loosely medieval (aka I just use it as a loose description for olden times with knights and such) setting I feel like those songs help me with getting into writing mode. Check them out if you feel like it :D
> 
> Also, this somehow ended up being the longest chapter so far, being almost 3 times the lenght of the shortest one lol what is consistency

Keisuke slept restlessly, waking up countless times in cold sweat, the words from last night chaotically echoing through his mind. Was he just going to accept that the father he had been brought up to respect was behind the murder of his own wife? He was not a warm person to say the least, but the accusation still came out of nowhere, and he didn’t dare to believe it. However, that would mean Takumi had outright lied to him, and he hadn’t taken him for such a person. He had no idea who was actually right, but were the accusations to be true, the whole foundation of his life would go crumbling down and he couldn’t handle that just now. That in mind he decided to believe in his own father, rather than someone he had only known for a brief moment. Nevertheless, it did seem like the King had some kind of grudge against lord Fujiwara as he went out of his way to bring him down so openly. Usually his opponents met a much quieter end, as Keisuke well knew.

Frustrated with all the things he did not have an answer for Keisuke decided it was futile to keep on rolling around his bed. Instead he got up and started to clean his armour, despite it already being in great condition. When one of the guards finally came to wake him up hours later, he was already fully dressed, stretching his fingers to keeps his restlessness at bay.

The faint light of rising sun was starting to colour the sky in shades of red as Keisuke walked through the camp. All around him soldiers were getting ready, tightening the buckles of their armour and checking their weapons. The atmosphere was buzzing with nervous excitement. Some younger soldiers were shaking in their boots, waiting for their first battle, while seasoned old-timers joked on their behalf. Keisuke was nervous too, not so much for the oncoming battle, but for how his father would react to hearing that he hadn’t succeeded in his mission. He hadn’t even stayed up to hear the report, being so used to his commands being fulfilled. As Keisuke reached his tent he halted for a moment, taking a deep breath before opening the curtains.

His father stood there as his manservants dressed him in his new white armour. One fitting the King he was now. Keisuke stepped in and stayed silent, paying attention to details to help keep his thoughts in control. The contrast to his father’s old colours of black and gold that his sons still wore, was striking. He now shone brighter than ever, gathering the attention of all. The King was the only one allowed to use white for that exact reason, to showcase him as the shining light of hope among his subjects. The armour had been polished perfectly, the bronze sun emblem of the realm in it almost radiating. The intricately shaped metal of the crown glimmered, the colour complementing his black hair that was starting to turn silver on his temples. Instead of the usual gold king’s used, copper had been the most valuable metal when the nation formed, hence being reserved for the king.

The servants tightened the last buckles and were send away. Keisuke waited for his father to speak first, watching as he poured himself some wine before sitting down. He took a sip, and asked “Well? Report.”

Keisuke unconsciously straightened his posture even more before answering. “Their camp was too strictly guarded. I couldn’t get close enough.”

The silence lingered on, before his father finally answered. “ _You_ failed?”

His face showed no emotion, making it even more disturbing. Keisuke had no idea what he was thinking. Unable to endure his piercing eyes he turned his head down, not even daring to think what he would say if he heard what really had happened. “Yes.”

Shouts of commanders ordering their soldiers around were muffled by the thick layers of fabric, making the tent eerily quiet. A small clank suddenly broke it. The wine goblet being put to the table. Then, a louder clank, from the armour as the King rose, the noise continuing as he walked to Keisuke. Only as he stood next to him and laid his hand to his shoulder did their eyes meet. His father’s stare was cold, disapproval showing through. He whispered to his ear. “You’ll be in the frontline. Show me your worth.”

Keisuke froze in place as he heard him. Even as the King walked out, he couldn’t move, the words repeating in his mind. The frontline was place for young knights aiming to gain glory, despite the extreme danger it brought. Going head-on with the enemies who were still in their best condition, nothing hindering their sight. He had never been on that position before. But on the other hand, he had failed in the one thing he was supposed to be the best at, in a way deserving it. And for what he had failed? A man he barely knew, who managed to use words against him. Sure, the connection from the past had surprised him, but that changed nothing. They had been just small kids. Even if their mothers wouldn’t have wanted for this to happen, they couldn’t stop it anymore. Keisuke had decided to stand on his father’s side, and the Fujiwaras had chosen to go against him. There was no other possible outcome from that than war, and he was about to fight in it. On a battle where the man with more skills would walk away victorious. He was not going to be the one who didn’t. All of his depts had been paid last night, he was now free. With his newfound determination Keisuke held his head high, rushing outside to welcome anything the future held.

*

The sun rose above horizon, slowly turning the sky to its usual blue from the vivid red it had been. The wind was picking up, making the few scattered clouds glide across the sky. They were not enough to make it rain, and it seemed like the day would be a beautiful one. Some crows circled over the forest, as if they knew what was about to happen, and were waiting for the feast on the end of it.

Keisuke walked to the stables, where the boys had already prepared his mare. He patted her, muttering “we are in for a real challenge today, right?”

She didn’t seem to care about him, instead looking at the bag of apples on the side. Keisuke laughed a bit and took one from the bag. “Fine, you’ll definitely earn it.”

She seemed content, and Keisuke jumped to the saddle, making his way towards their troops that had already gathered on the side of the field. He noticed Ryosuke on the centre with his horse, talking to someone who he didn’t recognize. His clothes were worn down, looking out of place with all the armoured soldiers surrounding him. Something was off though, as his horse looked like he could have come from the king’s stables. There was no way a commoner could have afforded an animal like that, bred for speed rather than strength.

He got closer just as their conversation seemed to end. The stranger turned, and their eyes met. A gust of wind waved his black hair, and he tried to push it away from his face, yet some strands still fell to his forehead. His eyes were like onyxes, shining from under the bushy eyebrows. Seeing him up close Keisuke realised he had definitely seen him before, but couldn’t pinpoint where that had been. The man nodded at him, before pulling on his dark blue hood and heading towards north, in the direction of the capital.

Keisuke rode next to Ryosuke, quite confused about the situation. “Who was that?”

“Someone trying to find the truth in this situation.”

“And why does he care about that?”

“We shall meet him again. Don’t worry about it now.”

Keisuke didn’t pressure him more, deciding to believe in his motives. For a moment they silently observed the soldiers dressed in black and grey gathering around them, forming straight lines. There were some knights on horseback, but the majority of soldiers were on foot, wielding lances or swords. Archers formed their own units, ready to start their attack as soon as the battle horn would mark the start of the fight. After seeing their opponents on the other side of the field most seemed to believe they would easily crush the Fujiwaras, not taking their better position into account. Their soldiers mostly looked like they had been pulled there from their fields with their homespun leather armours. Not to also undermine the mental benefit of having the King on your side.

However, Keisuke didn’t quite agree with them on that. From the little he had seen of lord Fujiwara he didn’t doubt for a second he wouldn’t have trained his troops well. They might be farmers pulled from reserve to serve on this war, but their lines were as straight as on the King’s side and they didn’t seem to fidget around too much. As his eyes landed in the middle of the other group, to the lord and his son, Keisuke couldn’t help but to keep on staring. The lord looked straight ahead, while Takumi talked to a knight next to him. Keisuke could feel his heartbeat fastening. He hadn’t noticed Ryosuke was looking at him before he asked “So, what are you going to do now?”

Keisuke didn’t meet his eyes. “He decided to oppose us. Whatever happened in the past doesn’t change that. If the opportunity raises I will not hesitate to cut him down.”

“Did father order you to do that?”

Keisuke looked down to his hands, clenching them around the reins. Finally raising his eyes to meet his brother’s he answered. “He wants me to prove my worth.”

Ryosuke frowned, and he hesitated to continue. However, his brother’s demanding gaze gave little room for that. “The frontline.”

His eyes widened. “He’s insane. No one would put their own son there, it’s too chaotic.”

“Well he did. I have no choice.”

“So… you are going to battle Takumi again. If you even reach him.”

“Yeah. And I will.”

They were silent for a moment, before Ryosuke quietly asked “Are you sure that is a good idea?”

“There is no need to prolong this battle. The battle ends when either side backs off or yields and targeting the leaders will be the fastest way to achieve that.”

His brother nodded. “Well, it’s fair game this time.”

“It is.”

They watched as the last few soldiers found their places on the other side, raising up new Fujiwara banners. Ryosuke stared at them, suddenly asking “Do you know why they chose violet and silver as their colours?”

The unexpected change in topic surprised Keisuke, but he still answered. “Violet from wisteria trees, their emblem. For silver… a reference to their sources of iron, and hence steel?”

“You are right. Flowers and blades. Power wrapped in beauty.”

He didn’t know how to deal with the sudden poetic thoughts of his brother, so he just waited for him to continue.

“Do you know why our ancestors chose gold as their colour?”

“To showcase wealth I suppose.”

“Not quite. It was for their blonde hair. Back then most members of the Takahashi family had that. Now it’s just you.”

Keisuke furrowed his brows. “What are you trying to say?”

“Have you ever looked through our family tree?”

Keisuke was even more confused than before. Why on earth was he bringing that up now?

The sound of drums announced the King’s arrival, not letting Keisuke ask what his brother meant. The King rode slowly, looking almost relaxed. Five guards followed him a few steps back. He halted next to his sons, eyeing the opposing troops before he spoke. “Ryosuke. What do you think of this setting? Who will prevail victorious today?”

“They have the nature on their side. The tailwind helps their archers, and it is easier to defend from uphill. However, we have more knights and our soldiers are more experienced. It is anyone’s game.”

The King nodded. “A good analysis. All right, you stay with me here, observing how this plays out. It is a good experience for your future.” He turned his gaze to Keisuke. “Carry out your mission.”

Keisuke nodded slightly. As he was turning his horse around to go join the other knights his brother reached out to pat his back. Wind tousled his short black hair and his expression was worried, making him look younger than usual. “Take care of yourself.”

Keisuke stared at the face so similar, yet so different from his own. He was the one who had always been there for him, the one he could always count on. So, he forced a carefree smile on his face. “Of course. See you later.”

He waved his hand and rode on, leaving his brother behind. Talking with him had only raised more questions, but this was not the time to think about those. They could wait until the battle was over.

*

The excitement and fear could almost be touched as he waited the order to attack alongside the other men. The horses were nervous as well, taking steps and puffing into the air. He patted his own mare’s neck. She stayed calm, showing that the long years of training hadn’t gone to waste. Keisuke took his helmet and put it on. His vision instantly narrowed. Even with the armour he still had several weak spots on places where the layer of iron would have hindered his movement too much. The armour didn’t make him invincible, but at least he was more protected than he would have been without it. Stretching his upper body he started to feel the numbing sensation he always got when his brain got into battle mode. Nothing else than surviving mattered in that moment, so other thoughts were not necessary.

The flags fluttered against their poles in the wind that was picking up. Suddenly the voice of the horn pierced the air, followed by the yell of the King. “Bring me the traitor!”

Both sides slowly moved on, picking up speed as they advanced. Keisuke unsheathed his sword, holding it up and yelling with the men as they rode against the lines of their enemies. Arrows rained down from the sky, and Keisuke had to use his sword to deflect them. Next to him a man was not so lucky as he suddenly dropped from his horse after an arrow hit his chest. The wind gave them more power than usual, easily piercing through the layer of metal. There was no time to help him, nor to give him any more thought. As Keisuke reached the line of their enemies the arrows changed into swords and lances. He lashed his sword right and left, dropping men from their horses, and wounding them. All the time he feverishly tried to locate either one of the Fujiwaras from the chaotic swarm of men and horses.

Silver glimmering in the sunlight caught his attention soon after. The armour was still as clean as it had been before the battle started. Unlike the King, the lord fought alongside his men. He rode a large black horse and seemed to have no trouble at all with the Takahashi knights surrounding him. It seemed like the horse was a part of him as they spun from side to side, injuring the knights one by one. Keisuke turned his own mount to him, slowly starting his approach thorough the chaos. Most of the enemies in his way were on foot, unable to do much harm for him and instead focused on other men on foot, leaving the knights to fight each other.

He was only a few horse lengths away from the lord as a fast strike of sword suddenly came from his right, almost outside his field of vision. He barely managed to evade it and turned to look at the man who had dealt the blow. The familiar gray mare greeted him, with a man in silver armour on her back. Takumi. A few stains of blood tarnished his shining breastplate, and the crest engraved to it. His face was hidden behind the helmet, his mood unreadable. For a second they just stayed in place, looking at each other, before cheering their horses onwards. Their swords clanked together so loudly that even over the noise of the battle Keisuke heard it. They quickly backed off, only to clash again seconds later. Circling each other they tried to find weak spots. Keisuke aimed to Takumi’s knee, but he backed off just in time. He in turn aimed for Keisuke’s head, but he ducked down. Their play seemed to last forever, but suddenly fate took a role in the course of events.

As they once again approached each other Takumi’s horse suddenly tripped over something. The mare collapsed down, taking Takumi with her. He barely managed to release his right foot from the stirrup, avoiding crushing under the horse. He laid unmoving for a second, making Keisuke think he had fainted over the blow, but soon raised his head. Slowly he gathered his thoughts and stood up, pulling the helmet out of his head, and tossing it to the side. He swiped his damp hair away from his face and picked up his sword from the ground. A thin line of blood flowed from a scratch on his cheek, but the hit didn’t seem to have made any serious damage. The eyes that stared at him were the same ones filled with flames he had seen last night. As he took a stance, preparing to face an opponent from horseback, Keisuke didn’t even think through his actions. He jumped down from his horse, also tossing his helmet to the ground. Noticing the surprise in his eyes he had to address that. “I want to deal with this on a fair fight. Like there was never anything between us. We chose to stand on different sides ourselves.”

Takumi nodded ever so slightly, changing his stance to fit his opponent. “Come.”

And so he did. Aiming straight to his neck Keisuke rushed forward. Takumi dodged to the right, but he had expected that. Following him he managed to land a clear hit to his chest but didn’t have enough power behind the attack to pierce the metal. Only the wisteria emblem of the surface was left with damage. Clearly surprised his opponent took a step back. Without giving him time to think Keisuke attacked again. This time Takumi blocked with his sword, locking them in place, gazing right into each other’s eyes. Time slowed down, and the noises around the quieted down in their minds. All of the other fighters let them alone, not daring to disturb the duel of the heirs.

Breaking their eye contact Takumi suddenly detached himself and made a pirouette around. He targeted Keisuke’s back, but changed directions at the last moment, instead aiming to his side. Keisuke felt him hit the metal under his shoulder, but nothing pierced through to his skin. As he retreated back he realized what his aim had been. He had cut the leather strips that hold his shoulder plate in place. It moved uncomfortably, so Keisuke just cut the remaining strips on the front himself. The piece dropped down, leaving his left shoulder exposed, but at least easy to move. Keisuke was stunned. No one else had ever managed to use such a tactic on him. He really was trained well, and it must have been thanks to his father. “I knew a mere hunter wouldn’t have the skills you showed in the forest that day.”

Takumi furrowed his brows. “And I thought you were just a sword for hire, not a mindless hunting dog for your father.”

That shook Keisuke more than he wanted to admit. All of his doubts about his father and his own acts came crushing down to his mind. Laying aside all intricate techniques, he attacked straight on with full power. Takumi blocked his attack with his sword, even as the force of it shook his hands. It didn’t end there. He attacked again and again, but somehow none of his blows landed on their target.

The sun rose higher, and air was starting to warm up. The melting snow made it humid, and the muddy ground stick to their boots, slowing them down. Their fight had dragged along longer than Keisuke would have expected, and he started to feel exhausted. However, so seemed Takumi. Counting on that he gathered his strength and attacked once more. But this time Takumi swiftly blocked his sword, simultaneously taking a fast step back and launching a counterattack in a second, aiming for his exposed shoulder. It was quicker than he could have anticipated from him at this point, and simply didn’t have enough energy left to move fast enough to block it. Also, it was the exact same move that had surprised him in the forest, Keisuke realized the second the sword pierced his left shoulder, just under the collarbone. He cried in agony, his vision blurring. Takumi looked sad, whispering to him. “I really thought we could have been friends.” Before he stepped back, pulling his sword out.

Keisuke staggered as he felt blood rushing out of the wound. He fell down to his knees, utterly defeated. His heartbeat drummed loudly on his ears. The exhaustion of the long fight weighed on him, but even more so it was mental. He had never been driven into a situation this bad before. _This is it_ , he thought. _My tale ends here._ Accepting that fate he kept his head down, just waiting for the final blow.

Instead of a fast slash, he suddenly felt the cold blade touch under his chin, forcing his head up. Takumi glared at him, brows furrowed, as if he was deep in though. There was anger in his eyes, but that was not all. There was something he couldn’t read. Keisuke hold his breath without noticing, waiting for him to thrust his blade forward at any moment. Instead, Takumi loosened up a bit, slaying him with his words in place of his sword. “Go. Serve your king. Waste your life.”

Keisuke’s eyes widened as he heard the words, his mind trying to comprehend the situation that had ended in a way he could never have imagined. Takumi pulled his blade back and turned his back to him. A clear sign he didn’t see Keisuke as a threat anymore. He walked to his mare, who had managed to get up but was limping one of her legs. He carefully lead the horse away from the battle, while monitoring his surroundings in case of any incoming attacks. Keisuke couldn’t do anything but to helplessly stare at his back.

He felt like he could faint at any moment, and realised he needed to stop the bleeding right away. Next to him laid an abandoned flag of the Fujiwaras. He ripped a piece from it with his sword, wrapping his shoulder the best he could and fastening the fabric with his good hand and teeth. The violet fabric was soon tarnished into deep red, but it felt like the flow had eased. How ironic that such a piece of clothing was now helping him. He took a deep breath before stumbling back to his feet, leaning onto his sword. Looking around he didn’t see his horse anywhere, which was no surprise. He cursed the whole situation, as he turned back to their own side.

It was as if he was in trance, weaving his way through the battle. No one paid attention to him. The Fujiwara troops didn’t see him as a threat anymore, and were anyway too busy fighting, as were their own soldiers. He was just one of the wounded, trying to make it to behind of the lines for some medical attention. His blood had coloured the golden engravements of his armour red, and his vision started to waver. He had almost reached their own side as he collapsed to his knees. Staying still, trying to focus on keeping awake. Suddenly a small thud caught his attention, and he looked ahead. An arrow was stuck to the ground, still wavering from the hit. After the initial wave there were now much less arrows shot. Still, only one was enough to kill a man. “Shit.” He muttered and managed to force himself back up.

After a while he finally saw Ryosuke. He and their father sat on their horses, inspecting the field in front of them, as they had been the whole time. They seemed untouched, entirely indifferent to the mess that reigned on the battlefield. Still, seeing them meant he was almost back. As he slowly dragged himself on another arrow landed on the ground. He cursed again, trying to pick up his pace. For a moment it helped, but soon after he was brought to his knees again. He tried to calm his breathing, focusing on keeping the lingering darkness away from his mind. Just a bit more, just a bit… he kept on telling himself. Struggling, he lifted his head and looked to his brother once more. He could see the familiar focused look on his face as he observed the fight.

As if Keisuke’s stare had drawn his attention he turned his head and their eyes met. His expression changed into terrified in a flash. He turned to their father, yelling something. A particularly strong blast drowned the words into the wind, and he only saw his brother turn, cheering his horse onwards.

Relief flushed into Keisuke’s mind as he saw him approaching. Soon he would be resting in the medic’s tent. It was still just the beginning of the day, but it felt like it had been an eternity already. He felt like he could sleep for days.

But the battle wouldn’t let him get away so easily. Baring its fangs for the last time it showed the unfairness that the chaos of men fighting for their lives brought. There was nothing fair or rightful about fighting on a battle. The random elements connected, giving birth to a catastrophe. A moment of not paying attention to the fight. A stray arrow, carried by the surprisingly strong wind. It hit Ryosuke right over his collarbone, to the part covered only in chainmail.

Keisuke saw as his eyes widened, and in the same moment he collapsed forward to his horse’s neck. From there he slid down to the ground. Keisuke watched in horror. No. No, no, no, nonono. This could not be happening. He had seen an arrow easily pierce though a layer of solid metal just the same day. There was no way his brother could walk away from that. His sword dropped from his hand, and adrenaline rushed through his veins. He stumbled up and forced himself to run the short distance to where he was lying.

He got to him in a flash, only to see that there was nothing to be done. The arrow stuck out from the back of his neck. There was blood everywhere. _It must had cut an artery._ He thought mechanically. Ryosuke’s eyes still focused on Keisuke as he arrived to his field of vision. Clearly in pain he still managed to raise his hand to Keisuke’s cheek, whispering to him “your…life…is…your…ow..n” His nails crazed Keisuke’s cheek as the hand suddenly dropped, and his eyes closed. A chain of random events had ended his story.

Keisuke didn’t want to believe what was happening. He shook his brother’s shoulders, screaming “Ryosuke! RYOSUKE!” But it was all in vain.

Their father had reached them without him noticing. He sat on his horse, looking down to his sons. Without saying a word he signalled to his commander to come closer. “Retreat the forces.” He glanced at Keisuke and gave his other command to the guards near them. “Protect the crown prince.”

As the soldiers surrounded them, Keisuke realized he had not meant Ryosuke, but him. Looking down to his brother’s lifeless body the tears started to run down his cheeks. He crouched over and saw the clear drops mixing into the blood and the golden and black swirls of the armour. As that sight engraved itself to his mind he finally succumbed to the darkness that hovered over him.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Despite the misery in the last chapter I got so much comments on that one, thank you! It was lovely ꒰⌯͒•̩̩̩́ ᴗ •̩̩̩̀⌯͒꒱  
> I would have wanted to upload this chapter sooner, but the little thing called life got the better out of me, and instead of fiction I've been writing my master's thesis and doing some lab work. Sadly for my hobbies, it still isn't over, and hence the next chapter will most probably also take a long time. I appreaciate all of you who still follow the story! It will get better for the boys at some point, I promise :'D

The medic of the King’s army swiped sweat from his forehead, smearing blood all over without noticing. He cursed and gestured for the servant boys to come. Yet an another soldier had died on his table. The wooden surface had long lost its shine under the blood that had been bled that morning. There was no time to mourn one soldier. As the body was moved, an another one was laid down on its place.

The medic glanced at his new patient quickly, evaluating the situation. He couldn’t quite hide his surprise as he recognized who laid on the table. Even as the emblems of the armour had been covered in blood and mud the hair gave it away. Both common soldiers and noble knights had ended up in his care before, but a prince? His skin had lost all of its colour, making him look more like a marble statue than a living person. And by the medic’s diagnosis he was more than close of actually not being alive. The only thing even convincing him otherwise were his eyes that rapidly moved under the closed lids. He stepped closer and quickly examined his head, luckily no hits there, all of the blood was from other wounds.

The shoulder was what worried him. The strip of fabric that had been tied around it was covered in dark red all over, and there was no telling what it had been used for before this. _He must be on the borderline of dying from blood loss. The bandage managed to slow the flow just enough to keep him alive, there is no time to waste._ The medic thought and stepped back, preparing a needle for stitching and some salve to reduce the bleeding. At the same time he ordered the blacksmith that had helped him all morning. “Chest and left arm.”

His command was carried out immediately. While the metal armour helped on the battlefield, it was more often than not in the way of treatment. As the blacksmith carefully removed the metal pieces he had to change the position of the injured arm, which resulted in a small whine.

“Done.” The smith noted.

The medic nodded and started his work, first cutting the bandage and tossing it aside. Luckily the edges of the wound were clean. It was clearly from a single sword strike and had only pierced through fabric and not the armour itself. He quickly cleansed the wound and started to sew it close. The man stayed silent this time.

*

The constant, small and sharp pinches in his shoulder finally brought Keisuke somewhat back to his senses. His mind struggled to register what was happening and his body didn’t answer to his attempts of moving. After a moment that felt like eternity he managed to move the fingers of his right hand, feeling the sticky but even surface under them. _Where am I?_

He forced his eyes as open as he could, which was not much. Through his lashes he saw a dark figure working on his shoulder. _The feeling. He’s closing the wound._ He realized. Even as he felt the needle stickling through his flesh he didn’t react. It felt like he was disconnected from his body, all of the hassle around him seeming unnecessary.

From far away he heard someone yelling but couldn’t make out the words. However, as the person came closer and closer his words finally reached him. “The crown prince died!”

People gasped, and it became eerily silent. It felt like someone had pierced Keisuke’s mind with a lance, hurting him more than any physical injury he had ever suffered. He pressed his nails to his palm, unable to control his thoughts. _Is there anything this life could give me anymore?_

From somewhere deep inside his mind a voice answered.

_No._

And he believed that. Closing his eyes again he didn’t care if he were to never open them again.

*

Even when his soul was ready to give up, his body wasn’t. As the swaying of a moving carriage slowly awakened him once more he didn’t have any idea how long had passed. The tall white birches around the road clearly told him that they had left the battleground a good while ago. The glow of the cloudless sky made him squint, almost mocking his suffering. The feeling of disconnection had vanished, and his shoulder ached. He felt drowsy and the pain on his head intensified with every small movement. Even as he tried to fall back asleep he couldn’t. There was a bottle next to him, and he painfully managed to drink from it. The two soldiers sitting in the front of the carriage chatted, not noticing him being awake, and he didn’t bother to note them, wanting to be left alone. He stayed awake for a good while, watching the blue vastness of the sky, his mind as blank as it, trying hard to ward off any thoughts.

Suddenly, a large crow landed on the edge of the carriage, its eyes shining like black jewels. Keisuke stared straight into those emotionless eyes and remembered the times when he had seen crows flying around. He wasn’t a superstitious person but couldn’t help but to feel that this was indeed the harbinger of death that had now fulfilled its fate and come to mock him. As if the crow had heard him it cawed once and left. A black feather floated in the air, landing on his chest. It felt crushingly heavy, and once more led him to the darkness.

As he gained awareness the next time he was greeted by the familiar sight of his home. The black stone walls felt more oppressing than ever, as if the darkness wouldn’t leave him even for a moment. His vision was hazy, and he wavered between unconsciousness and being awake. Still, some things stayed clear in his memory. His father rushing inside. The long rectangular box covered in black velvet in one of the carriages. The beaten soldiers gathering into lines. Someone carrying him to a bed. The granny from the kitchen bringing him food and forcing him to eat and drink. A sudden fever that burned his body and mind. Everything was a mess, and he didn’t have the power to drag himself up. So, he just slept. But not even that could bring peace to his mind.

*

_He was running through a forest, chased by shadows. The figures played around the trees, closing in on him, and then backing off again. He tried to cut them with his sword, but the smoky bodies avoided the blade. Suddenly one more shadow appeared right ahead of him. Trying to escape he leaped to the right, but there was an another one there. Desperately looking around he realized that they had him surrounded, and he started to see faces in the flowing material. The servant he had killed, and whose brother had seen him in the capital. A nobleman who had betrayed his father some years back. A soldier who had run off after stealing something from the manor. Alongside them were many others. The lives he had taken, now staring straight at him with their cold, lifeless eyes. The servant’s brother started chanting the words he had whispered at the castle on that fateful day._

_“Aurum in morte.”_

_Slowly the others joined him, and the whole forest echoed with the words. He still didn’t understand the exact meaning of the words, but their message was clear. His hands started to shake, the blade dropping to the ground as he fell to his knees. What right did he have to run from them? He had ended their time on earth, not caring about all of the things they had wanted to achieve, or the people left grieving. And where that kind of life had led him? There was nothing good waiting for him, only the orders of his father to fulfil. That in mind he slowly closed his eyes and relaxed his hands to his sides._

_“Come.”_

_As soon as he whispered the word shivers ran over his body. Cold, barely tangible hands started to tug him into different directions. Blood began to run from his shoulder once again, the pain intensifying by the second, but he didn’t care._

_Suddenly the ravenous shadows disappeared. Even through his closed lids Keisuke realized it was getting darker. He slowly opened his eyes. A shadow blacker than a moonless night had arrived, making the others withdraw. They hid behind the trees, still waiting for a new chance. The blackness didn’t touch Keisuke, but somehow its presence still felt the most painful. As he watched a figure started to form from the darkness, stepping out of it. A golden light lit up on the sky, ascending to the shadows. The other ghosts hissed and disappeared into the woods. As the light touched the darkness Keisuke was suddenly alone with the one person whose death weighed the most on his shoulders. Ryosuke. He was just as he had been on the battlefield, blood covering his armour and black hair uncharacteristically messy._

_He opened his mouth, but Keisuke couldn’t bear to hear him. He covered his ears, screaming out loud. “It is all my fault, if I just had killed Takumi all of this would have never happened! Leave me to them, it’s all I deserve!”_

_Not daring to look up he stared the ground, ready to accept his fate. His brother walked to him and kneeled, laying his hand on his shoulder. He didn’t say anything. Keisuke looked at the face so familiar, remembering the carefree times they had played together as children and tears began to fall from his eyes. Ryosuke had always been the proper one. He could have achieved something great. Unlike Keisuke himself who only knew how to bring misery to anyone close to him._

_He slowly moved his brother’s hand away from his shoulder and averted his eyes. “It should have been me.”_

_His brother tugged him into a hug. Instead of warmth, coldness spread from him. He whispered two words that held more than just one meaning. “Wake up.”_

_As the words played in his mind Ryosuke released his hold and pushed him back. In the split of a moment he saw his sad smile, before falling thought the ground into a black void. He felt weightless, as if he was flowing on water. All of his thoughts washed away as he finally fell into the timeless realm of calm, relaxing sleep._

*

He slowly woke up from his slumber to the sun shining straight to his face. Before opening his eyes he tried to focus on the things around him. The sound of birds singing outside his window, water dripping from the last melting icicles on the roof. A smell of soil after a long winter. The warmth of the sun.

He gradually opened his lids. For a moment everything was blurry. The sun shined too brightly after a long time in the darkness. After a moment of adapting he looked around. He was in his own room, but the colours of the familiar space astonished him. Had the sheets always been the colour of cream, the floor such a rich dark wood and the curtains a shade of moss in the summer? He felt alive. He _was_ alive, able to see and feel all of that.

His body was stiff, and even just turning his head felt dreadful. Very carefully he tried to sit up, but a sharp pain in his left shoulder kept him from doing so. With the pain, the memories started to flow back into his tormented mind. The moment Takumi’s sword had pierced his shoulder, taking all of his arrogance away with it. The few seconds that had brought his brother to his demise. His eyes as the light of life left them.

Keisuke didn’t move, but could feel the tears gathering in his eyes, finally overflowing to his cheeks. The memory of feeling like dying but being pushed on by his brother in the dream. The agony of remembering made him furrow, and he brought his right hand to his face, firmly pressing the knuckles to his forehead. He allowed the tears to flow. Opening his mouth to a silent howl he stayed there, letting all of his grief out.

There was no telling how long it took, but finally the tears dried up and he was left with only a piercing headache, and a strange sense of tranquillity. This time, remembering not to use his left hand, he slowly got up, sitting on the side of the bed, his feet touching the smooth and cool surface of the floor. Afraid to stand up, but even more wanting to get to the water jug on his desk he took a deep breath before pushing himself up. For a second he feared the unused muscles would betray him, taking him straight to the floor, but he managed to stay up. After a moment of just standing there he took a step, and then another. Even the few meters to his desk felt like a marathon. As he sat down to his chair he was exhausted.

The water was room-temperature but tasted better than even the best wines he had ever enjoyed. Just the feeling of liquid on his parched mouth was divine. He drank the first cup in a flash, taking a second one to enjoy slowly.

A screak of the door ended his peaceful moment. It was a young housemaid he had never seen before. She stared at the empty bed, and then scanned the room. As her eyes caught Keisuke’s she dropped the tray she had been carrying, gasping surprisedly. The soup splashed everywhere. She turned and ran away without saying a word. Keisuke just looked at the mess on the floor, too tired to do anything. Taken how she had left probably meant she was fetching someone in anyways.

The skin on his face felt like someone had tightened it over the bones, and Keisuke realized he must have looked terrible. There was no way his eyes wouldn’t be red and buffy after all that wailing. There was a pile of bandages next to the water jug, so he took one of them and wet it before wiping his face. It was not much, but made him feel a bit more refreshed, and hopefully, not as miserable looking. 

Just as he laid the cloth to the table the maid returned, bringing along the granny and a man Keisuke hadn’t seen before. Granny clicked her tongue as she saw the mess, and the maid blushed, immediately starting to clean it off.

The other two walked over to him. The granny lift her wrinkly hand to his cheek, smiling. “Ya don’t burn up no more. It’s good to see ya up after bein’ only barely awake here an’ there.” She gestured at the man. “He’s the doctor takin’ care of ya.”

The man nodded. “How are you feeling?”

“My shoulder hurts if I lean on it, and I have a horrible headache.”

The doctor looked at his face and then glanced at the wet cloth. “The latter will probably go away after you get hydrated again. The first one is a more serious concern. Take off your shirt.”

Keisuke slowly did that. Fortunately the shirt was open at the front, so he didn’t have to move his shoulder too much. He stayed still as the bandages were removed from his shoulder. There were speckles of fresh, clear red blood on the white fabric, probably from moving around before. The wound still hadn’t closed all the way. Suddenly he realized he didn’t have any idea of how long it had been since the battle. Asking the question out loud, granny answered him.

“This is the sixth one since that morning. Ya was sleepin’ the whole way back home, they said.”

Just a week? He could have sworn it had been a month more likely. The doctor patted the wound with a cloth soaked in some liquid and it stinged. He flinched involuntarily.

“Now, now, please remain calm. Fast movements are the worst thing you can do to this now. Instead, try to move the fingers of your left hand carefully. Can you do that, and does it hurt?”

Keisuke moved the fingers together and then back, testing each one. “It doesn’t cause any more pain.”

The man nodded, and proceeded to carefully move his whole hand around, seeing in which positions it started to hurt. After his examination he seemed pleased. “The wound is serious, but it doesn’t seem to have hit any major nerves. You are lucky that the blade was clean and sharp, and the wound didn’t get inflamed. I spread some salve on to the wound. I’ll leave the rest here so remember to use it every time the bandage is changed.”

Keisuke nodded, waiting for him to bandage the wound again.

“I think the wound should heal quite well, but the whole arm will probably be stiff for a long time. Could be even permanently, but you will wield a sword again. Luckily it wasn’t your dominant one anyways. You can slowly start to stretch and exercise it when the bleeding ends. For now, just focus on eating well and resting, and soon it will just be an another scar alongside the others.”

Keisuke didn’t know how to feel about holding a blade again, so he didn’t answer him. As the doctor left, granny still stayed. After an oppressive silence he finally managed to speak the words that had weighed on his heart for the whole time.

“Ryosuke… Was he buried already?”

“Yes. Next to ya mother.”

Most of his guilt had been transformed into sorrow, and hearing those words ached deep inside. “And… Father. What is he doing?”

Granny seemed angry as she spoke. “He went an’ locked himself to his study. Left the buryin’ o’ his own son to others, as well as takin’ care o’ ya. Didn’t come her’ even once. Wha’ a disgrace.”

They were dangerous words for a servant to spoke of their master. From her words it seemed like his father completely ignored the situation, continuing his work as if nothing had happened. But Ryosuke had always been his favourite son, so could it be that he was just so shocked that he refused to accept his death? The accusations against him echoed in Keisuke’s mind. Suddenly he remembered something.

“Say granny, weren’t you already working here when mother died? What happened back then?”

She paled a bit, and hesitated before answering, this time whispering as she spoke. “He banned everyon’ of talkin’ about her. Soon after most o’ the servants got replaced. I was a maid back the’ and transferred inta the kitchen. Someho’ it got overlooked.”

“So… Do you remember how she died?”

Granny had to wipe some tears from her eyes before she could answer. “I was not here that day, but I heard that som’ brute killed her in the garden’. I think there was also som’ other gentlewoman accompanying her. Such a cruel play o’ destiny.”

Keisuke’s head ached even more, and he rubbed his temples, trying to make sense of all this. Her words differed so much from what he could remember of that day, while the words of the Fujiwaras made sense. There was something seriously wrong about this whole matter, and he was only now starting to realize that letting Takumi live had indeed not been his biggest mistake.

*

After eating a full meal and stretching Keisuke felt much better already. Fast movements made him feel a bit dizzy, probably because of his blood loss, but moving calmly felt fine. So, he walked through the manor, heading to his father’s study, ready to confront him. He saw no one, nor hear any sounds. It felt like even the last bits of liveliness had been drained from the house. On his way he passed the doors to the many unused rooms, but one of them somehow attracted his attention. He halted in front of it, hesitating. It felt somehow familiar, as if some of the answers might be hidden behind the thick wood. He was not sure he was ready for them, but the time for hesitation was long past. Taking a deep breath he prepared for anything, laid his hand on the cold doorhandle, and pushed it down.

It hit him as soon as he saw the décor of the room. This was it. The room from his memories. The same chairs and the low table in the middle of the room. The tea set on the side table, ready to be used. Keisuke walked around the room in trance. The place was real. He stared at the floor where he remembered seeing his mother lay. The carpet that had been soaked in her blood was there no more, and the bare floor felt out of place.

He glanced to the windows, next to which the other lady had been. Unlike in all of the other rooms there were no curtains. Keisuke furrowed his brows and walked towards the windows, almost tripping into a small pile of toys that had been hidden behind a stool. Crouching down he took a wooden snake in hand, turning it around. This was his, made by the old gardener. He had made it for him after he had seen how mesmerised he was of the vipers basking in the sunlight on the garden’s rocks. Suddenly he remembered how he had given that to him.

_“Th’ real on’ is not for touchin’, hav’ this.” The old mand had said and ruffled his hair._

_Keisuke had been so happy that he had forgotten the gardener at that instant. His mother had kneeled down to him, gently asking “what do we say when someone gives a present?”_

_He had stared at her for a moment, then turned back to the gardener, almost yelling “thank you!” before running off to play with his gift._

He stared at the snake, focusing on the warmth of his mother’s smile in the memory. He stayed still for a moment, before remembering the much grimmer things was trying to make sense of. As he straightened back up something gleaming behind the leg of the side table caught his attention. He walked to the table and looked at the source. It was a gold-covered horse figure, tucked between the leg of the table and the wall. Keisuke was surprised. This was probably the only gift he had ever received from his father. He had carried it everywhere after that. At some moment he realized it had been lost, but he didn’t have any idea where. He remembered how it had filled his whole hand back then, but now it seemed so tiny. Looking at the figure he slowly remembered tucking it there himself.

_The horse had gotten stuck and wouldn’t budge no matter how hard he pulled. He had started to get angry, and not the least by the smaller boy staring at his struggles in awe. Just as he was about to give up and ask his mother for help, a woman screamed. Someone had entered the room without him noticing. Scared, he hid under the table, holding the other boy’s hand so he wouldn’t cry. The intruder was a man, judging by his tall figure. He wore all black, and Keisuke could only see his back. It was Takumi’s mother who had screamed, and the man had tossed her aside. She must have hit her head as she now laid unmoving on the floor. The man hold Keisuke’s mother by her neck. She tried to struggle but was not powerful enough. The man hit her with something and suddenly she went limp, a red stain colouring her light blue gown. The man dropped her, and wen to the other woman, hitting her too. He straightened up and looked around. Keisuke was frozen in place. They were left unnoticed only because the man was too tall to notice the small kinds under the table and walked out of the room. Keisuke didn’t dare to move for a long time, but Takumi was starting to get anxious. Finally he cried, and Keisuke decided to go to his mother._

The flashback ended. Keisuke’s hands were shaking. He gasped for air and sat down. It felt like all of that had just happened. He had been here. His mother had been there. And so had Takumi and his mother. It had happened here, not outside. There was no way he could have imagined all of this, as no one else had ever mentioned all of those details to him. He couldn’t tell if the man had been his father, but for someone to come all the way inside the manor it must have been a planned action, not a random one. Trying to calm down Keisuke slowly got back up, heading to where he had been going all along. 

*

Without bothering to knock Keisuke opened the door to his father’s study. As per usual his father sat behind his desk, reading through some papers. Though this time he also had small portrait paintings gathered around him.

He lifted his glance to Keisuke as he walked towards him. “Oh, you are finally up.”

Anger boiled in Keisuke’s mind, and he let it show. “That’s all you have to say? I was on the verge of death for days.”

“Your physique always has been your strongest suit.”

Keisuke didn’t want to linger on that, so he pushed on. “What about Ryosuke? I heard you didn’t even bury him yourself.”

“He served well. It is a shame he died. But still, there are more pressing matters.”

Keisuke couldn’t believe his ears. He showed no emotion, it was as if he was talking about a dog, not his own son. He had always believed that even when their father didn’t show any love for him, he had that for Ryosuke at least, maybe hidden well, but still existing. He spit out his question with rage. “What could be more pressing than that?”

“This” he said and gestured to the papers and portraits scattered around the table.

Keisuke got closer to look at them, soon realizing that all of the picture were of young women, and the papers listed their relatives and wealth. He slowly raised his eyes again. “…Who is getting married.”

“You are, since your brother got killed. With your pitiful performance in the battle this is the least you can do.”

Keisuke stared at him, shocked. “You are just replacing him with me?”

”Why do you think I had two sons instead of one?”

He couldn’t get a word out of his mouth. Had his father never seen either of them as anything else than assets? The more he thought about it, the more reasonable the accusations started to seem. He couldn’t keep quiet and blurted out the pressing question.

“Who killed our mother?”

His father looked straight at him. “Some runaway soldier.”

“How could that have happened? She died here, on this house. The parlour on the second floor.”

His father raised a brow. “What are you talking about? She died in the forest.”

Keisuke tried to organize his thoughts but failed to make them into a coherent sentence. His father waited for a moment, looking at him, but then sighed and got up. He walked to Keisuke and handed him the list of wife candidates, saying “Look this through”. Without waiting for an answer he walked out, leaving Keisuke alone.

He watched as the door closed behind the King. He definitely was not normal, and Keisuke couldn’t believe it had taken this long for him to realize that. He suddenly understood that he had never actually second-guessed his father before the Fujiwaras had managed to ignite that idea in his mind. And even then he had decided to trust him, resulting in all of that had happened. It was not Keisuke himself who should feel responsible for Ryosuke’s life. There was no exchange between his and Takumi’s life. All of that been brought on by their father, who pushed on with this meaningless battle. As a lord his desire of the Fujiwara land might have been justified, but as the King? Their lands ultimately brought goods and wealth straight to him. There was no logical reason to overthrow the lord, unless there really were some secrets he knew, and thus needed to be cleaned out of the way.

Keisuke though about his life. As Ryosuke had been brought up as the heir of the lord’s title, he had been raised to fight, to kill, for their family. Ever since he could remember he had been outside training while his brother sat inside learning about whatever it was lords needed to know. Without his mother, there hadn’t been anyone who could have opposed his father. He was the head of the house, and no one dared to tell him how to raise his children. It was mostly thanks to the granny and Ryosuke that he had remained some compassion to people at all. His father had wanted him to become a ruthless soldier. The scars covering his body told their story of how he had earned his skills. And he had been content with that. Spending days with papers and ruling over peasants had never been anything he was interested in.

He had killed his first man when he was fifteen. A minor nobleman who had defied his lord, and even injured him as they had been hunting. Since then he had done it more times than he dared to think. Fair duals had slowly changed into stealthy mission, turning him into an assassin. A dark shadow that scared every nobleman in their province to be faithful to their lord.

Keisuke stared at the family emblem in the upper corner of the paper his father had handed to him. A bridge. To represent the ability to make compromises and coexists peacefully. _What a joke_ , he thought bitterly, grumbling the paper into a tight ball, and tossing in into the fireplace.

*

He had made up his mind as he headed back to his own room. He packed some essentials to a bag and flung it to his back, flinching as he moved his left shoulder too fast. Next he sneaked into the kitchen. Granny was there, alongside some other servants, busy preparing for dinner. Bitterly thanking his skills Keisuke managed to snitch some food to his bag. He longed to talk about all of this with her but didn’t want to get her into trouble after they would notice his disappearance.

Luck was on his side as he continued on to the stables. All of the boys were out, probably moving the horses, but his own one stood there on her stall. He walked to her, patting her head. “It seems like we both managed to get out of that battlefield, huh.”

The mare blew air to his face and gently pushed him. He couldn’t help but to smile. “Come on then, we have things to do.”

Somehow he managed to saddle up his mount, despite the sharp pain it caused on his shoulder. He could feel the blood flowing out again but ignored it, the time for resting would come later. After checking that the yard seemed desolated he led her outside and got up to the saddle. Glancing at the graveyard he saw the new black headstone shining in the sun. Sending his brother the promise of coming back to greet him after he had seen this through, he rushed his horse on. He had no idea where he was heading, but anywhere was better than near his father. He needed to get away to find the person he could be without others affecting his decisions.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A new chapter after over a month of nothing? Yay for that! Though I'm still busy with finishing my thesis I managed to have some time for my hobbies too. Hopefully soon I'll be able to pour even more energy into this >:D I have so many scenes planned for this story and can't wait to write those already.  
> Also, once again this chapter is longer than any other before, so enjoy! I highly appreciate kudos, but if you want to brighten my day even more please don't hesitate to leave a comment ☺️ it doesn't have to be anything grand either, just tell me if there was a scene you liked or your thoughts of the progression of the story.

_‘Sometimes the enemies get closer to your heart than your loved ones.’_

Takumi stared at the flames of the campfire and though about the words one of his ancestors had written on his notes of some past war. He had read them a long time ago, not really grasping what the writer had meant. However, the day of the battle had brought them back to his mind and now wouldn’t leave him alone as he slowly started to understand their meaning. After he had left Keisuke on the battlefield, the feeling of emptiness had slowly started to gnaw on his mind, growing more and more pressing by each passing day. Like there was something missing. Despite the fact that it had been pure anger he had felt towards him, those thoughts had still occupied a lot of his mind. But the fateful bond that had held them tightly together, despite almost getting both of them killed, was now broken. The injury was severe enough to keep Keisuke away from the battles that would undoubtedly follow at some point, so they had no reason to meet again.

The flames danced over the charring logs, their mesmerizing movement luring his mind back to the battlefield, to the moment where he had had Keisuke’s life, and everything that ever was between them in his hands.

_He stood with a blade on his hand, staring down at Keisuke, unsure of what to do next. Bright red blood flowed from the wound to the armour, painting it in the colour of both life and death. Keisuke did nothing to stop the bleeding, his head hanging down heavily. He had given up. The contrast to all of the fierceness and skill he had showed just moments ago was so stark that it frightened Takumi, holding him back. The logical side of his mind kept telling that he should get rid of his enemy now, to end all of this. And he had reasons to listen to that side. This was a man that had burned down the village, serving the King who wanted to destroy all of the Fujiwara family. Despite him owing his life to Takumi he had held a dagger on his neck. Sweat constantly dripped over the wound, stinging and reminding him of that. Even as the assassin had ultimately decided to spare him, his anger hadn’t fully subdued. At the same moment they had met on the battlefield it had started to burn hotter than ever before. He hadn’t thought of anything, his body moving on its own. Only as he had brought his opponent to his knees did the flames cool down. His blade now felt heavy on his hand, heavier that it had ever been. The blood covering the metal slowly flowed down, forming small droplets on the tip before dropping to the ground._

_He had grown up in a time of peace, never facing this kind of a situation before. With his newfound calmness he realized he just couldn’t bring himself to end a man who wouldn’t even look at him. Acting on a whim he closed the distance separating them, lifting his chin up with the sword. The blood smeared to his face, but he didn’t inflict any new wounds. He looked straight to his eyes and what he saw shocked him more than he wanted to acknowledge. It was as if all of Keisuke’s feelings had already left him, as if he didn’t care about anything anymore. Takumi tightened his hold of his sword. He should end him, and never look back again. But there was something holding him from doing that. He was so thoroughly defeated, ready to die, and he couldn’t accept that. Memories of their meetings flashed through his mind. Feelings of delight, hope, betrayal, anger and… grief. The sorrow on his eyes as he had remembered something from the day their mothers had died. Him going against his orders, letting him live. It was like a flicker of hope in the darkness, a small sign that he indeed felt something and was starting to consider things more. Takumi couldn’t help but to feel there was something he should still achieve, instead of becoming a meal for the crows in that battlefield. So, he loosened his grip on his swords, instead using his words as a blade against him. He chose the words that he felt would hurt him the most, hopefully pushing him out of his daze. “Go. Serve your king. Waste your life.”_

_Keisuke’s eyes widened and Takumi could finally see some emotion returning to him. There. He had done the most he could. So, he turned his back to him, not giving him another glance. Only time would tell if this was the right choice, or if he were to regret it._

Someone threw a new log into the fire, the sudden noise snapping him out of his memories. He looked up and saw his father sitting down next to him. He took his pipe from his pocket, filled and lit it before talking. “We ride back home at dawn.”

Takumi raised his brows in surprise. For the past week they had been moving alongside the border, trying to figure out what the King’s forces were going to do. They had scattered away from the battlefield, seemingly in small groups rather than as one big force. The Fujiwara side had won the battle, but the King surely wouldn’t leave it at that. Even more unnervingly they weren’t exactly sure why they had won. The battle had still been ongoing as the King suddenly retreated his forces. It seemed something was going on behind their lines, but no reports came through of what that was, so Takumi argued back. “But we still don’t know what their plan is.”

“True. But it takes a long time to gather all of their men back for another big attack. We’ll leave some of our men alongside the border to keep watch for any movement, so we can act when they move. For the rest…The snow has melted, and they are needed in the fields. We can’t risk losing this year’s harvest even before it’s sown.”

Takumi realized he was right. As per usual his father had managed to take things that hadn’t even crossed his mind into account. An army couldn’t march on empty stomach, and neither could anyone else. There was still many things he needed to learn from him before even thinking about taking the responsibilities of a lord to his own shoulders.

He stood up, his left knee still feeling a bit stiff after the hit from falling with his horse in full armour. The adrenaline rush of the battle had masked the pain in the moment, but it had slightly bugged him ever since. “I’ll ready my horse for a long ride then.”

Bunta let his son leave, still looking after him as he disappeared behind the tents.

*

The morning and the day following it were particularly dreary ones. Heavy grey clouds that had covered the sky in the morning had started to drizzle water almost as soon as they had left the camp, and the light pour had slowly turned into rain. Even Iketani’s attempts of starting a conversation felt pointless to Takumi. After a moment of trying the knight sighed and they rode on quietly for the rest of the day.

By the time the familiar buildings of the town greeted them Takumi was already drenched and chilled to the bone. They slowly went through the muddy streets, without running into anyone. The town almost felt deserted, but Takumi caught the glimpses of candlelight behind closed blinds that assured him that all sensible people were just hiding from the weather. As if hearing his thoughts the rain started to pour even harder, hiding the further buildings behind a curtain of grey. The sun was probably just about to set somewhere behind the clouds, taking away the last of the light they had had for the day.

As he followed his father through the gate to their yard he suddenly saw the first unfamiliar living being in the whole day. A man dressed in a long, dark cloak with a hood covering his head, sitting on the saddle of a beautiful black stallion, which took restless steps and waved his head around. It was as if he was a ghost wandering around in that miserable weather. It seemed like the servants hadn’t even noticed him, as no one had come to greet him. The man had been staring at the main building, but the voices from the Fujiwara entourage caught his attention and he turned his head. His eyes caught Takumi’s and he was surprised by their blackness.

The man turned his eyes to Bunta, who looked at him without saying anything. He hopped down and started to walk towards them, leading his horse behind. The wet woollen fabric slipped down heavily as he unveiled his face and moved the cape to show them the silver embroidery on his jacket. A group of smaller stars, and a straight line going through them. The emblem of the Nakazato family, the rulers of northernmost part of the kingdom that was sometimes also called the night province for the darkness that didn’t lift at all during winter.

“My father send me.”

Bunta nodded. “Let’s talk inside.”

That alone seemed to explain everything to him, but Takumi was still confused. The man seemed about the right age to be the son of the current lord, but why would he had sent him so far from home, into an area the King claimed traitorous? Trying to figure out the situation he followed the two silently as they took their horses into the stable, unable to help himself from catching glimpses of the man. The flickering light of the candles only enhanced the darkness of his features, contrasting the pale skin. He seemed like a piece of moonlit night that had been made human. Takumi’s mind wandered, comparing him to Keisuke, whose golden hair and bright blue eyes had made him feel like a ray of sunlight even in darkness. He shook his head slightly to chase the thought away.

Lifting his head again he caught Nakazato looking straight at him, a bit of wonder in his eyes, but neither of them said anything. It was Bunta who broke the silence. “Takumi, get him some dry clothes, you are the same height so yours probably fit. Meet me at the tearoom after that.”

He didn’t object, instead just turning to the man, saying “Follow me” after he had handed his horse to a stable boy who finally came from somewhere.

*

Takumi opened the chest where his clothes laid neatly folded. He tossed aside the fancier, embroidered jackets with the wisteria emblem, as well as the old worn down clothes he used at the forest. He noticed Nakazato’s eyes staying on them for a moment longer than on other things, as well as in the hunting bow that hang on the wall and the pair of old boots that were carelessly tossed halfway under the bed.

Takumi pulled out a pair of black pants alongside with a basic white shirt and a towel. Handing them out he said the first words ever since they had left the stable “Leave your clothes here, someone will take them to be washed.” He gestured to the folding screen on the corner of the room, which was usually more for decoration than use. “You can change there.”

“Thank you.”

Takumi smiled a bit in answer and turned back to the chest to grab himself a similar outfit. He had to basically peel the drenched clothes off himself. The feeling of dry, soft fabric against his skin felt heavenly, but also suddenly made him realize how cold he was.

“Let’s go, some food and a lit fireplace will surely make us feel much better.”

“Sounds good.”

As they walked through the manor Takumi couldn’t help but to start asking questions. “So… Are you the son of lord Nakazato? My father seemed to recognize you.”

“Yes, my given name is Takeshi, but everyone just refers to me by my family name. I met lord Fujiwara briefly at the capital during this winter.”

_This winter? So it had to be during the election of the king. He’s here now so…_

“Our province was one of the other ones who wouldn’t support lord Takahashi.”

Takumi flinched. It was as if he had read his thoughts. “I see. But how he dared to send you here? Does he openly defy the King?”

“No. Not yet at least. He just trusted me to remain unnoticed.”

He raised his brow, questioning that in his mind. _Are all of the other heirs along the lines of spies and assassins, sneaking in the darkness? What the hell is this._ Not saying anything he led the way through the main corridor, instead of the smaller, hidden shortcut ways meant for servants that he usually opted for. The walls were filled with official portraits of the past generations and beautiful sceneries from the lands of the province. It had been ages since Takumi had last seen them, so he briefly glanced at them as they walked past. He recognized most of the places, but also knew of some even more beautiful areas, hidden in the woods, away from roads and villages.

They had to go through the lord’s study into the private tearoom, and as Takumi walked into the familiar room the largest of the paintings caught his attention. It was of his mother, him as a baby on her arms. He had seen the portrait numerous times before, but not for a long while. The sight of it now brought the dream he had had at the cabin in the beginning of the winter back to his mind, as well as the warnings she had spoken. Without realizing Takumi had halted, staring at the face so familiar, yet so distant. _This is not the time to reminiscence the past._ He told himself, tearing his eyes from the canvas, turning to Nakazato, only to find him equally mesmerized by another painting. It was a much smaller one, almost hidden away next to the bookshelf. In the painting were two young women picking flowers, one with hair a colour of rich chocolate, and the another one with golden locks. Takumi felt like someone was preventing him from breathing. The first lady was much younger than in the bigger painting, but undoubtedly the same person. His mother. Alongside her… that must have been Keisuke’s mother. Not just by the hair, but her other features too were painfully similar to her son. 

Nakazato glanced at him and raised his brows. “Do you know who she is?” He asked while pointing at the late lady Takahashi.

“I… Do you?”

He turned his eyes back at the painting. “I met her a couple of times when I was younger.”

“Oh, I see.”

They stayed still, silent for a moment, before Takumi realized something and couldn’t help but to say that out loud. “They are at faerie valley.”

He was answered with a confused look.

“It’s a place where flowers naturally bloom better than anywhere else, so it’s called the garden on faeries. It’s on the border of the provinces, just on the side of the Takahashi lands.”

“The pretties place of the province… fitting for the ruling family.”

They stared at the painting for a moment more, before Nakazato turned his gaze to Takumi. “Have you visited the Takahashi province often?”

“Not really. Only through the woods.”

He furrowed his brows. “What’s there to do in there?”

Takumi returned his gaze. “Does there need to be something to do? In the woods the days run at their own pace and it’s calming.”

He didn’t answer, and Takumi didn’t know how to continue the conversation. After a moment of focusing on the paintings he again remembered why they were there in the first place. So, he walked to the inner door and into the tearoom, where a crackling fire and the smell of freshly baked bread greeted him. Nakazato followed behind him without saying a word.

Bunta was already there, sipping a cup of tea. Takumi headed straight to the table and gathered himself a plateful of food before sitting down in one of the large chairs next to the fire, the other man following his example. Only after they finished their food did Bunta start to ask the questions.

“What’s the situation with the Takahashi’s? We haven’t gotten any new information ever since the battle.”

Nakazato stayed quiet for a moment, thinking about where to start. “The crown prince is dead, and his younger brother is missing. Though the King hasn’t addressed either case in public, so most people believe everything to be all right.”

Takumi’s eyes widened as he realized what he had said, and he couldn’t stop himself. “What happened to Keis… I mean to both of them?”

He noticed Nakazato clenching his fists as he intently stared at the flames and answered in almost pained voice. “For Ryosuke it was just a cruel twist of fate. A stray arrow flew longer than anyone could have expected. He died on the battlefield. For the younger one… He was seriously injured and taken to their manor to be treated, after which he just vanished. No one knows where he went.”

Takumi was flustered, thinking about how he was behind Keisuke’s wounds, and also might have sarked something in him to cause his disappearance. For Ryosuke he couldn’t feel much remorse. In his mind there wasn’t anything else related to him than the burned ruins of a once lively village. Still, he couldn’t help but to wonder why Nakazato seemed to know so much while they were completely in the dark. “Are you sure all of this is true?”

“Ryosuke and I studied together in the capital. I still have contacts to their house.”

“Oh.”

That seemed believable, and he didn’t have any more questions left. After a moment of silence Bunta opened his mouth. “Did the King seem affected by all of this?”

Takumi was sure Nakazato’s nails were already painfully tugging into his fist. “No, not really. It seems he is planning to get married as soon as possible. He rode to capital a day after Keisuke went missing and doesn’t seem to miss him or anything, even as he is now the crown prince.”

Takumi absentmindedly tore pieces from the slice of bread he still had on his plate. The King really seemed to be the worst of the bunch. He couldn’t help but to think what kind of an upbringing Keisuke had gotten. Which was the real him, the one he had seen at the cabin, or the one after that? The other two kept on talking, but Takumi’s mind was preoccupied with thoughts of a certain pale haired assassin. The pile of breadcrumbs on his plate kept on growing, already passing the original piece in mass.

*

After a long night of talking Takumi was finally resting on his own bed. He felt useless, as there was nothing much he could do expect to rest and wait for the moves of others. But that was easier said than done. He hadn’t slept properly for the past week, and his dreams were a mess which he didn’t want to see. Even as he laid there, feeling the tiredness of his body he still tried to fight it, until he couldn’t anymore.

_He was in the clearing where they had met for the first time, looking at Keisuke eye to eye. As he tried to walk to him the scenery suddenly changed, and they were running towards each other with their swords. Takumi tripped and as he fell they were suddenly in the frozen river, him lying on the ice, holding his hand for Keisuke to grab. Just as he got the hold of it, the ice broke under him, and he was dragged under the surface. There was a moment of darkness before he suddenly awakened, floating in the icy water. His body felt heavy, but he tried his best to swim up. It was painstakingly slow, but just as he felt he was drowning he reached the surface. Gasping for air it took a moment before he recognized where he was. The pond, the same place he had dreamt of that night in the cabin. It was dark again, stormy clouds racing through the sky. The dreams details had been lost to him for a long time, until the night when Keisuke had questioned him had suddenly brought them back. He stared to the empty shore where he had seen their mothers, not seeing any sign of them now._

_A loud metallic sound from behind him caught his attention and he turned around. It was Keisuke, fallen to his knees on the shore. But it was not that what shocked Takumi the most. It was how he looked. The black armour, covered in the blood from his shoulder wound. Just as it had been in his first dream. But now he knew how he had ended up like that. It was by his own hand. Takumi stared at him in shock, and he stared back, before his eyes suddenly rolled back and he collapsed to the ground._

*

Takumi gasped for air and sat up. He was wide awake, none of the usual after-sleep drowsiness bothering him. His room was still dark and silent. Nothing seemed to have caused his waking. Deep inside him uneasiness gnawed on, and he sat up, rubbing his face. He tried to brush it off and get back to sleep but couldn’t. He tried to tell himself the dream was just a result of the news they had heard last night. However, even though he didn’t usually believe on dreams being signs of anything, the fact that he had seen Keisuke’s wounded state before it ever happening felt way too weird. He had even worn the armour in his family colours. That was somethings he couldn’t have known back then, as he hadn’t had any idea of his real identity. Unless his unconsciousness had somehow managed to connect him with the memories of his childhood that he couldn’t even bring to his mind anymore.

Considering the fact that his first dream had partially come true, seeing Keisuke collapse felt… frightening. Was he out there, dying at this very moment? At a place just next to the manor? Takumi couldn’t stay still anymore. Even if it was just a ridiculous dream he had to check. He got up and walked to his window. As he opened it he froze still. It was the moment where the night was just about to meet dawn. The rain had stopped, but some dark clouds still hanged on the sky. Even the weather was similar to his dream. Without thinking any longer Takumi turned on his heels, rushing to get some clothes on before he ran out.

In his haste Takumi forgot to be as discreet as he usually was while sneaking out. That small lapse in his judgement came crushing to him as he almost collided with Iketani, who was standing on guard on the front door. After the initial shock the knight managed to speak.

“Whoa there, I didn’t expect anyone to attack me from inside. What are you doing?”

“I…” Takumi suddenly realized how insane all of this sounded _. I must go to the pond because I think one of our enemies might be dying there. I saw it in a dream you see. What the hell?_ He cleared his throat before continuing. “I need to check something.”

Iketani looked rightfully doubtful. “It couldn’t wait until morning?”

“I couldn’t sleep anymore so why not now.”

That didn’t manage to convince him. “You sure don’t look like you just happened to wake up and pass time by checking something. Your hair is a mess and your jacket not even buttoned correctly.”

Takumi looked at himself and realized he was right but didn’t care. “Whatever. I am going.”

Iketani reached out and hold him by his wrist as he tried to leave. “No you are not. Guarding you is my job.”

Takumi yanked himself free of his hold and continued on, talking to him over his shoulder. “Come along if you must. I am going.” He turned ahead and didn’t see how Iketani sighed frustratedly before following him.

He headed straight to the back wall and climbed over it by the wines without any trouble. Behind him Iketani cursed slightly as his armour made it much harder. Without waiting for him Takumi headed on to the small path that lead to the pond. The large, thick bushes made it even darker, and he barely saw anything before entering the forest itself, where the trees grew further from each other, and some moonlight managed to shine through the leafless branches.

As he approached the groove where the pond was, something suddenly caught his attention. A pale horse, walking through the woods, eating some early spring plants here and there. She had a saddle and reins on, but no humans were on sight. The morning mist lingering on the forest floor made her movements even more eerie. Iketani had just reached him and noticed the horse too. He paled a bit, his voice wavering as he whispered. “Is that a ghost?”

Takumi didn’t answer, but began to slowly approach the horse, careful not to spook her. As he got closer he realized he had seen the mare before. From far away her colour could have been mistaken for white, but it was actually a colour of soft, creamy beige. As she turned her face to him he saw the white blaze covering it. This was Keisuke’s mount. He managed to get close enough to catch the reins to his hand. The horse seemed calm, and happily pushed him with her head. Iketani got to them, eyeing the mare. “So… she’s real at least. But not from our stables. What on earth is going on?”

“I have to check something. Hold her for me.”

Takumi handed over the reins and rushed towards the pond. He hadn’t actually been there in years, but the playground of his childhood looked exactly like it had back then, and as it had been in his dreams. He carefully walked downhill, taking care to notice tree roots and rocks on the ground to avoid tripping. As he closed into the waterline he realized this was the side where he had seen her mother, opposite of where Keisuke had been.

The pond was not big, around ten meters in diameter and circular in shape. It was surprisingly deep, and the water clear as glass. The shores were covered in sand and larger boulders. And there, between the rocks of the other side laid something that didn’t seem to belong there. Takumi’s heartbeat fastened and he started to run.

As he got closer he realized it was almost just as he had seen in his dream. Keisuke laid on the ground on his back, his face furrowed by the pain even as he was unconscious. Instead of his armour he had simple black clothes, the material around his shoulder intact. The something that had prevented Takumi from dealing the finishing blow on the battlefield took over completely as he grouched next to him. He touched his forehead, surprised by how it felt. “You are burning up” he muttered.

Still, at least that meant he was alive. Takumi carefully tried to shake him awake, but that didn’t work. As he lifted his hand he realized that the dampness he had felt was not from water, but blood. The wound had been bandaged, but not yet healed, and was slowly bleeding through the fabric. Cursing, he yelled to Iketani, despite knowing that the loud voice would alert anyone in the area of them being there. “Oi, get over here!”

It took a moment as he circled around the pond, to get to the side where the decline was much less steep than where Takumi had gone through. He even managed to bring the mare with him. As he saw them he quickly tied the reins into a branch and ran the rest of the way.

As he recognized Keisuke’s face he was left speechless. His mouth was open as his eyes switched between the two. “H-how..?” He finally managed to mumble.

“It’s not important now. Just help me get him to the horse.”

Iketani looked suspicious. “What are you going to do? You can’t exactly just bring one of the members of the Takahashi family to your home.”

“We’ll take him to the old healer, she likes me. She’ll surely cooperate.”

“Really? To take _him_ to an old woman? There is no telling what he’ll do!”

“Oh come on, he seems to be on death’s door, he won’t do anything.”

The knight seemed to reluctantly agree to that, and finally helped Takumi to lift the man up. It was a struggle to get him up to horseback, but they finally managed by Takumi getting up first, then holding Keisuke in place in front of him. Luckily the mare was able to hold them both.

In the meanwhile the sun had started to rise to the skyline, lightening the clouds. They had to hurry if they were to get to the healer’s cottage without being seen.

*

Iketani knocked on the wooden door of the small stone cottage and helped Takumi and Keisuke down from horseback as they waited for the healer to answer. It took only a moment for her to open the door. She was a small lady, her hair already completely silver but mind still as sharp as ever. She eyed the odd bunch a moment before asking “What can I do for you this time, young master?”

Takumi usually tried to correct her to use his name instead of titles, but this time there were more pressing matters. “He needs treatment. He has high fever and a bleeding wound.”

“Fine. Bring him in.”

They carried Keisuke inside to the narrow bed reserved to patients. Luckily there wasn’t anyone else in there already. The healer collected different herbs to a mortar in the back of the room. Takumi pulled Iketani outside, speaking in low voice. “Take the mare to our stables and see that she is taken care of.”

“To the manor? Won’t someone notice that right away?”

“Rumours are bound to spread if you take her to the tavern’s stable. It’ll be far less suspicious if we happen to have a new horse suddenly.”

“Fine, you are right. I’ll make something up for the stable boys.”

“Make haste. I’ll stay here for a moment but will be back for breakfast, hopefully dad won’t suspect anything. I want to keep this from him for now.”

Iketani seemed to disagree with the last part, but after seeing the determination in Takumi’s eyes just nodded. “Fine. For now.”

He jumped into the saddle and rode away. Takumi watched him go before returning back in. The healer had cut open Keisuke’s jacket and the blood-soaked bandages from his shoulder. She was just examining the wound and shared her thoughts in a disapproving tone. “Tsk. The wound had already started to heal but has reopened. He strained himself way too much whilst he should have been stayin’ still. Luckily someone had treated it well before, otherwise he might not be with us anymore. It’s a nasty one.”

Takumi felt a bit ashamed hearing those last words. “Do you think he’ll heal?”

“With a good rest and my potions I think so.” She didn’t pry further but focused on spreading some kind of herbal mix to the wound. “Go and fetch some cold water from the well.”

Takumi did as he was told, and as he returned she had bandaged the wound again. Soaking a cloth in the water he placed that on Keisuke’s forehead.

“Do you have any idea how long it’ll take for him to wake up?”

“Might be a few hours, or days. It depends on his determination.”

Takumi stayed silent for a moment, thinking through the situation. Keisuke was clearly so weak right now that he probably couldn’t hurt the healer even if he were to wake up and want to. And he had a hard time believing he would even try. He was mostly worried of him being so confused about the situation that he might try to run away.

“Don’t let him move.”

“That goes without sayin’, he is my patient now and I aim to see him make a full recovery.”

“Good. I’ll get back here as soon as I can.”

*

Takumi barely managed to get back to his house in time for breakfast. His left knee ached from the running, and he was out of breath. Trying to calm down before walking into the dining room didn't help much as his father still noticed his nervousness right away. Nakazato was there too, cracking a boiled egg and carefully picking the pieces of shell away. He just nodded to Takumi as a greeting.

As soon as Takumi sat down Bunta opened his mouth. “Exercising the first thing in the morning?”

“Uh… yeah. I couldn’t sleep.”

“And might that have something to do with Iketani being scolded for leaving his position?”

“He did? I’ll talk to the head of guards. It was my fault.”

Nakazato had quietly finished his meal as they had spoken, but now suddenly rose up. “Thank you for your hospitability. I must leave soon and will go tend to my horse before that.” He turned to Bunta and bowed slightly. “I’ll go through the plan as we discussed yesterday.”

Bunta nodded absentmindedly. “Good. I’m sure we’ll meet again.”

Nakazato nodded back and turned to Takumi. “It was good to finally meet you.”

“It was my pleasure.”

Nakazato left, and the two men left in the room gathered some food on their plates and started to eat before Bunta spoke again. “You know I let you do as you see best for the most part, but at times like this you’d do well to be a bit more careful. You wouldn’t be the first nobleman being targeted by an assassin in times of war.“

Takumi’s heart skipped a beat as he heard his father’s words, and he almost choked on his tea. His father looked at him a bit surprised as he desperately coughed, trying to get his breath back to normal. Finally he managed to mutter an answer. “Right.”

There was no way he was telling he had indeed already been targeted, and even more stupidly, now wanted to nurse the very person behind that back into health for reasons he didn’t even quite understand himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The musical recommedation for the day is a band called Strum und Drang and especially their song called Indian, the story of which really fit's Keisuke's character in this fic (at least partially). The members of the band were just 15-16 years old when the first album was released, and it's still so good!


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more update for 2020 👀 Happy new year for all of you! aka hyvää uutta vuotta kaikille!

After breakfast Takumi picked up a pile of documents that needed to be distributed to the town merchants and told his father he was going to do that. Usually such tasks were left for the servants, but Bunta didn’t ask why he was so eager to do that, and just waved his hand as Takumi already hurried out of the study room. The manor seemed almost too normal considering that the threat of the King had concretised in the battlefield. The servants walked around with fresh laundry, shined the silverware, dusted the decorations of the hallways or sat outside, embroidering fabrics. However, the calmness of the situation was somewhat broken down when he looked closer to what they were doing. The freshly washed sheets of fabric were cut into long, thin lines of bandages and the embroidery was of the wisteria emblem, done for the jackets of higher officers. Preparations for the continuation of the war.

He headed out and walked past the training field. The vice commander of the guards oversaw practice as usual, but instead of the usual one-on-one combat they seemed to train attacking and blocking in groups, imitating a more realistic scenario of a battle. Only one person was taken to the side from the group practice. His back was to Takumi, and the commander of the guards relentlessly attacked him. He recognized Iketani by his blocking style and changed his direction towards him. He walked to the fighting men and halted to observe. The fight must had been ongoing for a while already, as the knight was drenched, and his hands had started to shake lightly. The commander didn’t show any mercy, more than anything just attacking faster.

He noticed the moment that decided the outcome of the battle. Iketani took a step to the side, trying to predict his opponents actions. The movement was done a second too early, leaving time for the commander to act. He swung his sword, lifting it up to his neck. The point of the blade just touched Iketani’s skin, as the older man said. “Dead.”

Takumi felt like all of his blood suddenly rushed away from his head as he looked at the scene that eerily reminded him of the moment when he had decided to let Keisuke live. He stood frozen still even as Iketani lowered his sword and yielded. The commander looked straight at Takumi before bowing. “Young master, what brings you here?”

His words managed to pull him out of his trance, and he lightly shook his head before answering. “If you are punishing him for last night you can stop. I ordered him to leave his post.”

Iketani looked a bit surprised behind the commander, but Takumi didn’t look at him for longer as the commander already answered. “You want to take the blame then? Fine.”

He hold out his hand to Iketani, who a bit hesitantly handed over the sword he had used. The commander took it by the blade, pointing the handle to Takumi. “It’s been a while.”

He took the sword and weighed it on his hand, then looking at the commander. Even in his older days he was still one of the best fighters in the province, who had been training younger knights for years already, Takumi alongside them. “It has.”

“Ready then.”

Takumi put down the papers he had carried and threw his coat over them to prevent them from flying away. He walked away from them and circled his neck around to wake up the muscles. Without giving him more time the commander attacked, forcing Takumi to take a few steps back. Their swords clashed and Takumi felt the vibrations going through his body. Yet again he was dragged into his memories, and the brown eyes looking at him turned blue in his mind.

The commander seemed to notice something was off as he furrowed his eyebrows. However, it wasn’t a good enough reason for him to stop the duel. He stepped to the side, pushing Takumi to the opposite direction. Regaining his senses again he acted on instinct, lowering his blade and then swinging it up as he stepped towards the commander. The swing was blocked, but he had expected that much from his old teacher. Metal screeched as Takumi slid his blade up without breaking the contact of the swords. He directed the commander’s weapon away from himself before aiming for his side. It didn’t work, as he stepped away from his reach and then took a quickstep towards him, aiming between his collarbones. Takumi could have avoided the hit if he had moved fast enough, but he couldn’t. The move was too similar to the one he had used to defeat Keisuke, and he froze still as it was now directed towards himself. The commander’s blade stopped so close to his skin that even a slip of paper wouldn’t have fit in between. He repeated the word he had said to Iketani a moment before. “Dead”.

Takumi’s hand dropped and he only just managed to keep his hold of the sword as he weakly whispered. “Almost”

The commander frowned as he looked at him. He lowered his sword and stepped closer, forcing him to look at his eyes. “First battles always leave the deepest scars. Whatever you faced on that battlefield can’t be changed anymore, so you’ll just have to make peace with yourself. If you continue to just think about it all day you’ll end up dead in an actual battle. Without your absentmindedness the victory would have been yours.”

Takumi nodded weakly. “Thank you. I’ll keep that in mind.”

The commander smiled and patted Takumi’s back with such force he almost felt like taking a step forward. “You’ll be all right boy. You have great potential.”

Takumi felt embarrassed, a light blush creeping up to his face. “Uh, thanks.”

The commander left him and turned to Iketani. “Your basic skills are good, but you need more stamina. Run around estate every morning, be it sun or rain.”

He straightened up and bowed slightly. “Yes sir.”

The older man patted his shoulder too and headed to the other knights. For a moment they looked behind him, before Iketani turned to Takumi. “I haven’t seen you lose in ages, are you all right?”

Takumi stared into the void. “Yeah, I just have a lot on my mind.”

“To say the least. What will you do with, you know, _him_?”

“For now just wait for him to wake up I guess. After that I need to decide if he’s to be trusted. Nakazato said he had disappeared from home. I’m not sure if this is just a clever scheme or if he did it by his own volition.”

“Do you think he really would escape? He’s now the crown price, why would anyone leave a position such as that?”

Takumi looked at him dead serious. “I would change places with a common hunter any day.”

Iketani rubbed the back of his head, a bit ashamed. “Well, yeah, but by what we know he seems to be devoted to his father.”

“He really seems, but things might change. We must put his devotion to the test.”

*

Keisuke was still sleeping when Takumi got back to the healer’s house. He had basically run from one house to an another to deliver the papers before returning to the healer’s cabin because he had been nervous of him waking up when only the healer was present. She didn’t share his worry, instead just noting that there wasn’t anything more she could do for him, and now they only had to wait. As the healer left for the marketplace Takumi was left alone with Keisuke. He pulled out a stool, sat down next to the bed and looked at the man lying in it. The soft light of morning sun shined through the windows, making the dust dancing in the air visible. His hair gleamed in a golden hue, and his skin looked like it had been carved out of marble. The old scars going around his upper body were even whiter than his skin. Even as the wounds had healed the marks stayed there to remind him of what had happened. In contrast to his paleness the shadows under his eyes looked like someone had coloured them with coal. He almost looked… fragile. As if a touch could break him. Almost to prove himself wrong Takumi carefully touched his healthy shoulder. The skin still felt burning hot, but soft, and he didn’t react to the touch in any way.

The moment reminded Takumi of the morning in the cabin. The scars he had wondered about now made much more sense. He was an assassin, and he himself had witnessed his skills first-hand. He hadn’t had any idea someone might have been anywhere near him at that night before the battle, as he went to look after his mare. He had really been caught off-guard, and the feeling of hopeless struggling under him really stuck with him. Without their shared past he would definitely had ended up dead in that moment, without any words exchanged. 

Whereas Takumi had lived his life in peace, only training to prepare for hypothetical wars in the future, he had been living in the darkness, fighting all the time. Suddenly he remembered how he had told him that his golden hair was seen as a good omen amongst the his people. He had laughed, but that had felt a bit forced. With everything he had learned of him since that he now realized how off his words must had sounded.

However, Keisuke was still a mystery to him, his actions contradicting each other. At this moment, was he a fried or a foe? The man in question stayed silent, not giving him any answers. So, he just stayed there, staring at him, trying to decide what he was to do when he would wake up.

He didn’t realize how much time had passed until the healer returned, bringing some freshly baked bread with her. The delicious smell woke Takumi’s hunger, and after hearing the sudden growl the healer laughed. “Wait a moment and I’ll whip up something to along with the bread. In the meantime you could change the cloth on his to a cold one, I bet the fever still hasn’t subdued.”

Takumi did as he was told, feeling his forehead in between. It was still hot, but not as burning as before. Somewhat relieved for that he placed the wetted cloth to his head.

He stayed next to Keisuke for the rest of the day. The healer didn’t say anything, instead just giving him some dried herbs from last year’s harvest. “Crumble these into smaller pieces and into this pot. After that you can start to bundle the fresh plants on the table.”

Takumi took the dried herbs and the smell of them hit him right away. It reminded him of celery and was somehow very familiar. He looked at the shrivelled leaves more closely and realized why. “Isn’t this the tall plant that grows next to the door?”

“It is. People call it Lovage, plantin' it next to the door keeps harmful spirits away.”

He was a bit doubtful of such believes, but still asked. “Really? Is the dried plant used in similar way then?”

She smiled brightly. “I don’t know, but it makes any soup taste fantastic.”

Takumi laughed out loud, for the first time in forever and she joined him. With a smile still on his face Takumi said “Well, you go do your chores and I’ll crumble up this magical spice for you.”

The healer smiled brightly and waved her hand as she walked out of the door. “Thank you my sweet boy.”

Takumi waved back and turned to Keisuke again. He crumbled the leaves on his hands, and then looked at the powder, and then Keisuke, muttering to himself. “I wonder if the plant works even in winter, or if it let a harmful spirit inside this time.”

He didn’t let such insane thoughts worry him, instead trying to hold on to the carefree feeling the laughter had brought. He hummed an old song as he worked, wetting the cloth on Keisuke’s head every now and then. Having something to do with his hands made the time flow faster, and before he realized it was already dusk.

He decided to change the cloth once more, and as he felt his forehead he got worried again. His temperature had definitely gone up again after being lower in the day. As the wet fabric touched his skin he suddenly frowned in his sleep and moved his head from side to side. Takumi tried to move the cloth into a better position but as soon as his fingers touched him he whispered, almost so quietly Takumi didn’t catch it. “No.”

He flinched back and stared at him. He calmed down again but didn’t seem to awake. A single tear fell from under his closed lids. Takumi was confused of what to do. He was not used to caring for sick people like this. Suddenly a voice from behind scared him.

“It’s all right, he’s just dreaming.”

Takumi turned and saw the healer who had returned with a wide variety of early spring plants. “His temperature is rising again.”

“I’ll look after him for the night.”

Realizing he really should get back home Takumi stood up, still a bit unsure of leaving him there. He had avoided explaining anything about who Keisuke was, but his uneasiness still showed through. The healer patted Takumi’s back. “The best thin’ you can do now is get a decent night's sleep.”

“But…”

“No excuses. Even if he were to wake up he’d be as dangerous as a kitten. With that wound, blood loss and fever it’ll take time for him to recover.”

Takumi gave in to her determination and wished her good night before going. As he opened the door, he couldn’t help but to get one final glance of the sleeping man.

*

Despite his every intention Takumi still slept restlessly, waking up countless times. Instead of running out he stayed on his bed, thinking about the same things that had haunted him for the whole day. There were so many questions he wanted to ask, but at the same time he dreaded the moment Keisuke would wake up. Last time they had met he had pierced his shoulder, as well as his spirit. How could anyone just go on after something like that? At least one thing was sure; he had to keep him close, to avoid him causing any harm to anyone around the town.

He finally fell into deep sleep a few hours before sunrise and was woken up by a servant who came into the room to collect laundry. She was one of the new maids they had hired before summer and got flustered of the situation.

“I am so sorry young master. You are always up with the sun, so I didn’t expect to see you…”

Takumi looked at her still half-asleep. She had deep brown hair, gathered into neat braids around her head, and her big dark eyes looked a bit frightened. Slowly her words sank into Takumi’s mind.

“Wait. How long it’s from the dawn?”

“A-About an hour.”

Takumi rubbed his face with his hands. How could he have overslept? Without thinking he flung his blankets away, and only then remembered he wasn’t wearing anything. The maid looked at him, blushed in a deep pink tone, muttered something and ran out of the room. Takumi could feel a blush creeping up his neck too but tried to ignore it and just rushed to get his clothes on.

His father had already finished his breakfast as Takumi arrived, and was now just drinking tea while reading some book. The covers decorated with gold and flower engravings made it seem out of place in his hands, but Takumi didn’t have time to ask about it before Bunta spoke. Raising his brow slightly he asked in his usual indifferent tone “Tired from last morning’s sudden work out?”

“Mmm.”

“Rest while you can. The situation won’t stay this quiet for long.”

“Has there been any news from the borders?”

“No.” He took a sip of tea before continuing. “But I’ll ride to meet the commander today. We have to discuss the placement of our men. You’ll stay here, and if anything happens take care of it.”

Had it been the day before Takumi would have been disappointed not to be able to leave with him, but after certain events it would have been troublesome. So, he sheepishly agreed to that, making his father look at him surprisedly. He could almost see him drawing conclusions of the situation but tried to seem uncaring as there was no way he could figure out what was really going on. 

*

After sending his father off Takumi headed to the healer’s cottage once more. Iketani knew where he went, and he took some paperwork with him. After all, where he worked didn’t matter, right?

The healer was changing the bandage around Keisuke’s shoulder as Takumi stepped in. She glanced at him and put him into work right away. “Perfect timing, I need to examine the back too, but don’t have enough strength to turn him to his side.”

Takumi walked over to them and tried to move Keisuke to his side as carefully as possible. Unlike the day before his skin felt cool to touch. The movement made him flinch in his sleep but wasn’t enough to wake him up. The healer finished her work and seemed happy with what she saw. “The bleeding has stopped, and his fever is down.”

“So he is going to heal?”

“It seems like it, but everything can still happen.” She said and knocked on the wooden stool she sat on without thinking it.

Takumi frowned. “So… Is there anything preventing him for waking up?”

She looked straight at him. “Even as his body heals, his mind migh’ need more time. These thing’ are not determined by physique alone. He’ll wake up when he’s ready.”

Takumi couldn’t help to feel like some of her words had been directed to himself as well and picked up his papers from the floor to avoid her gaze. “I see.”

She didn’t pressure him anymore, instead standing up and collecting her things from the table. “I’ll leave you to him then, I see you brought your own work today.”

Without waiting for an answer she walked out of the door, leaving Takumi alone with his thoughts and the man who occupied most of them. He sat down on the stool again, looking at him. The papers laid forgotten on his lap as he thought of the first two times they had met. What Keisuke had been doing on their lands, had his plan been to get to know him all along? But for what? Had lord Takahashi been planning his attack so far ahead? But that would also mean he had been behind the assassination of the late king…

His thoughts were only confusing Takumi more, and he just stared at the man who still didn’t move and kept the answers to his questions hidden. After a while he sighed and picked up the first paper from his pile. ‘ _The taxation of merchants trading in wool’_ He read and sighed even deeper. This would be a long day.

*

Hours later Takumi put down the last of the papers, closed his ink bottle and flexed his aching shoulders. He had worked nonstop to get his thoughts away from a certain someone and finished the work quicker than he had anticipated. He lift his hand to Keisuke’s forehead. It was still chiller than yesterday, but warmer than in the morning. Frowning he picked up the bucket from the floor and went out to fill it with cold water. After that he wet the cloth and left it on his head. He wished he would have been awake and able to drink some of the medicinal teas the healer had prepared.

The thought of tea lead his thoughts on food and made him realize he hadn’t eaten anything after a light breakfast. After a quick drop by the kitchen he had dried meat and porridge to eat as he sat down by the bed again. He finished his meal quickly, and descended back into his thoughts, staring at Keisuke, but not really seeing him.

With his mindset it took a while to register what he saw. Keisuke’s eyelids trembled a bit, and then slowly opened. He looked straight up into the ceiling before turning to the side. The light from the window lit his eyes, and the brightness of them finally drew Takumi back to reality. He got startled and almost knocked himself out of balance as he flinched back suddenly, kicking the pile of papers down and spreading them all over the floor. 

“Is this a dream?” Keisuke mumbled with a voice hoarse from being unused for a long time.

Takumi hesitated before answering. “No.”

He took a deep breath and looked straight up, not saying a word. Takumi wavered before speaking again, unsure of how he would react.

“How on earth did you end up here unseen?”

He turned to look at him again. “I am not sure.”

“Don’t just give me that, there are soldiers all around the land.”

Keisuke’s lips curled just the tinies bit, even as he was still kind of baffled from sleeping and the fever. “They were easy enough to avoid.”

Takumi grunted. That wasn’t something anyone would like to hear about their own soldiers. However, he had to continue on, there were too many questions to be asked. “You left your family and rode all the way here while being so sick. Are you trying to get yourself killed? You were barely alive when I found you.”

“Rich words from someone who actually stabbed me with a sword.”

Takumi rubbed the back of his head, embarrassed. “Uh, well… you gave a lot of reasons for that.”

“…I did.”

He closed his eyes, like talking had taken up most of his energy. Takumi realized that really might be the case as it had been ages since he had eaten. He suddenly rushed up and to the kitchen, not seeing how Keisuke looked after him, wonder on his eyes. After a moment he returned with a bowl of soft porridge and a cup of water. Seeing those made Keisuke’s eyes lit up. He tried to get up, only to end up realizing he didn’t have enough power to do that. Takumi set the things he carried aside, helping Keisuke to sit up. Then, he handed him the water, remembering to note “Drink slowly, there is plenty more.”

Keisuke took the cup as if it was the most precious thing ever, slowly enjoying the liquid. After he was done with that, Takumi gave him the food and went out to the well to get more water. He pulled up a full bucket and lift it on the brim of the well. The surface of the water rippled, but quickly calmed into a smooth, clear surface. Staring at the reflection of his own face Takumi finally started to grasp the situation.

Until then the whole conversation with Keisuke had seemed like a fever dream, even as he had denied it being a dream himself. He tried to think about what he should ask or do next but couldn’t seem to collect his thoughts to do that. He stared at his reflection for a second longer, before dipping his hand into the water and distorting the image. He washed his face, and the shivers from the chilly water seemed to wake him up a bit more. Closing his eyes he listened the voices of birds and wind humming in the trees. Small drops ran down his face, leaving behind cold lines. Finally he took a deep breath and opened his eyes. He reached for the hem of his shirt and rubbed his face dry. There was no turning back at this point, he needed to hear the other side of the story.

*

Keisuke had finished his meal and now stared out of the window. He didn’t move even as Takumi sat down on the stool next to him. Takumi didn’t speak, instead waiting for the other man to start the conversation. Keisuke clenched his fists tightly, before relaxing his body again. He lifted his hands to his face, sighed and looked at Takumi, who saw the tears glimmering on his eyes but still stayed silent.

“I…” Keisuke started, but staggered with his words for a moment and turned his eyes back to his hands. “I have been doing anything my father has requested for as long as I can remember. Everything I am or know how to do are just reflections of his needs. Just as you said, I have been his hunting dog. And... the one person keeping some sanity in my mind was always by brother.”

He stopped for a moment. Takumi was holding his breath, not daring to interrupt. After gathering the strength to continue he lifted his eyes. “But he is gone now, and I felt like I had no reason to live anymore. I blamed myself of everything. But… then I realized something else. It was not me, nor the person who shot the arrow I really should blame for his death. It’s our father. He started this pointless war. Without him Ryosuke, nor I, would never have been on that battlefield. Our worth to him was never anything more than to be obedient tools.”

Clenching his fists again he seemed to dwell deeper into his memories. Takumi couldn’t quite comprehend what he had just heard. On the outside their social standing was so similar to each other, but the way they had been brought up was like night and day.

Keisuke interrupted his thoughts as he whispered. “I never second-guessed anything before you awakened my memories on that night before the battle, and still decided to ignore those feelings.” He looked at Takumi with desperation. “And that’s just one of the things I now realize were wrong.”

After the locks had been opened there seemed to be no end for his story. Everything from how his father had planned the assassination of the late king, to how he had been looking for information about the Fujiwaras as they met and finally to the coldness of his actions after the battle. He didn’t try to sugar-coat his own part in all of that, only telling the bare truth.

Takumi listened quietly, realizing this was probably the first time Keisuke had ever poured out his thoughts so openly. His feelings wavered between anger, pity and worry. The situation was even worse to what they had though. It seemed like the King was determined to wipe the whole Fujiwara family and their history away. This was no ordinary desire for their recourses but outright revenge for something they didn’t seem to know about, or that Bunta had still left untold.

As he finished his story Keisuke looked straight at him and said. “I don’t ask you to forgive the things I’ve done to you. Just let me help you to defeat my father.”

He answered his stare. The story seemed convincing and would explain why he had run away from his father. Still, deep in his mind a small though of this all being just a clever attack against them gnawed on. But as they looked at each other he felt like he saw Keisuke’s real thoughts reflect on the honesty of his stare, and he decided to take a leap of fate. “Fine. We’ll put the past behind us.”

Keisuke seemed to move his right hand over the wound without thinking, before just saying “Thank you.”


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was so much fun to write! And once again I broke my own record of the longest chapter 😂 This one here is just 700 words shorter than chapters 1-3 together... whoops. I hope you enjoy!

The countless small birds of the forest sang their songs in hopes of finding a mate for the spring. The concert slowly made its way into Keisuke’s dream, waking him up. His whole body ached from both his injuries and lying still for days. Nevertheless he felt much better than yesterday, partially because his fever had subdued but even more thanks to pouring his heart out. Though he felt a bit ashamed for doing that with someone he hardly knew. It had just been his only option in the current situation. At least their similar background as sons of old, powerful families might have helped Takumi to understand some of his problems. Keisuke had been prepared to be dragged to lord Fujiwara to be held accountable, but instead his son had offered truce. 

Takumi’s open-mindedness with this topic both intrigued and scared Keisuke as he couldn’t really tell what the man was thinking. His usual nonchalant expression had only ever been breached by anger… Expect that he suddenly he realized it wasn’t true. There had been other times too, like when they met for the second time. His laughter after they had tested each other’s skills in a stick fight. And his shock at the solstice ball. After Keisuke had been forced to see Takumi as an enemy he had tried to remove all his feelings regarding the man, but now they started to crawl back into his mind, and he couldn’t help but to wonder what would come out of their new situation.

Keisuke carefully sat up on the bed. It seemed like the sun had risen a while ago. After their talk last night he had only asked a few more questions before getting sleepy again. It seemed he had slept through the whole night after that. Now there was no sign of Takumi anywhere, the voices of the birds being the only sign of life in his vicinity. Looking around he noticed his pants, washed and neatly folded on the stool next to the bed. His boots were next to the door, cleaned from all of the mud that had been covering them. There was no sign of his jacket or shirt and he briefly wondered what had happened to them. His memories of the journey were fuzzy at best, even more so towards the end. At some point he had blacked out, only to wake up in an unfamiliar cottage, Takumi tending to him.

Deciding not to think about the whole situation too much he reached for his pants, struggling a bit but managing to get them on without moving his shoulder too much. He carefully laid his feet on the ground, testing if they would be strong enough to carry him. He stood up slowly, closing his eyes as he felt a bit dizzy all of a sudden. Leaning on the wall helped him to stay up and the break also allowed the ill feeling to pass. In place of a shirt he reached for his blanket and wrapped it around his upper body.

He slowly walked to the door, stopping to slip his boots on, not bothering to fasten the strings. Stepping outside he instantly saw an elderly woman working on the garden, planting something to the freshly turned soil. _She must be the healer Takumi mentioned last night_. Keisuke remarked.

As if she had realized someone was staring at her, she suddenly turned. After seeing Keisuke she got up, wiping her hands to her dirty apron before washing them with water. She spoke as if they were old acquaintances. “Oh my boy, you already have the energy to be up? That wound with such fever would have taken most to the underworld.”

Keisuke was unsure of how to react to her straightforward attitude, which reminded him of granny. So, he just mumbled “I’ve always healed quickly.”

“Well, it seems you indeed have experience on that. I don’t know what you’ve been doin' to get that many scars at such a youn' age. But enough of that, it’s not my business unless you decide so. Sit down and I’ll fetch somethin’ to eat. Fresh air won’t do any harm to you.”

Keisuke sat down to the long bench on the cottage’s side, pulling the blanket a bit tighter around his body. The sun shined straight to him, warming quite a bit but the air was still crisp.

It didn’t take too long before the healer came back, handing him a slice of meat pie before disappearing back inside. The smell of the pie made his stomach growl, and he didn’t wait to start eating. As the healer got back with a tea pot and two cups he was already almost finished. She sat down next to him, pouring them both a cup of the tea. Reaching for a pouch on her belt she added some kind of powder to the other cup, stirred it with a wooden spoon and handed it over to Keisuke, who sniffed it a bit cautiously.

She chuckled. “I won’t poison you. It’s just an herbal tea I made. I added echinacea for you to help avoid any swellin’ on the wound.”

Keisuke was a bit embarrassed. “Sorry, it’s somewhat of a habit.”

He took a sip and was astonished at the sweet and floral taste. The surprise seemed to show on his face, as the healer smiled and added “I use honey on my mixes to hide some of the bitterness of the herbs. There is no reason why medicine couldn’t taste sweet after all.”

He could feel warmth reaching everywhere, making him nice and cosy. A feeling he wasn’t too familiar with. “It’s great.”

They sat there together, sipping tea, and looking at the birds that collected twigs and other things for their nests. Keisuke finished his cup, and the calm atmosphere slowly lulled him back to sleep.

*

He woke up as the sun hid behind the clouds that had started to gather on the sky, withdrawing the warmth of sun. Just as he opened his eyes the healer came back from inside. “Oh good, you are awake. I was just about to wake you.”

Keisuke blinked a few times to shake off the sleepiness, feeling a bit annoyed that he had fallen asleep again. She seemed to notice the irritation and added. “Sleepin’ is an important part of the healin’. It’s perfectly natural. You’ll notice the sleepiness easin’ as you get better.

Keisuke just nodded and tried to get up but realized that someone had placed a thick bear pelt over him. He had to actually use some force to get it off, which only made him feel more pathetic about the loss of his usual energy. The healer looked at his struggle. “The last thin’ we want is for you to catch a cold, so youn’ master covered you with that when he visited.”

Keisuke was baffled for a second. “Young master?”

“The son of lord Fujiwara. You spoke to him yesterday.”

“Oh, yes. Him.”

“It seems like he feels somehow responsible for you.”

“Uh, well… A lot has happened between us.”

She raised a brow but didn’t press any further and Keisuke didn’t do so voluntarily. He would leave it to Takumi to decide what she should know. He stood up and barely managed to grab the pelt to his hold while also trying to keep the blanket on his shoulders.

“He mentioned he would try to find some clothes for you as the ones you wore were beyond repairin’.”

“He is too generous.”

The healer laughed happily. “He’s never been a posh youn’ lord, but very down-to-earth. Just about the best friend you might make if you manage to get behind his seemin' indifference.”

Keisuke couldn’t help but to think that he had indeed moved past his indifference, but in all the wrong ways. Fighting together to defend a common enemy was about the best he could ever hope for their relationship. After that they would probably just stay away from each other’s sight.

*

The healer had been called in to the town to help with childbirth, and Keisuke was alone at the cottage. He wandered around the small space and out of habit looked for anything that could be used as a weapon and explored for possible escape ways before realizing neither wouldn’t be needed. If he were to harm anyone walking through the door Takumi would definitely end their newly made truce and finish him off himself. As for escaping, he was in no condition to run anywhere, already having teased death for too many times. If he continued ignoring his body’s needs death would eventually catch up to him.

He sighed and tried to find something else to do, settling for a book of medicinal herbs. He flipped through the pages and looked at the pictures. _Allium Sativum, Hydrastis Canadensis, Plantago Major…_ The names said nothing to him, but he realized he had seen the plants growing wild in the nature. He looked through their uses: curing colds, helping with asthma, healing wounds and so on. Never in his life had he stopped and thought of the fact that such plain plants could be used to cure people. Instead, he had just walked over them, crushing them under his boots.

He was just about to fall back into the dark memories of his past as someone knocked on the door. Without thinking he had already hopped away from the bed, reaching for the carafe on the table. The sudden movement was too much for his exhausted body, which didn’t live up to the plans of his brain, instead falling down on the floor. He knocked down the stool as he fell, which resulted in a loud clank.

The person behind the door didn’t wait for longer, but rushed in. For a moment the two men stared at each other, before the one who had come in loosened up a bit and asked “Are you all right?”

Keisuke felt a blush creeping up his neck after being seen in such a humiliating position. He pushed himself up with his good hand and patted some non-existing dust from his pants. “Never better.”

The man looked rightfully doubtful of that but didn’t say a word. Keisuke looked at him and realized he seemed somehow familiar but couldn’t quite pinpoint why. There was nothing special about him. His hair was brown and cut short, and he seemed to have forgotten to shave as the stubble already pushed from his jaw. The clothes he wore revealed nothing either, being just old worn-down pair of greyish brown pants, shirt any farmer would use and a cape with a muddy hem. Still, he didn’t seem to be too surprised to find Keisuke in place of the healer, which made him think he knew who he was.

The man turned back to the door and picked up something he had dropped. Closing the door behind himself he walked to the table and lift his package there. “Takumi asked me to bring these. He has meetings to attend.”

Keisuke couldn’t quite keep quiet as he heard him speak so casually about the lord’s son. “Takumi?”

He looked at Keisuke angrily. “Don’t play games with me. You know him. He is the only reason you are even alive at this moment. If it was for me I would have left you to rot in that forest.”

And then it clicked. He was the knight that had been with Takumi on the burnt village. Without his armour he looked much more common than before.

“I… Uh, I am thankful for him. I was just surprised of someone else coming.” He tactfully ignored the latter part of his words.

The man sighed. “Fine. Did anyone see you when they came for the healer?”

“No. She only talked to them at the door, and after that no one has come.”

He sat down by the table and started to open the package he had brought. “Good. Your identity _must_ stay as a secret. Though, even if no one knows your face that hair still attracts way too much attention.”

“It always does.” Keisuke said a bit bitterly.

The man pulled out a plain shirt and a long, hooded cape from the package and handed them to Keisuke. But that wasn’t all. He picked up a small, cubic package and peeled away the cloth that covered it. Keisuke smelled something faintly ashy and was confused. “What is that?”

“Dye for your hair.”

Somehow Keisuke had never before come across such a thing, so he just looked at the man a bit confused. He sighed and handed the piece over. “Rinse your hair and this, then rub it in and let it sit for a while. It’ll stick to the hair and change its colour to something brownish. It’ll wash off after a while, so don’t forget to use it every now and then.”

Keisuke stared at the cube, being a bit doubtful that it would actually work. He looked back at the man. “Where did you get this?”

“One of the merchants, he had brought it from the south.”

“Why? Did he need to hide someone as well?”

“Well… No. Some of the escort girls use it to enhance the colour of their own hair.”

“…I see.”

Neither of them said anything for a while. Suddenly the man got up, heading for the door. “Okay then. Just use it as soon as possible.”

Keisuke hated himself for having to say the words he was about to let out of his mouth. “I can’t.”

The man stopped and turned back at him. “What?”

Keisuke pointed at his shoulder.

“…Right.” He looked around, trying to find an escape to what he realized he had to do, before finally accepting it and sighing deeply. “Come out. I’ll do it. Take the stool with you.”

Keisuke had no choice but to follow him. The man ordered him to sit down on the stool, close to the well.

“Lean your head back.”

He barely managed to close his eyes before a bucketful of water was poured to his head. He kept them closed, and soon noticed the ashy smell of the dye, just before the man started to spread out the paste all over his hair. The position was quite uncomfortable, and Keisuke wriggled a bit as he waited for the man to finish his task.

He held Keisuke’s head between his hands uncomfortably long, making him open his eyes to see what was going on. The dark eyes answered his confused stare, and the man spoke. “If you ever do anything to Takumi I’ll see that you get what you deserve.”

Keisuke couldn’t tell if it was from the water dripping down his naked back, or from the determination on the man’s voice, but he felt chills going through his body. “Understood.”

*

Keisuke laid on the bed, staring at the ceiling, wondering how he could have felt annoyed of sleeping so much just same morning. A hint of moisture lingered on his hair, and he couldn’t help but to play with the strands. There was nothing like a mirror in the cottage, and he had no idea how the colour had turned out. He had even thought about cutting some off just to see but deemed it a bit too reckless to do. The man had pretty much just looked at the dried hair, nodded and added “It’s different enough.” Before picking up his belongings and leaving Keisuke alone. Not that he hadn’t remembered to firmly order him to stay inside in all cases.

He had obeyed without complaining. After all, what would he do alone in this strange land. He had even refrained from using any candles or burning wood on the fireplace as it would have showed that someone used the healer’s cottage even as the person themselves was still elsewhere.

He turned his head slightly and looked out. The moon was already up, and the light dimmed and brightened constantly with the clouds moving through the sky. The change of light was even evident through his lids after he once again closed his eyes. The changing lights slowly turned into figures in his mind, and he was pulled into the dreams he dreaded.

*

Keisuke opened his eyes and gasped for air. He didn’t remember what he had dreamt of, but the feeling of suffocating lingered on his chest and even the weight of blankets began to feel unbearable. He threw them to the floor as fast as he could. The chilly air hit his warm skin and he shivered. There was no way sleeping would be possible anymore, so he just got up and picked up the cloak he had been given yesterday.

The sun had already risen, and it seemed that the healer had returned at some point as her pouch now laid on the table. Trying to be as silent as possible, a talent he had indeed honed thorough the years, Keisuke walked out and sat to the bench beside the cottage wall. The feeling of as light breeze on his skin helped to keep his mind away from more depressing thoughts even as he closed his eyes. Trying to focus on the voices of nature he almost managed to find peace of mind in that moment.

A sudden loud, metallic screech teared him back into the reality, and before even thinking he jumped up, his eyes wide open. It had come from behind the storage shack, from the gate on the wall. Someone was coming. _What a lousy design, there should always be a straight view from the door to the gate._ Keisuke thought, before remembering his usual answer of preparing to fight anyone coming to him wouldn’t work this time. He weighed his two options. Run and hide or meet the person eye to eye. He could already hear the steps of the person coming as the warning from last night came to his mind. _Stay as a secret._

Keisuke sprinted faster than he had in a long while, aiming for the other side of the shack, trying to leave it between him and whoever was coming to see the healer. He managed to get into cover just before he would have been seen. Luckily the ground was soft outside the stoned path so his steps shouldn’t have been heard.

Running had taken up more of his energy than he had anticipated and trying to control his breathing was challenging. Trying to stay in cover he carefully glimpsed at the person who had come, only to realize all of this had been in vain. It was Takumi.

Keisuke sighed deeply and stepped away from the shack. “I am here.”

Takumi flinched and turned to him, only to freeze in place after his eyes met Keisuke, who walked closer to him, saying “The man you sent yesterday told me I need to keep my stay in here a secret, so I hid when I heard you.”

He didn’t seem to hear his words, instead still just staring at him, before finally saying “Your hair.”

Keisuke had already forgot it, but now realized his appearance must have changed quite a bit. “Oh, right.”

Takumi seemed to collect himself after the initial shock. “I almost didn’t recognize you.”

“Isn’t that proof it’s working, then?”

“Indeed. When Iketani said he had a plain for your disguise I hardly could have imagined anything like this.”

 _Ah, so that’s the name of the knight_. Keisuke remarked to himself before saying “What does it look like? I can’t see for myself.”

Something Keisuke couldn’t really pinpoint flashed on Takumi’s face before it returned to his usual expression. “It’s, uh… brown. A bit lighter still than mine, but nothing too uncommon.”

Keisuke played with a strand of his hair and spoke his thoughts out loud. “In a way, I have always hoped to know what it’s like to look common. To be able to walk among people without the stares and whispers.”

“Well, I wouldn’t glance you twice, expect maybe for the fact that you are taller than most.”

Keisuke didn’t know why but he didn’t like hearing those words. Takumi already continued on, not letting him think about it. “Only me and Iketani know of your real identity, and besides us only the healer has seen you. I thought you’d have to stay here at all times but seeing you now I might be able to take you to the town.”

Keisuke got a bit excited thinking about the possibility of doing something else than just sitting around for the whole day. “Really?”

“Really. After you get some of your strength back. And only with me.” His eyes suddenly turned cold. “If I ever catch you lurking around alone I won’t hesitate to lock you up.”

Keisuke straightened his posture instinctively. “Understood.”

Takumi loosened up again. “Good. Have you eaten yet?”

“No.”

“Me neither.”

He sat on the bench Keisuke had been sitting before and took out a fresh bread and a piece of cheese from the pouch he had carried. “Come on then.”

Keisuke walked to him and sat down. They ate in silence, listening to the sounds of nature. As they finished the healer suddenly came out with a pot of hot tea.

“Good mornin’ boys. What a lovely day.”

“I trust that the childbirth went well as you are in such a good mood?” Takumi asked, smile on his face.

“Indeed. They now have a beautiful baby girl.”

The conversation between her and Takumi flowed on and Keisuke listened to their voices, sipping the tea she had given to him. The topics were mundane, but they joked and laughed in between them. The care they had for each other was clear to see, and it reminded him of the granny back home. He hoped she hadn’t gotten into any trouble after he had run away. Listening to the carefree conversation took his thoughts away from the current situation, and he wished the moment could have continued on forever. Of course that couldn’t happen and soon Takumi had to leave to do his tasks.

*

On the next day Takumi came again at the same time, this time with a piece of smoked ham to accompany the bread. The same pattern repeated through the week. On some days they just sat together, contently eating and listening the voices of nature, but on other days they spoke for hours about random things like what had been their favourite treats as kids or which kind of ponies they had learned to ride with. The latter subject of which reminded Keisuke of his own mount, who he had much to his own shame forgot about until that point. He was quite relieved after learning that the mare was taken good care of at the stables of the manor.

It felt odd to talk about his childhood memories with someone. Up until now the only two people to whom he might have shared these things already knew them, probably remembering the happenings even better than he himself. Even as the events of the past months made the current truce feel like they were walking on thin ice, Keisuke still enjoyed the mornings he spent with Takumi. He listened the stories calmly, telling ones of his own in return but still never really showing his own emotions unlike when he spoke to the healer. Keisuke was left feeling a bit bothered about that, but he had no right to complain.

After Takumi had to leave in the noon Keisuke spend his days helping the healer with small tasks like mixing the herbs or cutting bandages from linen. Luckily for them the warmth of spring really started to hit the land, and she could do her job outside, leaving Keisuke to hide in the cottage while the townspeople came to seek remedies.

One morning as they sat outside eating Takumi said “You seem to be much better already.”

“I guess the treatment and rest is starting to show.”

“Good. I guess you are getting frustrated on just sitting here. Do you feel like you have enough strength for a small trip?”

Keisuke could barely contain his excitement. Exercising was just the thing he had missed on the last few days. “Certainly!”

“Great. We have to go through the town, so you’ll be seen. I brought something to help with that.”

Takumi lifted up the package that had attracted Keisuke’s attention as soon as he had seen it. Anything differing from the usual instantly did. He swiftly opened the package and Keisuke stared at the contents. An embroidered wisteria emblem decorated the otherwise plain dark cape and pants. Keisuke lifted his eyes to look at Takumi. “What is this?”

“A way no one will pay too much attention to you. The basic uniform of the manor guards. If anyone asks you are a new trainee attending me. People expect to see me with someone like that, so they’ll focus on me instead of you. If you were to wear regular clothing people would wonder about it way more.”

“I see, direct the attention away from me. Quite clever I must say.”

“Of course.” He handed the clothes to Keisuke. “I’ll wait for you to change.”

“Wait, we are going right now?”

“Yes. I fear my freedom will become much less in the near future.” He glanced at the sky. “And the weather is perfect for picking some mushrooms.”

Keisuke didn’t think he had heard him correctly. “Mushrooms? In the spring?”

Takumi looked at him, just a hint of mischief on his face. “Indeed. Now go change city boy and I’ll teach you something more about the woods.”

Keisuke went inside and took out the outfit. He touched the emblem and felt the silver threads that made it up. He was suddenly reminded of the torn Fujiwara flag he had used as a bandage in the battlefield. In a twist of fate it had been what saved him from too much blood loss. Now it seemed that the same emblem would help him hide in the town. Still… He had no right to wear this outfit. Not after he had almost ended the Fujiwara family line with Takumi.

Sighing deeply he tried to tell himself that Takumi had ordered him to do this so it would be all right. It was just thread on fabric, and nothing more, right? Trying to believe that he took out the pants. It was a bit of a struggle to get them on with just one hand, but he managed. The cape worked perfectly in hiding his left hand that the healer had tied to his body in order to prevent him from moving it.

As he stepped outside he saw Takumi leaning his head to the cottage wall, his eyes closed, and hands crossed on his chest. He looked exhausted, and Keisuke didn’t know how he hadn’t noticed that before. He was the heir of the province, a lot of things on his shoulders, yet still found time every day to come meet him and never seemed to be in too much of a rush. How did he even manage to do all that?

Keisuke sat down next to him, but he didn’t wake up. Their shoulders almost touched but Keisuke wasn’t bothered by that. Not daring to wake Takumi up he too closed his eyes and leaned back. It didn’t take more than a moment for him to also drift off to sleep.

*

It was already close to midday when the healer returned back from the town. She walked the paved path to her cottage but sopped on her steps when he noticed the two boys basking in the warm spring sun, Takumi leaning his head to the other one’s healthy shoulder. She smiled at the sight before walking inside.

The steps of the healer had woken Keisuke but had kept his eyes closed after a fast peak as he didn’t know how to react to the situation. He could feel the weight of Takumi leaning on him, and the warmth radiating from him felt almost comforting. Neither of them had intended to fall asleep, neither end up so close to each other. Keisuke was locked into his place as any movement of his would definitely wake Takumi up.

The door clanked as the healer went inside, rescuing Keisuke from his incipient panic. He could feel Takumi twitch, so he slowly opened his eyes and looked at the man leaning to him. He too opened his eyes and lifted them to meet Keisuke’s. Their colour seemed even more deep blue than before, even as the sleepiness and confusion reflected from them. Keisuke couldn’t help it and said. “Did you sleep well?”

That finally woke Takumi properly, and he pushed himself up, away from Keisuke. The sudden feeling of lost warmth tingled in Keisuke’s arm and shoulder, and he found himself wanting it back. He looked at Takumi and noticed faint blush creeping up his neck. Trying to ignore that he cleared his throat. “You fell asleep while I changed and seemed so tired I didn’t dare to wake you.”

Takumi rubbed his face and sighed. “I guess it shouldn’t be that surprising. I haven’t slept well in ages.”

Keisuke was a bit surprised of him being so straightforward, not trying to hide his weaknesses.

Takumi flexed his shoulders and looked at the sky. “We still have time to go.” He looked at Keisuke. “If you are still up for that?”

He got up too. “I feel much more energetic than I have in a long time.”

“Good then.” Takumi eyed his outfit before adding. “That will do. Just follow me, and don’t look anyone in the eye.”

“Right. But why are we walking through the town if we are to pick mushrooms? We already are in a forest?”

“They don’t grow just about everywhere.”

Without explaining anything more Takumi lead the way towards the town, and Keisuke followed without saying a word. The healer’s cottage was built away from the town and they had to walk through a small path to reach the main road. Whereas in the harvest time the road would have been filled with merchants and farmers going to town to pay their taxes it now was empty. Soon the forest on the sides of the road changed into fields, and the men and women working there barely glanced at the two men walking past.

The town started just where the fields ended. On the background, on a small hill stood the Fujiwara manor. Keisuke couldn’t help but to stare at the building. Oh what he would have given to reach this place last fall, when the words of his father still were like a law to him.

Takumi glanced at him. “I know you are curious but try to seem like you are used to everything, it’ll draw less attention.”

“Sorry.”

They walked straight into the main road of the town and saw more and more people as they advanced. Quite a few greeted Takumi and he greeted them back. As they reached the town market many of the merchants tried to lure Takumi into their booths. They offered everything a young noble man might hope. Beautifully engraved daggers, thick note papers the colour of cream and talismans to find love. Takumi just smiled politely to all of them, declined and continued on.

After walking through the town Takumi guided them through small paths in the woods, some of which were almost fading into the forest floor. Keisuke had lost his sense of direction a while ago. He only knew that they were somewhere near the manor. He hated to admit it, but the long walk started to take its toll on him, and he was almost ready to ask for a break when they emerged from the forest into a clearing. The trees had been cut and the ground turned some years ago, and now grass and other small plants grew next to the stumps.

Takumi looked back and noticed his exhaustion. The ground was still moist from the snow that had melted not long ago, so he spread out a dree hide before sitting down. Keisuke sat too, thankful for the break. He dug out the water pouch and accepted the piece of pie Takumi offered.

After the break Takumi got up, and Keisuke followed him. He still didn’t know what exactly they were looking for, so he just followed him around until he suddenly crouched down to pick something up. It was a dark brown…. mass. The surface was wrinkled and under it peaked a lighter straight leg. Keisuke would never have given such a thing another look.

“…What is that?”

“A mushroom called false morel.”

“Is it eatable? Or for something else?”

Takumi looked straight at him. “When it’s raw, it’s deadly poisonous. With the right preparations it can be turned into a delicacy.”

“That kind of plants really exist?”

“They like to grow on shadow and in small holes.” Takumi continued, without answering the question. He turned away and continued his search. Keisuke stood still for a moment before doing the same.

*

After an hour or so they had gathered quite hefty amount of the mushrooms, and Takumi decided it was time to go back. They’d still need to get back to the healer’s cottage before dark. After walking for a while he suddenly stopped and turned to Keisuke.

“Do you want to see your mare?”

“Can I?”

Takumi rubbed his chin, deep in thought. “My father is out of the town and the guards should be changing shifts around now.”

Keisuke thought about that for a moment. As silly as it sounded his horse was about the only concrete link to his former life right now, and she had carried him to these lands even as he had fainted. She had more than deserved some treats and pats. “I’d like that.”

“Let’s hurry then.”

Takumi picked up his pace, but Keisuke managed to keep up. It took only a moment before the stone wall surrounding the manor greeted them. He hadn’t realized how close it had been. Without hesitation Takumi followed the wall straight towards the main gate. When they saw it he pulled Keisuke behind one of the thick wisteria tree trunks and peaked at the gate.

He had been right about the change of shifts. As they watched a man in full armour walked from the manor to the guard who had stood on the gate before. They spoke briefly and the previous one left. The new guard had his helmet on, so Keisuke didn’t recognize him, and couldn’t help but to whisper “Why isn’t he wearing the same outfit I am?”

“The main gate guards are always in full armour.”

After saying that he stepped away from the tree and headed straight to the man. Keisuke panicked, whispering to him “What are you doing?”

Takumi glanced back and just said “Follow me.”

Hesitant to do so Keisuke pondered his options for a moment before finally cursing and following him. He was more nervous than he had been in ages. Takumi on the other hand walked confidently, like the owned the place. Which, thinking about it, was about right.

The guard noticed them, and instead of alarming someone else he seemed to panic. He ran to them and Keisuke realized it was the same man who had come to the cottage. _Iketani_ , he reminded himself.

“What are you doing Takumi? Why is _he_ here?”

“Hush. It’s just for a second. Just stay here and don’t say anything.”

Takumi patted his shoulder before going through the gate. Keisuke glanced at the knight before following but managed to catch a glimpse of his eyes and the frustrated and nervous look they had.

The stable was the closest building from the gate, and most other guards seemed to be elsewhere, probably eating or resting so they walked uninterrupted. Takumi opened the door of the stable and peaked in before going in.

The familiar smell of horses, hay and leather hit Keisuke as soon as he stepped in. The horses looked at them, some trying to beg for treats. Takumi patted a grey horse as he passed it and Keisuke recognized her as the same mount Takumi had rode on the battlefield.

They turned around a corner and Keisuke saw his own mare. She also seemed to recognize him as she neighed loudly and shook her head around. He walked to her and wrapped his arm around her neck. She was warm and comforting.

Takumi told him that he would look for some treats and disappeared somewhere. Keisuke was left alone. “We sure have come a long way, right girl?” He muttered to the horse. She blew air to his neck and he couldn’t help but to laugh.

Suddenly he heard steps coming towards him but assumed it was just Takumi coming back and didn’t turn to look. The steps stopped and he heard someone say “I didn’t know we had such a horse.”

Keisuke’s eyes widened. The voice was slightly familiar, but he couldn’t tell why. The mare’s head and neck blocked his view, so he slowly peaked from behind her. His eyes met the older man’s ones and he paled. It was lord Fujiwara, who continued on “Nor a guard like you.”


End file.
